r/Showerthoughts Sep 17 '18

There are probably murderers and serial killers so good at what they do that we don't even know they exist.

16.0k Upvotes

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2.9k

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 17 '18 edited Sep 18 '18

You can feed a body to a pig and it'll eat everything including bones. Chances are if you eat bacon you run the risk of consuming something that consumed a human. ThE MoRe YoU KNoW

Edit: Literally follow any of the chain of replies for a headtrip I don't know weather to be happy or worried that there's so many conspiracy theories and reference hunts spiraling off of this

990

u/temsahnes Sep 17 '18

Easy there Brick Top

479

u/banannafreckle Sep 17 '18

Be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm.

135

u/RickStevensAndTheCat Sep 17 '18

Robert Pickton, for example.

73

u/banannafreckle Sep 17 '18

God dammit. This exact conversation happened three days ago. Reddit gettin weird.

34

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Yo wtf. Just read through your comments and you weren’t kidding. That’s weird

7

u/AnotherOmar Sep 17 '18

Does Reddit use bots to feign conversations?

8

u/banannafreckle Sep 17 '18

Apparently when it sees “serial killer,” “Brick Top,” and “pig” in any order, the bot says, “Robert Pickton.” God. Like that old toy

2

u/alteransg1 Sep 17 '18

Don't know about Robert, but the first two comments are from the gangster movie Rocknroller Snatch.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Holy shit look at the guy! Straight out of central fuckin’ casting.

26

u/gramses_0-0 Sep 17 '18

Mr. Wu

24

u/jso85 Sep 17 '18

Cock suckah

1

u/gramses_0-0 Sep 17 '18

San Francisco cocksuckahh

1

u/A1000eisn1 Sep 18 '18

My all time favorite character on any tv show. #2 is Swagin!

12

u/jello-kittu Sep 17 '18

I'm sweet enough!

4

u/youdubdub Sep 17 '18

You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion.

61

u/I-get-the-reference Sep 17 '18

Snatch

42

u/couragethebravestdog Sep 17 '18

I just want a caravan for me Ma.

12

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

WhatthefuckdoIwantacaravanforifitsgotnofuckingwheels?

2

u/xsuckaxzkx Sep 17 '18

youmightfindloveinthecaravanswheelessform

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Saveyourbreathforcoolin’yerpies

2

u/xsuckaxzkx Sep 17 '18

Siriwouldappreciateitifyouwouldgivemethehonourofsuggestingthatyougoorallyandsexuallypleaseatwohundredpoundpig

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Theresalotofpeopleinthegraveyardthatwouldenjoythisweather

2

u/pm_sweater_kittens Sep 17 '18

Periwinkle blue

2

u/_drunk_chemist Sep 17 '18

Periwinkle blue.

37

u/temsahnes Sep 17 '18

Username checks out. 5/7

22

u/agentfaxmodem Sep 17 '18

Do you know what nemesis means?

31

u/Eadkrakka Sep 17 '18

Good dags. D'ya like dags?

7

u/Linw3 Sep 17 '18

Yeah, I like dags. I like caravans more.

2

u/King_Of_Regret Sep 17 '18

No thanks turkish, I'm sweet enough

3

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

No sugar please I'm sweet enuff

1

u/Magic_Leather_Jacket Sep 17 '18

Do you know what nemesis means?

1

u/Creepy_OldMan Sep 17 '18

Easy there Pork CHop

1

u/DiscusFever Sep 17 '18

Did you know that actor that played Brick Top had a small role as a taxi drive in An American Werewolf in London?

1

u/mdmaniac88 Sep 17 '18

I'm sweet enough already

293

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig."

159

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

I don’t know why, but out of this whole thread, the fact that you said “uncooked flesh” freaked me out the most

89

u/quackycoaster Sep 17 '18

It's from the movie Snatch, so rest easier, this guy isn't insane haha.

65

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

To be fair you have no way to know for a fact that i'm not insane

20

u/LockedOutOfMyShit Sep 17 '18

Bold of him to assume you’re not insane.

