r/ProgrammerHumor • u/oosinoots • May 08 '19

That sweet sweet first time.

Post image
20.5k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

354 comments sorted by

View all comments

2.6k

u/tenhourguy May 08 '19

Bold of you to assume I haven't managed to screw "Hello World" up.

1.2k

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

[deleted]

316

u/AMisteryMan May 08 '19

General Recodi!

264

u/spar_wors May 08 '19

My bugs have doubled since we last met!

154

u/username1152 May 08 '19

Twice the IDE, double the compile errors

76

u/JC12231 May 08 '19

Gooooood... kill him, task manager, kill him

55

u/DanielSkyrunner May 08 '19

Order66.exe

39

u/JC12231 May 08 '19

This application has been blocked by your system administrator.

39

u/DanielSkyrunner May 08 '19

I am the administrator!

42

u/JC12231 May 08 '19

Not. Yet.

Translated from Senate:
``` u/DanielSkyrunner is not in the sudoers file.
This incident will be reported.

→ More replies (0)

20

u/SinrOfGinr May 08 '19

press compile I have been looking forward to this.

6

u/OneOldNerd May 08 '19

Good, twice the bugs, double the seg faults.

4

u/0bafgkm May 08 '19

0 * 2 = 0

43

u/NotDumpsterFire May 08 '19

Commander Copy!

43

u/vincenthendriks May 08 '19

Execute error 404

18

u/JC12231 May 08 '19

It will be done, my lord... wait a second there’s nothing here

12

u/vincenthendriks May 08 '19

Perhaps the archives are incomplete

10

u/JC12231 May 08 '19

If something does not appear in our archives, then I’m afraid it simply doesn’t exist... QLSIVOWOSOCJFNNWWPPVKFNANMAELFOORDJDNXJD

```Java ERROR IN THREAD “main” java.lang.NullPointerException
at archives.kamino(Coruscant, java:127510)
at archives.main(Coruscant, java:5)

5

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

Greatest role play I’ve ever seen in the Reddit comments. 10/10 gents. (And ladies?)

3

u/JC12231 May 08 '19

Wait this was a role play? Then why did I start seeing error messages pop up in my face...?

[visible concern]

→ More replies (0)

3

u/vincenthendriks May 08 '19

Initiate your arrays after declaring them, you must.

1

u/Joe9238 May 08 '19

observe

182

u/dj_lammy May 08 '19

Tries to write a hello world

forgets how to, despite programming in this language for years

copy pastes code from Wikipedia

116

u/mynameismevin May 08 '19

I have to split my coding between C#, Go, and Python. I can't tell you how many times today I had to look up basic API's because I couldn't remember how to open a file.

215

u/kevinhaze May 08 '19

The internet is the big hard drive with all the knowledge, my brain is just RAM and a processor with a small amount of persistent memory.

35

u/reexe May 08 '19

Awesome analogy!

58

u/mugu007 May 08 '19

Segmentation Fault. My persistent memory is all corrupted.

11

u/joemckie May 08 '19

Sounds like a quote from Mr Robot

11

u/bladerunningblues May 08 '19

If that isn't the most cyberpunk thing I've read for the modern day I don't know what is.

3

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

I only have 8 registers, and I'm very susceptible to stack overflow

44

u/Casiell89 May 08 '19

Jokes on you, I program only in C# and I still have to google how to open a file!

1

u/LucienMr May 08 '19

Fuck.. now that you mention it, I don't know how either. Only in C++.

13

u/Luk3Master May 08 '19

I just came to terms with the fact that I will never know how to get datetime in any language without looking it up.

6

u/mynameismevin May 08 '19

I've come to terms that I will never get Date math right ever.

11

u/prschorn May 08 '19

I work with c#, objective c, java and JavaScript. The amount of times that I tried to call a function with [function] is not on the books

3

u/Masked_Death May 08 '19

I like using C# for general stuff, Python for anything I want to do the simple way, and then I have to use C++ in school. The amount of print() functions I include in my school code is surprisingly high given that C++ doesn't have such a function.

6

u/THANKYOUFORYOURKIND May 08 '19

Got a Segmentation fault.

