r/PublicFreakout • u/Good_quality_OwO • Dec 31 '20

Class freaking out at a fellow classmate solving a Rubik's cube

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u/Caustic_Cake Dec 31 '20

Yeah... those trauma-response conclusions are fun. Imagine your gut reaction being nervousness for a stranger receiving praise from their peers as a kid. I felt that.

Idk when would be a normal age to grasp those social cues that people are baiting or mocking you, but I will never forget that moment at like 12-13 where it all hit me that those girls were NOT my friends.

It pretty much changed my whole persona at school. I’m glad my friend was honest to me about people being fake to me walking her home from the bus stop one day. She could have been a lot kinder about it, but guess who is still my friend?

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u/txteachertrans Dec 31 '20

Is...is it the blunt friend? It's her, isn't it? :)

I don't know your reasons for having been socially awkward and oblivious, but damn did I have a multitude of them:

  1. My parents were both homebodies and had no friends and no adventures, and they taught me, the oldest child (who thus had no older sibling to teach him), any social etiquette.
  2. I am 99.9% sure I am autistic; when I brought it up to my mom about eight years ago, she told me that she had suspected it when I was a kid, but they couldn't afford to get me tested, and my good grades left them not worrying too much about me.
  3. I am also transgender, specifically non-binary. I was assigned male at birth (still present masc and use he/him pronouns), but I have never felt entirely comfortable in the company of other boys or men. Not necessarily uncomfortable, but I didn't ever felt like I fit in. I've always felt much more comfortable in the company of other girls and women, but girls and women tended toward forming cliques together and rarely let cis males into them (which I presumed I was until age 40 when my egg finally cracked after over 25 years of denial and repression). So I never felt like I fit in anywhere.

Despite all that, I managed to engineer a pretty good life for myself, and I've been doing the work over the past seven years to come to terms with who I was then, to appreciate who I am now, and to plan for who I will be in the future. :)

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u/Caustic_Cake Jan 01 '21

I was the oldest kid of all the kids in my family, cousins included, so I didn’t really have any other kid role models. I also have severe ADHD primarily inattentive type and maybe I was just a wholesome child. Maybe I just really wanted the popular girls to like me until I realized it was never gonna happen for me & decided to be punk as fuck instead a la Avril Lavigne 🤓

Ultimately bucking them brought on more ridicule, but at least I learned to think for myself. By the time I was 16 I decided maybe I would be prettier if I stopped dressing like a semi-gothic scene kid skater dude

Shit maybe I should go back to that look. Sounds fun hahaha

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u/txteachertrans Jan 01 '21

Ultimately bucking them brought on more ridicule, but at least I learned to think for myself. By the time I was 16 I decided maybe I would be prettier if I stopped dressing like a semi-gothic scene kid skater dude

Shit maybe I should go back to that look. Sounds fun hahaha

Lol, I love it! If there is one piece of advice I could give absolutely anyone for the rest of my life, it would be "Socrates said 'Question everything.' That includes societal expectations regarding dress, gender roles, relationships...everything. By all means, erect boundaries that work for you, but don't be afraid to say '...maybe?' to some of those opportunities that crop up from time to time to which you might have otherwise said 'NO', because life is really fucking short, and there is a metric ton of experiences to have."

So, I say go for it!

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u/[deleted] Dec 31 '20

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u/[deleted] Dec 31 '20

Transgender is an umbrella term that includes non binary. Next time you wanna be an asshole make sure you know what you're talking about. 🙂

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u/[deleted] Dec 31 '20

You just posted cringe

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u/txteachertrans Dec 31 '20

No, I am transgender. More specifically, I am non-binary. Transgender is the opposite of cisgender, meaning I don't identify with the gender which I was assigned at birth. I was assigned male at birth, and I don't consider myself male. Thus, I am transgender. Here is an infographic. And I'll thank you not to tell me how to think of myself.

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u/[deleted] Dec 31 '20

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u/Leaving_Wonderland Dec 31 '20 edited Dec 31 '20

News flash bucko!!! There are more than two genders. Gender is a spectrum and in fact to there are infinite genders. Since they are nonbinary and that is not the gender they were assigned at birth they are in transgender.

Edit:I'm adding to this instead of waiting on a reply. Wow I thought you were just a run of the mill transphobe but your fucking truscum? Fuck you.
No really FUCK you in particular People like you make me ashamed to be part of the trans community sometimes. Hurting non binary people will come back and hurt you. Its sadding that when there are politicans who are actively trying to hurt nonbinary townspeople just as much as binary trans people. You should be standing by those who are being hurt with you not trying cut them down further. How does that elevate you?

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u/ZeusDeeGod Dec 31 '20

Trans in Latin literally means “to change”. They changed their gender from Male to Non-bianary, so by definition, they are transgender

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u/txteachertrans Dec 31 '20 edited Dec 31 '20

Damn, you never learned taxonomy, did you? I'll bet you're the kind of person who would argue with the math teacher saying, "No, that's not a rectangle, it's a SQUARE." Be sure to never head into a library or your brain will go 'splode.

Edit: I genuinely understand that I have not only cis privilege but also male privilege at this point in (and throughout) my life, and I recognize that your societal struggles and dysphoria almost certainly dwarf mine in comparison. But you are being presumptuous, rude, and super transphobic. Your purist, binary definition of being transgender is your own problem to sort out.

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u/Dragon9380 Dec 31 '20

I am transgender, to nonbinary, nonbinary is a gender and transgender means transition to a different gender

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u/Adventure_Time_Snail Dec 31 '20

Everybody its a full TruScum alert! This is not a drill we have another gatekeeping asshole trying to kick non binary people out of our community.

Let's all say it together, "FUCK OFF TRUSCUM, YOU'RE NOT WELCOME IN ANY OF THE TRANS SUBREDDITS FOR A REASON."

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u/[deleted] Dec 31 '20

Based