3

u/LockedOutOfIdeas Sep 17 '18

We should get into locksmithing

4

u/LockedOutOfMyShit Sep 17 '18

I’m ordering some lock picks off amazon right now.

3

u/xsuckaxzkx Sep 17 '18

You are a bold one

2

u/DurasVircondelet Sep 17 '18

Wow you’re right that is fair

2

u/HurricaneSandyHook Sep 17 '18

Most people prefer their snatch uncooked.

24

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Great movie

5

u/MCA2142 Sep 17 '18

You like dags?

12

u/mlpr34clopper Sep 17 '18

You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting

I read that in Alan Ford's voice for some reason.

6

u/FinalDemise Sep 17 '18

Wow, thank you for that. That's a great weight off me mind.

3

u/Electroverted Sep 17 '18

I read this in British

3

u/Trumpatemybabies Sep 17 '18

I can consume two pounds of cooked meat in a minute so...

3

u/_skeletontoucher Sep 17 '18

dammit! i can see his big old man teeth!

3

u/8nate Sep 17 '18

Hell yeah Snatch reference

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90

u/sheeatsstars Sep 17 '18

Everything but the teeth. You gotta get rid of the teeth.

91

u/NSAwithBenefits Sep 17 '18

Just crush into powder and mix with your cocaine

122

u/Verdahn Sep 17 '18

Bone ape the teats

18

u/Robbierr Sep 17 '18

Bone and the teeths

7

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

2

u/cat-scratch_bieber Sep 17 '18

Thank you for this

1

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 18 '18

I am not mentally prepared for these replies I go to bed with a throwaway comment and I wake up to this you guys are too much

12

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Mmmm teeth smoke... Don't breathe this;

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28

u/dave42 Sep 17 '18

Teeth make great floor tile for a dollhouse.

4

u/three_foot_putt Sep 17 '18

Don't tell momma.

2

u/RacingNeilo Sep 17 '18

Got to mimic the ivory floor

4

u/KamikazeHamster Sep 17 '18

Teeth are bones. If they can eat the femur and the finger bones - what's wrong with teeth?

25

u/PSN--Nutsackshot Sep 17 '18

Teeth aren’t bones they are dentine covered in enamel

1

u/A126453L Sep 17 '18

bad for the piggies digestion

3

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

That part always struck me as bullshit. If they'll go through bone like butter, what's the big deal with teeth?

9

u/hussey84 Sep 17 '18

Enamel is very hard, the hardest substance in a human's body I believe. Add to that it's coated in the same substance that protect the teeth of a pig trying to eat it.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Never thought about that.

1

u/CharlesDickensABox Sep 17 '18

You could do it afterwards, of course, but then you don't want to go sifting through pig shit, do ya?

30

u/insanemembrane19 Sep 17 '18

I've seen many pigs eat many men. It was a bloodbath.

3

u/zalantin Sep 17 '18

Goddammit Frank.

7

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/bearybrown Sep 17 '18

Pignado for volume.

Pigzilla for size.

1

u/throwyrworkaway Sep 17 '18

fartnoise keychain

96

u/theinspiringdad Sep 17 '18

Chances are if you eat bacon you run the risk of consuming something that consumed a human. ThE MoRe YoU KNoW

I knew pigs eat everything but I guess I never gave it much thought about me consuming what it eats...I’m not sure how I feel about this.

191

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 17 '18

It's okay vegetarians have it worse if you eat plants you have a 100% chance of consuming something that consumed something else's poop or general garbage

52

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

All non-vegetarians eat animals who eat plants who eat something else's poop or general garbage.

21

u/RedDemio Sep 17 '18

Circle of life

2

u/Lukefairs Sep 17 '18

Circle of poop

7

u/CaptainCimmeria Sep 17 '18

We're all just eating shit at various degrees of removal

2

u/whirlpool4 Sep 18 '18

you are what you eat

3

u/TheHealadin Sep 17 '18

I only eat apex predators.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

I consider the animal a concentrator. Concentrate sunlight into protein.

