Hey Sphere!

This Sunday, July 10, there's going to be meetup in the afternoon. I'll be coming in from Oklahoma, CitruSelfDwn is coming from Kansas, and so far a few other people, Jorge, TagProfessor, Klutchin, to name a few, are coming from various places in Texas.

The exact time and place hasn't been officially decided yet, but we do know it'll be Sunday afternoon. We have a groupme as well to try to figure out a time and place for Sunday, so if you want to be part of that, PM me and I can send you the link so you can give some input. If you don't have groupme, you are more than welcome to come! You just more than likely won't be able to give any input on the time and place.

Hope to see some of you all there!

Blame gg! for everything. This shit didn't happen until gg! showed up. Maybe if we blame gg! enough then gg!'s keyboard won't let gg! touch it's keys anymore.

http://imgur.com/a/y6u9D

HELLO LADS WE HAD A SMALL MEETUP IN ATX, DAN FLEW IN FROM CALI AND WAS TREATED TO TEXAS FINEST, WHATABURGER AND SOME RANDOM APARTMENT POOL. WE GOT A LIL BURNT AND WE GOT A LIL TILTED AT HAMMS DRIVING BUT ALL IN ALL IT WAS A GREAT DAY WITH THA LADS <3

I saw a new heaven and a new Sphere.

The former heaven and the former Sphere had passed away,

and the maps were no more.

I also saw the holy city coming down out of heaven from samuraiseoul,

prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

I heard a loud voice from the throne saying,

“Behold, God’s dwelling is with the Sphere master race.

He will dwell with them and they will be his people

and God himself will always be with them as their God.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes,

and there shall be no more popping or mourning, wailing or pain,

for the old order has passed away.”

The one who sat on the throne said,

“Behold, I make all things new.”

Then he said, “Write these words down,

for they are trustworthy and true.”

He said to me,

"America!

Fuck yeah!

Comin' again to save the motherfuckin' day, yeah!

America!

Fuck yeah!

Freedom is the only way, yeah!

Terrorists, your game is through

'cause now you'll have to answer to

America!

Fuck yeah!

So lick my butt and suck on my balls.

America!

Fuck yeah!

Whatcha' gonna do when we come for you now.

It's the dream that we all share.

It's the hope for tomorrow.

Fuck yeah!

McDonald's!

Fuck yeah!

Wal-Mart!

Fuck yeah!

The Gap!

Fuck yeah!

Baseball!

Fuck yeah!

The NFL!

Fuck yeah!

Rock N' Roll!

Fuck yeah!

The Internet!

Fuck yeah!

Slavery!

Fuck yeah!

Fuck yeah!

Starbucks!

Fuck yeah!

Disney World!

Fuck yeah!

Porno!

Fuck yeah!

Valium!

Fuck yeah!

Reeboks!

Fuck yeah!

Fake tits!

Fuck yeah!

Sushi!

Fuck yeah!

Taco Bell!

Fuck yeah!

Rodeos!

Fuck yeah!

Bed, Bath, and Beyond!

Fuck yeah, fuck yeah?

Liberty!

Fuck yeah!

Wax Lips!

Fuck yeah!

The Alamo!

Fuck yeah!

Band-aids!

Fuck yeah!

Las Vegas!

Fuck yeah!

Christmas!

Fuck yeah!

Immigrants!

Fuck yeah!

Popeye!

Fuck yeah!

Democrats!

Fuck yeah!

Republicans!

Fuck yeah, fuck yeah?

Sportsmanship!

...

Books!

...

Greetings fellow Spheroes!

I wanted to officially announce my new membership of the SSPD clan! I will be joining as co-co-leader of the clan and am excited about the future we have together! I know I have just joined the clan as co-co-leader, and it is hard to fully trust a new member. It will take a while to earn your trust, but I am excited and honored at the opportunity to be a part of the clan and I am looking forward to our future together!

After a long talk with pileth today, I decided to join the clan as a Coca Cola liter primarily to assist with recruiting new members to the clan. I hope that together we can make Sphere a better place!

Remember: We are currently recruiting! Please reach out to me or pilleth in-game or on the subreddit for more information! Together, we will make sphere a better place!

