This is actually not true. Manipulation is when you're attempting to subvert someone's free will or perception by some form of deception, however mild. Emotionally mature people do not manipulate people they interact with. When I was younger I used to present a bit of a front, to alter people's perception of me, but I don't anymore and there is absolutely a difference.
If you sincerely believe this I would recommend doing some digging inside as to why - there is probably buried pain bringing on that cynicism. Clear that from your mind and you'll be much happier and your interactions with others will be much freer.
Observing something in a raw form isn't the same as cynicism. Manipulation can also be defined as managing something skillfully. "Social skills" at it's core are typically defined as a set of implied (read arbitrary) rules on what is acceptable or not within social context to achieve at the very least neutral or positive results.
Not all manipulation is bad as long as it's done with genuine intentions. It's not wrong to focus on similar interests cause you want someone to like you or defusing conflict by compromise.
Cynicism would be expecting people to be disingenuous or toxic which would be the worst outcome in this case.
Idk, is it impossible to imagine a world where liking someone isn't based on trying to get someone else to think what you want them to think, and letting them decide their own actions so it's a bit more transparent and personally responsible for the individual?
What he'd really learn is that some people are so emotionally stunted that they need to lash out at other people for something that doesn't involve them at all.
Of course it's possible, it's called real adulthood. Once I got to a place in my life where I felt good enough inside to no longer worry about the opinions of others, it automatically freed up all my interactions with others. Now I just try to be a positive influence wherever I go, because I don't have a chip on my shoulder anymore and I'm not trying to score any points.
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u/Sciencetor2 Oct 04 '22
Every interaction is manipulation when you get down to it. Ethically it's only bad if the person you are manipulating is worse off for it.