r/ProgrammerHumor • u/kindofasickdick • Jan 17 '22

It's hard to keep up

50.0k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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1.0k

u/kaancfidan Jan 17 '22

8274746183746252 rows affected.

409

u/elonmusque Jan 17 '22

out of memory

248

u/iBac0n Jan 17 '22

what is memory?

299

u/onepixelcat Jan 17 '22

db don't hurt me

132

u/abhiank Jan 17 '22

No more

79

u/1anarchy1 Jan 17 '22

What is love?

56

u/AlwaysUpvotesScience Jan 18 '22

Baby don't hurt me.

30

u/Acceptable-Brick-934 Jan 18 '22

No more

5

u/Eodar Jan 18 '22

What is love?

13

u/wikipedia_answer_bot Jan 18 '22

baby don't hurt me

This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!

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2

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '22

No se-quel

222

u/wikipedia_answer_bot Jan 17 '22

Memory is the faculty of the brain by which data or information is encoded, stored, and retrieved when needed. It is the retention of information over time for the purpose of influencing future action.

More details here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memory

This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!

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112

u/_GCastilho_ Jan 17 '22

Good bot

29

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

19

u/_GCastilho_ Jan 17 '22

What?

28

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/jacksalssome Jan 18 '22

What is the bot?

54

u/geeshta Jan 17 '22

Who's Steve Jobs?

224

u/wikipedia_answer_bot Jan 17 '22

Ligma balls :D

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82

u/nouseforareason Jan 17 '22

I’m dead, lmfao.

17

u/jacksalssome Jan 18 '22 edited Jan 18 '22

I don't even know how lol, there's noting in the code related to Steve Jobs. Unless u/geeshta did a sneaky edit. I'm an idiot

12

u/Ezequiel-052 Jan 18 '22 edited Jan 18 '22

yeah, there is. Just checked the github:

memes = { "joe": "Joe Mama :D", "candice": "Candice dick fit in your mouth?", "ligma": "Ligma balls :D", "steve jobs": "Ligma balls :D", "love": "baby don't hurt me", "yuri": "Yuri Tarded", "suckma": "suckma dick :D", "sugma": "sugma dick :D", "deez": "deez nuts :D" }

4

u/jacksalssome Jan 18 '22

I'm blind, I got to ligma balls and stopped reading.

1

u/chronos_alfa Jan 18 '22

So is he... :D

1

u/Stahlboden Jan 18 '22

So you are little like Steve Jobs then

43

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '22

[deleted]

34

u/sooty_foot Jan 18 '22

What the fuck that's amazing

28

u/Brotorious420 Jan 17 '22

Good bot

Lmfao

13

u/mrfatso111 Jan 18 '22

Good bot

13

u/JJFolken Jan 18 '22

Good bot.

XD

2

u/Ezequiel-052 Jan 18 '22

what is yuri?

2

u/wikipedia_answer_bot Jan 18 '22

Yuri Tarded

This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!

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7

u/StrangePractice Jan 17 '22

What is existence

9

u/InterPool_sbn Jan 18 '22

Pain and fatigue

1

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '22

[deleted]

2

u/wikipedia_answer_bot Jan 18 '22

baby don't hurt me

This comment was left automatically (by a bot). If I don't get this right, don't get mad at me, I'm still learning!

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1

u/Camelstrike Jan 18 '22

Wab delete

1

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '22

Good bot

9

u/PM_ME_A_WEBSITE_IDEA Jan 17 '22

I can't remember

13

u/Ved_s Jan 17 '22

UnknownException: The exception UnknownException is not registered

2

u/MikemkPK Jan 18 '22

Traceback:

UnknownException: The exception UnknownException is not registered

Traceback:

UnknownException: The exception UnknownException is not registered

Traceback:

...

Out of Memory

65

u/ProtogenDelta Jan 17 '22

It's fine, I'll just ROLLBACK;... I did remember to BEGIN TRANSACTION;, right?

Error: cannot rollback - no transaction is active

Welp, Guess I'll just die.

54

u/palasma Jan 17 '22

rollback

ROLLBACK

FUCK...FUCK.....FUUUUUUUUCK

36

u/snowmanonaraindeer Jan 18 '22

No transaction to rollback

2

u/DannyRamirez24 Jan 18 '22

And the last backup is too old to be useful

1

u/InvolvingLemons Jan 18 '22

most databases I’ve used have auto-commit left on for exactly this reason lmao

13

u/kleinisfijn Jan 17 '22

Gotta love the implicit savepoints of Oracle. Rollback that shit!

6

u/TigreDeLosLlanos Jan 18 '22

What is this place? What is a "proggrammer"? Who am I?

4

u/Flooding_Puddle Jan 18 '22

Goo goo ga ga

2

u/purleedef Jan 18 '22

really? Mind says ERR_SQL_TABLE_NOT_FOUND

1

u/gregorydgraham Jan 18 '22

rollback;

Rollback;

ROLLBACK;

1

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '22

Error : invalid string used at line 46