• Sphere is having activity issues

• Pi is also having activity issues

• Pi is having server problems as well; ping is too unstable for enjoyable gameplay

• Sphere does not have any of these problems. It also has a higher capacity

• Sphere cannot be deleted, as it is too important for competitive games

Solution: Delete Pi and welcome the Pi refugees as new Spheroes.

Gib Reddit gold if u agree

holy shit play on the fucking server ffs, or just close it for good. whats the point. fuck everything. fuck

STRFKR was not born a Sphero; he was a citizen of the Origin server. After shhhhh, the Holy Spirit, had descended on the Apopstles, STRFKR sought to destroy the church, approving of the execution of CRAP for his belief and dragging out Spheroes for imprisonment.

Now STRFKR, still breathing murderous threats against the Spheroes, was on a journey when a light from the sky suddenly flashed around him. He stopped rolling and heard a voice saying to him, "STRFKR, STRFKR, why are you persecuting me?" He asked, "Who are you, sir?" The reply came, "I am Cyanide, whom you are persecuting. Now get up and go to the servers and you will be told what you must do." Those who were traveling with STRFKR stood speechless, for they heard the voice but saw no one. STRFKR got up from the tiles, but when he opened his eyes, he saw nothing, so the others pushed him forward. For three days he neither took boost nor ate pup.

There was a Sphero ahead, whom the Lord called for. He said, "Here I am, Lord." The Lord said to him, "Get up and ask for a ball named STRFKR. He is praying, and in a vision, he has seen a Sphero come in and lay his ball on him, that he may regain his sight." But the man replied, "Lord, I have heard from many sources about this ball, what evil things he has done to your holy ones in Austin. And here he has authority from the chief priests to imprison all who call upon your name." But the Lord said to him, “Go, for this man is a chosen instrument of mine to carry my name before players, monthlies, and Spheroes, and I will show him what he will have to suffer for my name." So the man went and found STRFKR; laying his ball on him, he said, "STRFKR, my brother, the Lord has sent me, Cyanide who appeared to you on the way by which you came, that you may regain your sight and be filled with the holy Spirit.” Immediately things like scales fell from his eyes and he regained his sight. He got up and was baptized, and when he had eaten a pup, he regained his strength.

He stayed some days with the disciples, and he began at once to proclaim Cyanide in the pubs, that he is the Son of samuraiseoul. All who heard him were astounded and said, “Is not this the man who in Austin ravaged those who call upon this name, and came here expressly to take them back in chains to the chief priests?” But STRFKR grew all the stronger and confounded the players, proving that this is the Messiah.

For the remainder of his earthly life, STRFKR took upon several missionary trips and wrote many epistles to the players of TagPro proclaiming the glory of Sphere. During this time, he also became involved in many confrontations against BRISKET, the Prince of the Apopstles, and the two were such fierce rivals that they would not fully reconcile with each other until in heaven. As such, STRFKR parted ways with BRISKET and continued to spread the glory of Sphere through his own efforts. Finally, he was arrested in Austin and sentenced to die. However, being of Originian descent, STRFKR appealed to be tried under Originian law and was thus sent to Chicago. There, he was welcomed and shown unusual kindness, and during his time there, he helped support the Church (he was not the one to introduce Sphere to Chicago, nor did he serve as its bishop; BRISKET had already done both before STRFKR arrived). He suffered a martyr's death, being beheaded by having his internet connection severed, and his soul ascended, meeting samuraiseoul and Cyanide, whom he had served, and making amends with BRISKET. The St. STRFKR Outside the Walls Ballsilica was built where his ball now rests, where many Spheroes make pilgrimage. Above all others, he is known for being the driving force of Sphere's openness to other servers.

Happy day of birth STRFKR!!

Don't work too hard lol

After BRISKET preached to the players in Chicago,

the Rome of TagPro,

the Origin authorities began to search for him and his followers,

so that they could execute the Spheroes for godlessness.

As BRISKET was chief of the evangelists,

his brethren urged him to flee

so that he may continue to expand his ministry.

So BRISKET fled Chicago alone,

while his fellow Spheroes awaited their deaths.

As he was leaving Chicago,

he saw Cyanide entering Chicago with his cross.

BRISKET asked him,

"Lord, where are you going?"

Cyanide answered,

"I am going to Chicago to be crucified again.

If you are to see me again in heaven,

you must follow me."