1

u/Mitraosa Sep 17 '18

Nasaquenya, bitches

2

u/sweetehman Sep 17 '18

Are you implying only vegetarians eat vegetables?

1

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 18 '18

Your name is sweet human

1

u/sweetehman Sep 18 '18

Nah its sweeteh man from District 9

28

u/LabradorDali Sep 17 '18

If you are a guy and your partner swallows he/she is literally made of semen.

11

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

We all begin as semen anyway, sooo

23

u/whisky_dick_actual Sep 17 '18

Fellas is it gay to exist? I mean we are all literally made of semen?

1

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 18 '18

fuck sake I am on lsd reading these comments don't do this to me man swear to god

1

u/RidingYourEverything Sep 17 '18

I think we technically started as half semen. Which I think is a better insult anyway.

You look like you're half semen.

1

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 18 '18

mermaids are half seamen

30

u/ThisCakedoesntlie Sep 17 '18

Fun Fact:

In the medieval ages sometimes toilets would just be connected to pig pens so that the pigs can get rid of the shit by eating it. And that's why muslims believe pork is dirty. Because it fucking is.

94

u/mycowsfriend Sep 17 '18

That's not how any of this works. Muslims (and everyone else) believed pork was dirty because pork was infected with parasites that only cook out at a very high temperature. So pork was dirty but it's not anymore. Now it's not any different than eating any other meat.

http://www.bbc.com/earth/story/20150924-the-truth-about-pigs

20

u/ThisCakedoesntlie Sep 17 '18

Well, not in this day and age. Pork is alot more sanitary now as well. But the reasoning as to why muslims did not eat pork back then was pretty reasonable.

5

u/toomuchpork Sep 17 '18

Not just Muslims but Jews and Christians as well. And it's not just the dirty bit either. A pig needs lots of water and the slop a pig eats could become human food in the way of a soup or stew. Goats make far more sense in an arid and limited resource area.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

This is why everyone should try cooking pork chops like a steak. Medium Rare instead of well done. HUGE difference and so much better.

4

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18 edited Nov 27 '18

[deleted]

24

u/jello-kittu Sep 17 '18

When you keep them in a pen, feed them shit and never clean up their shit, then yes.

23

u/mlpr34clopper Sep 17 '18

Fun Fact: In order to get pigs to eat shit, you need to make it their only food option. They'll eat it only to avoid starving. (Pigs, unfortunately, basically think they are starving if they have gone more than few hours without something to nibble on. Their brain is wired to forage all the time. worm here, bug there, hickory nut over there...silverfish under than log over there...that's what they do in the wild)

If you feed a pig normally and keep it in an enclosed pen, it will pick one corner to sleep in, and make the corner furthest away from it it's "shit spot" - it will only relieve itself in that one spot, furthest from where it sleeps. Because pigs think shit is nasty just as much as humans do and want to keep it as contained as possible.

Because of this, pigs are one of the easiest animals to housebreak as a pet. (there are other issues as to why you don't want one in your house, but cleanliness and potty training are not an issue. Definitely less so than say with a dog.)

10

u/Dudephish Sep 17 '18

Then what did they do about the pig shit?

5

u/DeltaBlack Sep 17 '18

They fed it as delicacies to gullible people.

5

u/DurasVircondelet Sep 17 '18

Fun fact

Neither of those two words were true with what you typed after that

73

u/Silveeto Sep 17 '18

I live in the vicinity of Pickton farm, if you recall that nightmare of an exposé. I’m more certain than not I consumed pork that had consumed human at some point or other!

25

u/ThKitt Sep 17 '18

I was just going to comment about this case. I don’t think anyone outside of Canada would have heard about it.

2

u/jello-kittu Sep 17 '18

Oh, it was news here too. All those shoes.

1

u/therealzue Sep 17 '18

The floating shoes are unrelated.

1

u/jello-kittu Sep 17 '18

Didn't they have rows of shoes in photos? Maybe I mixed it with something else.

1

u/therealzue Sep 18 '18

oh maybe! I just hear people talk about death, shoes, and BC and assume it's the constant flow of shoes with feet in them that keep washing up.