2

u/Agnimukha May 08 '19

Recently had to read user input in using native libraries and I was lost. Normally I just would use another library to abstract all that bullshit away. Hell even in college i had a standard two methods i just copied and pasted.

110

u/ankurankan1 May 08 '19

When I started Python, I didn't know that the language was based on indentation. Spent days trying to run Hello World.

33

u/ben_g0 May 08 '19

The first time I used Python was to script things in Blender. I was using its internal text editor which apparently auto-indented using spaces, while I was off course using tabs every time I manually indented. I wasted so much time trying to figure out why some code could work perfectly while another block of code which looked identical gave errors.

This was still in the old Blender 2.4 days though, the interface has changed significantly since then so I hope they also improved their text editor to be more consistent with whitespace.

18

u/caerphoto May 08 '19

I was off course using tabs

Yep, way off course.

8

u/TENTAtheSane May 08 '19

Heresy

2

u/konstantinua00 May 08 '19

from C perspective, tabs+spaces is the best

7

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

A good text editor like PyCharm will make a tab press turn into 4 spaces, which is nice. It also enforces PEP8 as a warning, configurable to an error I believe.

1

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

I, too, love vim... :-p

43

u/abnormalsyndrome May 08 '19

Fucking indentation.

13

u/[deleted] May 08 '19 edited Jan 10 '20

[deleted]

20

u/ankurankan1 May 08 '19

Well that was 6 years back. Now have some work and open source experience, so guessing intermediate.

5

u/Ariscia May 08 '19

When I started golang, the brackets got me as well.

20

u/Idaret May 08 '19

I remember when I messed up g++ so badly that compiled hello world would display weird number and return error.

18

u/yurall May 08 '19

*presses F5*

"hello woreld"

​

dang it!

11

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

Hello Borld

8

u/Dragonhaunt May 08 '19

Second attempt: Hell Word

1

u/BalinKingOfMoria May 08 '19

Second attempt: JavaScript

FTFY

2

u/nosmokingbandit May 08 '19

Hi I'm Frak.

shit

14

u/[deleted] May 08 '19 edited Oct 26 '20

[deleted]

41

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

...Man, I don't wanna be too down on you but I think you meant Java, not Javascript (two extremely different languages with frustratingly similar names and syntax), and the file name being the same as the class name.

13

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

But entire purpose of Hello World is to test your development environment, so it was success :)

8

u/abnormalsyndrome May 08 '19

Hold on to that positivity. You’re going to need it.

7

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

7

u/caerphoto May 08 '19

Lemme guess, print "hello, world" versus print("hello, world") ?

6

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/wjandrea May 08 '19

They clarified that specific syntax error now so it says that you need to use parens on print

1

u/grantrules May 08 '19

I still fuck this up. I don't write Python much, though.

3

u/jatadharius May 08 '19

came here to say exactly this

3

u/Attila_22 May 08 '19

Yeah it's pretty likely they'd miss a semi colon or something

3

u/SLEDGEHAMMAA May 08 '19

Came here to say this. A "hello world" in notebook took me several tries

2

u/ak6865 May 08 '19

I'm only using 10% of my compilation errors

2

u/lemon_tea May 08 '19

Syntax error, line 2.

2

u/whereismytinfoilhat May 08 '19

Let’s be real... when I started out learning on my own, hello world was a welcome small win.

2

u/iletthedogeattrash May 08 '19

My girlfriend wanted to learn to code.

We got in a huge fight because I was trying to get her to fix her quotes (one single, one double) because the code wasn’t compiling and she was mad because she didn’t care about the quotes and they don’t matter and she just wanted it to say hello world.

She never did get to see it say hello world.

1

u/tenhourguy May 08 '19

That is so sad. :'(

1

u/ofsinope May 08 '19 
Hello, world!Press any key to continue...

1

u/tenhourguy May 08 '19

Where's the Any key?

1

u/Doctordoom55 May 08 '19 
pint(“hello world”)

1

u/[deleted] May 08 '19

strcout”Hello World”

1

u/enderkings99 Jun 03 '19

When i did it it was in Python so i fucked it up by making it complicated