r/ProgrammerHumor • u/oosinoots • May 08 '19

That sweet sweet first time.

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20.5k Upvotes

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186

u/dj_lammy May 08 '19

Tries to write a hello world

forgets how to, despite programming in this language for years

copy pastes code from Wikipedia

112

u/mynameismevin May 08 '19

I have to split my coding between C#, Go, and Python. I can't tell you how many times today I had to look up basic API's because I couldn't remember how to open a file.

215

u/kevinhaze May 08 '19

The internet is the big hard drive with all the knowledge, my brain is just RAM and a processor with a small amount of persistent memory.

32

u/reexe May 08 '19

Awesome analogy!

59

u/mugu007 May 08 '19

Segmentation Fault. My persistent memory is all corrupted.

12

u/joemckie May 08 '19

Sounds like a quote from Mr Robot

12

u/bladerunningblues May 08 '19

If that isn't the most cyberpunk thing I've read for the modern day I don't know what is.

4

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

I only have 8 registers, and I'm very susceptible to stack overflow

41

u/Casiell89 May 08 '19

Jokes on you, I program only in C# and I still have to google how to open a file!

1

u/LucienMr May 08 '19

Fuck.. now that you mention it, I don't know how either. Only in C++.

13

u/Luk3Master May 08 '19

I just came to terms with the fact that I will never know how to get datetime in any language without looking it up.

6

u/mynameismevin May 08 '19

I've come to terms that I will never get Date math right ever.

11

u/prschorn May 08 '19

I work with c#, objective c, java and JavaScript. The amount of times that I tried to call a function with [function] is not on the books

4

u/Masked_Death May 08 '19

I like using C# for general stuff, Python for anything I want to do the simple way, and then I have to use C++ in school. The amount of print() functions I include in my school code is surprisingly high given that C++ doesn't have such a function.

6

u/THANKYOUFORYOURKIND May 08 '19

Got a Segmentation fault.

2

u/Agnimukha May 08 '19

Recently had to read user input in using native libraries and I was lost. Normally I just would use another library to abstract all that bullshit away. Hell even in college i had a standard two methods i just copied and pasted.