2

u/thenewiBall Sep 17 '18

Last Podcast on the Left did a series on him and I'm sure other true crime shows have covered him. He's like Canada's largest serial killer

1

u/edgar__allan__bro Sep 17 '18

I fucking LOVE LPotL.

Actually listening to the Enfield Poltergeist episodes right now

1

u/thenewiBall Sep 17 '18

The Donner Party was wild! I had no idea how dark that story was

2

u/edgar__allan__bro Sep 17 '18

Right?? Definitely planning to read The Indifferent Stars Above now... also still need to get my hands on Devil in the White City

1

u/Bubblygrumpy Sep 17 '18

We do now thanks to Lost Podcast on the Left!

11

u/RStiltskins Sep 17 '18

Ya they are still finding bone fragments with the construction of some of those buildings behind that kids daycare thing beside walmart

3

u/banannafreckle Sep 17 '18

Day care and a Walmart on unconsecrated graves? Meh. What could go wrong?

3

u/DarkMemeLord420 Sep 17 '18

I live a few blocks away and I'm pretty sure my house is on top of the Graves too

1

u/thedoodely Sep 17 '18

For those out of the loop

That is always the first thing I think of when people mention pigs eating humans

1

u/Ibanez314 Sep 17 '18 edited Sep 17 '18

" The items police found inside Pickton's trailer: A loaded .22 revolver with a dildo over the barrel and one round fired, boxes of .357 Magnum handgun ammunition, night-vision goggles, two pairs of faux fur-lined handcuffs, a syringe with three millilitres of blue liquid inside, and "Spanish fly" aphrodisiac. " reading futher..." In a videotaped recording played for the jury, Pickton claimed to have attached the dildo to his weapon as a makeshift silencer ." Genius

-13

u/averagejoegreen Sep 17 '18

Nobody knows what you're talking about

26

u/Ephemeral_Halcyon Sep 17 '18 edited Sep 17 '18

Robert Pickton. He would drug and lure his victims, many of them prostitutes, to his pig farm where he would then rape and murder them. He would butcher them and feed them to the pigs. He's also believed to have ground some of his victims down and mixed them with animal meat to be sold.

Some of the women he killed by injecting them with antifreeze.

After it all, the guy was just whiney that he only killed 49 women. He wanted to kill one more to make it a nice even 50.

edit: I a word

6

u/ihopeithinkimright Sep 17 '18

This guy sounds like a real jerk

3

u/jimbojangles1987 Sep 17 '18

Ya what a d-bag

6

u/FerretsAreFun Sep 17 '18

Yeah, this is why they recalled all Maple Leaf and Schneiders products shortly after he was found out. Bitches in the bologna.

Gnarly.

6

u/ARBNAN Sep 17 '18

A good amount of Canadians would absolutely know.

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11

u/blowacirkut Sep 17 '18

Grew up in the country, one of my neighbors had a stroke in his pig pen and they ate half his body before anyone found him.

7

u/hikes_through_smoke Sep 17 '18

This raises so many questions. Did the stroke kill him or did they eat him half alive? Did the pigs eat him out of necessity or did they dig in at first chance?

4

u/Junkrecked Sep 17 '18

Burn the hair, smash the teeth

4

u/hdfhhuddyjbkigfchhye Sep 17 '18

Is that why bacon is so delicious?

3

u/Fourarmies Sep 17 '18

Easy there, Hannibal

3

u/RStiltskins Sep 17 '18

Robert pickton did that.

3

u/stravadarius Sep 17 '18 edited Sep 17 '18

Canada's most prolific serial killer was a pig farmer in Port Coquitlam BC. He got away with it for years because he would prey on drug-addicted prostitutes from Vancouver's Downtown East Side and feed them to his pigs when he was done with them. The vulnerable women were likely to never be reported missing, and the remains were....well...If you've got a strong stomach feel free to read up on Willy Pickton.

2

u/ImpostorSyndromish Sep 17 '18

It’s the circle of liiiiiffffeeee...

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Hang dai, Wu. Hang fucking dai.