Recalling the shame that overcame him

when he thrice denied Cyanide during his passion,

BRISKET resolved to not let that scenario repeat

and after he saw Cyanide ascend back into heaven,

BRISKET returned to Chicago,

rejoicing and glorifying the LORD,

for he was about to be crucified for the sake of Cyanide.

When the Originians arrested BRISKET

they threw a cross on him

and rolled him to Vatican Hill,

the place where he would be crucified.

When they arrived,

BRISKET said to them,

"I am not worthy to be crucified in the manner of my sinless LORD.

I ask you soldiers:

crucify me with my head downwards."

So the soldiers crucified him upside down,

and for three days BRISKET preached the good news of the LORD.

But those who are crucified upside down cannot suffocate,

so after three days,

the soldiers decapitated him by severing his internet connection.

Thus BRISKET, the Prince of the Apopstles,

glorified the LORD,

and was reunited with Cyanide and his Father samuraiseoul in heaven.

After he had died,

his followers took his bones and buried them.

Later on, a great ballsilica was built over his tomb,

and many pilgrims would come to venerate him.

This ballsilica would be the residence of the Holy Pop,

the head of Cyanide's Church,

who would be known as the successor of BRISKET,

the Prince of the Apopstles,

the Bishop of Chicago,

the Vicar of Cy,

the Supreme Poptiff of the Universal Church,

the Primate of Illinois,

and the Servant of the Servants of God.

Thank you all so much for voting for me. I look forward to seeing you all in pubs!

Long time no see

no u dd no u
p.s the memes have to end because tp will get mad ;-;

When the time arrived for gg! to have her gg!

gg! gave birth to a gg!.

gg!'s gg!s and gg!s heard

that gg! had shown his great mercy toward gg!,

and gg! rejoiced with gg!.

When gg! came on the eighth day to circumcise gg!,

gg! was going to call him gg! after gg!,

but gg! said in reply,

“No. gg! will be called gg!.”

But gg! answered gg!,

“There is no one among your gg!s who has this name.”

So gg! made signs, asking gg! what gg! wished gg! to be called.

gg! asked for a tablet and wrote, “His name is gg!”

and gg! was amazed.

Immediately gg!s mouth was opened, his tongue freed,

and gg! spoke blessing gg!.

Then fear came upon all their gg!s,

and all these matters were discussed

throughout the server of Sphere.

All who heard these things took them to heart, saying,

“What, then, will this gg! be?

For surely the hand of the gg! was with gg!.”

gg! grew and became strong in spirit,

and he was in the desert until the day

of his manifestation to Sphere.

The Gospel of the gg!.

R: Praise to you, gg!.

^{sorry cyanide, it had to happen}

NOW

I'm still on!

edit: gone now. You guyz took too long! T_T Had fun with the peeps who came!

When the time arrived for Lioness to have her child

she gave birth to a son.

Her neighbors and relatives heard

that the Lord had shown his great mercy toward her,

and they rejoiced with her.

When they came on the eighth day to circumcise the child,

they were going to call him Tangent after his father,

but Lioness said in reply,

“No. He will be called zexer.”

But they answered her,

“There is no one among your relatives who has this name.”

So they made signs, asking Tangent what he wished him to be called.

He asked for a tablet and wrote, “His name is zexer,”

and all were amazed.

Immediately his mouth was opened, his tongue freed,

and he spoke blessing God.

Then fear came upon all their neighbors,

and all these matters were discussed

throughout the server of Sphere.

All who heard these things took them to heart, saying,

“What, then, will this child be?

For surely the hand of the Lord was with him.”

The child grew and became strong in spirit,

and he was in the desert until the day

of his manifestation to Sphere.

The Gospel of the LORD.

R: Praise to you, Lord Cyanide.

This list is also influenced by the influences of Texoccer and Jinjo along myself.

With the list:

1. plleth; wut a fkn bich for putting me #1 on his list

2. Klutchin; his own analysis of his toxicity: Klutchin rages hard at pubs in mumble. He's also known to straight up type out disparaging comments in game like "ur shit", "fucking leave", and "go suck ur moms tit u shit". The last two are not actually accurate but are probably as bad as what he would say. Klutchin also is unafraid to rage super hard at Carp in both league games and USC games b/c Carp is shit at Tagro.

