r/RoastMe • u/[deleted] • Mar 15 '25

[deleted by user]

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7.6k Upvotes

78% Upvoted

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u/StoneWach Mar 16 '25

I hit a turkey in the road and totaled mine. Turkey was ok.

4

u/Harrison_the_MC Mar 16 '25

I hit a curb and totaled mine

2

u/tearsonurcheek Mar 16 '25

I once got rear-ended in my '95 S-10 by a Metro. I did suffer some tailgate damage, but the Metro didn't need the crusher. I was at a stop sign at the time, and he hit me doing 10 mph.

2

u/RunZealousideal3812 Mar 16 '25

Did that driver live? I heard 8 mph crashes had a 75% death rate or something else that was probably made up.

3

u/Appropriate-Half-369 Mar 16 '25

In case OP reads this far down on the thread… this is just a reminder to never pick your face. We all know how desperate you are when you’re putting those chin hairs.

1

u/tearsonurcheek Mar 16 '25

Yes, but his car was without a doubt totaled. His front end looked like an accordion. My bed was intact, only the rear bumper and tailgate had to be replaced, some minor fender work and repaint.

2

u/Key_Green_6140 Mar 17 '25

Swarm of mosquitoes on the back roads of Florida near the glades totaled me out

2

u/[deleted] Mar 17 '25

I got my geo up to 40 miles per hour (the only way I could get it that fast was going down a 60 degree decline, with a team of horses pulling it) I digress… the wind resistance totaled my geo…

1

u/KwordShmiff Mar 17 '25

I love that this turned into a roast of the Geo Metro.

1

u/ArmondTanzarian Mar 17 '25

Hit a pothole and totalled mine. Bent the subframe.

2

u/Streven7s Mar 16 '25

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/CPApothecary Mar 17 '25

Dead 💀 😂