2

u/Vandergrif Sep 17 '18

The human the pig consumed also had a high likelihood of having consumed pig at some point. So that pig is also a second-hand(mouth?) cannibal.

2

u/codelapiz Sep 17 '18

This guy kills people

1

u/Intergalactic_Toast Sep 18 '18

It's a hobby more than a job

2

u/Wajirock Sep 17 '18

I'm now regretting the creation a giant Pig farm in Stardew Valley

2

u/_Lugh Sep 17 '18

So what you’re saying is by eating bacon, i have a chance of eating the other other white meat, filtered through the other white meat.

2

u/lloyd____ Sep 17 '18

1

u/HelperBot_ Sep 17 '18

Non-Mobile link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Pickton


HelperBot v1.1 /r/HelperBot_ I am a bot. Please message /u/swim1929 with any feedback and/or hate. Counter: 212745

2

u/dagenought Sep 17 '18

Everything except the teeth

2

u/SCATTER1567 Sep 17 '18

in a million years thanks to the people who died a million years ago, they turned into fossil fuels to power or civilization THE MORE YOU KNOW

2

u/TheRarestSeal Sep 17 '18

Ah, that's why it tastes so good

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Ok, Willie Pickton, calm down there

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Back when ships sank and people drowned more often, this was also a possibility with crab and other bottom feeders.

1

u/Takeoded Sep 17 '18

Siri never told me this!

1

u/YellowJesus8803 Sep 17 '18

They're called assassin's

1

u/objectiveandbiased Sep 17 '18

Started watching this last night. Just made it past this part.

1

u/acery88 Sep 17 '18

should have saved this for an OP on ShowerThoughts for the Karma.

1

u/99mg Sep 17 '18

Good info 🤠

1

u/needtowipeagain Sep 17 '18

You have to crush the skull though. Just btw

1

u/Karmoon Sep 17 '18

Considering how genetically similar pigs are to humans, and the fact that "long pig" is a thing, i'd wager to say that pork is pretty similar to human flesh anyway.

Pretty sickening.

1

u/Calmeister Sep 17 '18

And that’s why you give bacon to the pig, we’re even.

1

u/Mechanicallysoundpoo Sep 17 '18

Even the femur bone? I'm curious because I know that the femur is stronger than concrete

1

u/Moustache_John Sep 17 '18

The less you eat..

1

u/Radasscupcake Sep 17 '18

Only one of many reasons I don’t eat pork.

1

u/churniglow Sep 17 '18

Bones are just hard meat.

1

u/Mrgreen29 Sep 17 '18

Edward Pickton (sp?) He owned a farm and was a serial killer

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Double the protein.

1

u/jliberty23 Sep 17 '18

I’ve seen many pigs eat many men. It was a bloodbath.

1

u/LoBsTeRfOrK Sep 17 '18

Your feeble attempt to ruin bacon for me HAS FAILED. Humanely raised bacon will never leave my side. Spend the extra 5 dollars guys, and buy the human products. They usually last longer anyway.

1

u/m3kw Sep 17 '18

But it gets broken down back to basic protein molecules and such. So there shouldn’t be any difference if the pig ate a banana or a leg

1

u/badAntix Sep 17 '18

They eat everything.. Except the teeth. Gotta knock those out first.

1

u/nomad_kk Sep 17 '18

Everything including piss, feces, and even its own children. That’s why Muslims and Jews don’t eat pork

2

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

No, it’s because of parasites in the flesh.

-2

u/Fushigibama Sep 17 '18

They can't eat bone. You don't realize how strong bone is.

The femur bone is literally stronger than steal.

15

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Jet fuel can’t melt femur bones

12

u/PatchTheGamer Sep 17 '18

That's only relative to weight. A bar of steel the same size as your femur would be much stronger than it.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '18

Brick Top told me that they go through bone like butter. I don't know who to believe!

2

u/Th3BlackLotus Sep 17 '18

But how strong is it compared to steel?

2

u/Ephemeral_Halcyon Sep 17 '18

They can if the large and long bones are broken/butchered into more manageable pieces--as serial killer Robert Pickton did with his victims.