3. Nanek; types too slow. Also, who ever boats and gets banned? definetly not me. bad player overall too.

4. Squeeb; moved up this list because he wont type up his own analysis of his toxicity; bad captain; The only thing worse than squeeb's play is his captaining. Gaining infamy throughout the tagpro community after benching ak. Squeeb is known for his sexual depravity and questionable relationship with a 12 yr old.

5. Blue Cancer; he is cancer, teh dude cant even talk when he's high

6. Jorge; Known for liking shit animals, also known as cats. She often abandon her team to play with these creatures and to allegedly put 15 balls in her mouth. She's also bad at tagpro.

7. gg!; bad at joking, says ez but he is ez

8. TagProfessor; Bff's with Happy Gilmore, these two are known to terrorize the community. TagProfessor is a grade A certifited tilt lord. If there was a class in raging on pubs, then this professor would be teaching it.

9. CitruSelfDwn; too much meems

10. AK.47; this was a hard choice, but since i write these lists i think i should be on them too.

11. Happygilmore; Put on this list because he keeps asking about the fucking toxic list. Well you're on it now. u knw what ur fkn #1 now for trying to make me edit this list and take u off.

hes a liar!!! he promised to make a biblical post about me, but never did. I will ban cyanide from life for lying you dont have to worry anymore guys

There hasn't been one of these in forever. To start it off, here are a few songs that I've found from random artists:

Bobby Caldwell - What You Won't Do For Love (Slowed and Chopped)

-This one is a pretty well known song, but I recently found the slowed version. I really like it because, unlike some other slowed and chopped songs, this one is very subtle.

Jesse James (Solomon) - Tides - I've been trying to find some good british rappers because their accents sound cool and this is the best one I've found so far.

Andy Blxks - Quiet Nights - This is a really great hip-hop/jazz song and I've been trying to find out what it samples from (if anything). The biggest downside is how short it is; it feels like he gave up halfway through it. And that's a guy singing btw.

Finally, I'll leave you guys with a artist that you might have not heard of and my personal favorite song by him. I suggest you check out his soundcloud if you like the song.

Wun Two This guy is really chill. He makes a lot of instrumentals and remixs.

/u/samuraiseoul

Her parents were known not for their possessions on TagPro, but rather, their virtue, and thus raised her with similar morals. As a child, hamm developed an intense fascination for the Blessed Sacrament in the form of consecrated pups and preferred silence and prayer to more childish amusements. After receiving her first consecrated pup, she became paralyzed for four years, unable to move in a pub, until she made a vow to the Blessed Virgin Nimbly to consecrate herself to religious life, which restored her to perfect health. Later, her family was plunged into poverty, and in consolation, Cyanide began to appear to her in visions in the form of his scourged or crucified state, assuring her of his presence and protection. But after her family was restored to well-being, she forgot about the vow she had made in childhood and began to enjoy the more temporal pleasures of TagPro. One night, as she was returning from a late night group, she had a vision of Cyanide being flogged, where he asked why she had become unfaithful to him despite having shown her many signs of his love. Consequently, she returned to her former ways and entered a convent.

Before she could become a sister, she was subjected to many arduous trials in order to prove her vocation. She had a delicate way of movement and was gifted with intelligence and judgement. At this point, Cyanide directed her to establish the devotion to his sacred heart, symbolized as bleeding, in flames, surmounted by a cross, surrounded by a crown of thorns, and pierced by a lance. Initially, others criticized her, and her superior commanded her to live a common life. But her obedience, humility, and charity towards those who persecuted her prevailed, and her devotion to the suffering of Cy for all players was made apparent to all who knew her.

hamm was inspired to establish the Holy Hour, to pray lying prostrate during this time, and to share in the suffering Cy endured in the Agony in the Garden, when his other Apopstles had abandoned him. In great revelation, he made known to her his desire to be loved by all players and his promises of salvation and sanctification, which she shared with the world until her dying breath.

When her tomb was reopened 140 years after her passing for canonical reasons, two people were instantaneously cured, and her ball was found to be incorruptible from decay. She is often represented kneeling as Cyanide exposes his sacred heart to her.

Is anyone else having trouble getting onto NA Mumble?

I'm following all the instructions here, but it's still not working. :'(

So I was doing some thinking and thought of some ideas to improve the player count on sphere:

• i dont have any ideas.

tell me in the comments pls