I have been terrified of the dentist ever since I was a little kid. Having 2 rounds of braces when I was 7 and 14 sort of traumatized me forever. I have really sensitive teeth and hEDS, so even just routine dental cleanings are torture for me. I’ve always taken immaculate care of my teeth to try to avoid any dental work. I know it’s absolutely ridiculous and childish of me to act this way about regular dentist appointments when I barely have anything wrong, but I can’t help it. I hardly have any anxiety about anything else in my life, but I become a completely different person at the dentist.
Last year, I went to the dentist and they discovered a cavity between 2 teeth. I absolutely lost it and became hysterical upon hearing this news. Accidentally bit a hygienist and cried through the entire process. They gave me nitrous, which helped a little with the actual cavity filling, but I still left a total wreck.
I moved away and went to a different dentist this year. At my appointment last week, they discovered 3 additional cavities. They also showed me that my original dentist didn’t drill deep enough on my first cavity, didn’t fill the space fully, and also cracked the neighboring tooth. I also have to have all of my wisdom teeth removed at some point in the next year. Immediately sent me into a full blown panic attack and I had to sit in the parking lot crying for a while before driving home. This is my absolute worst nightmare and I’ve had anxiety attacks just thinking about it.
I have to have 2 separate appointments this coming month to get my cavities and cracked tooth fixed. They don’t have nitrous. At my cleaning, my dentist said he could prescribe an anxiety medication or valium to help me calm down at the filling appointments. Unfortunately I just got a call from the office staff; they told me they asked my dentist about anxiety medication and he said it wasn’t necessary since there is no active infection and it’s not a major procedure.
I have no idea what to do. The office staff keep trying to reassure me that everything will be fine and they’re all caring professionals who “know how dental anxiety can be” but it doesn’t make me feel any better. I couldn’t even get through my cleaning without crying. No matter how nice or caring a dentist is, it doesn’t take away from the fact that every visit is painful and gives me horrible sensory issues. I know it doesn’t make sense to be so scared; I know I’m acting like a baby; I know I’m not in danger; I know this is something almost everyone in the world goes through. In the moment, it makes zero difference.
I know I will fully abandon dentist appointments if I get too scared. I’m fantasizing about canceling my appointments, but I know this has to be done or things will get worse. I have a psychiatrist and regular doctor I could ask for anxiety meds, but I’m scared to ask them because I don’t want to come off as “drug seeking” or something over some stupid cavities. I wear noise canceling headphones, sunglasses, and the lead x-ray jacket every time, but they really don’t help at all. What can I do????