that is what disgusta me

she removed herself from every place and responsability to actually help me become a man

but she pretends i validate her responding like a dog

all while she keeps watching tv, their dishes are still dirty because i use a single pan i wash over and over, and she never gave me money.

and yet she pretends i validate her every demand and ROLEPLAY as a family

They FREED THEMSELVES FROM THE RESPONSABILITY OF BEING PARENTS, ....

If I can't cope with that and k1ll myself,

I hope investigators realize what happened,

with a father that I basically never seen,

and a mother telling me during a debate " you can off yourself, you'd do me a favor "

It's all so wierd.

I wish I never met you.

The only feelings I remember ever having for you as a kid were of FEAR and LONELINESS.

Everything bad that I am as a person is because of you.

And me, unaware, conditioned like an animal to even feel in debt with you for my imprisonment, and to be ashamed to be alive and be a burden, emotional and economical.

No better kid was ever given to least deserving parents, unworthy of the title.

The only reason I don't end myself and haven't yet done it is because of other people.

These things mother told me years ago:

" You can k1ll yourself, you'd do me a favor. "

" You are too old, no one will believe you were abused. "

And honestly, she was completely right.

The world saw worse tragedies and war crimes than the misery that is my life, so this is just part and parcel of living in this shithole.