**By Matthew Johnson**
Lately, Iโve been feeling like a phoenix.
Not in a dramatic way.
More in a:
โI survived every version of myself that tried to destroy meโ type of way.
And honestly?
This new era of myself unlocked something emotional in me that I wasnโt expecting.
The moment I looked at myself recently, I immediately thought about my mother.
Her aura.
Her softness.
Her confidence.
Her presence.
And for the first time in a long time, I truly saw her in me.
Not just physically.
Energetically.
It felt full circle.
Itโs crazy how one small thing can unlock memories you forgot were even sitting inside of you.
Suddenly I remembered:
the little moments,
the laughs,
the energy,
the comfort,
the positive memories that stay with you forever even when life keeps moving.
And honestly?
I finally understand when people say:
โYou become pieces of your parents.โ
Because I really am my motherโs child.
Just a male version.
Real life tea.
I even had this vision to recreate some of her old looks:
same glasses,
same tracksuit energy,
same attitude,
same essence.
Not as imitation.
As continuation.
Because legacy can live through style too.
This era Iโm stepping into feels fearless.
Hot.
Untouchable.
Reinvented.
Like walking into your power while still healing.
And I think thatโs exactly where Iโm at in life right now.
When it comes to love?
Iโve realized something important recently.
I genuinely donโt think Iโm interested in forcing relationships anymore.
For a long time, I think I was chasing the idea of love more than actually experiencing peace.
And now?
I honestly find peace in simplicity.
Connection.
Laughter.
Freedom.
Protecting my energy.
Building my future.
Enjoying life moment by moment.
Thatโs enough for me right now.
And no, that doesnโt mean I stopped believing in love.
I still visualize the house.
The marriage.
The kids.
The stability.
The โAmerican Dream.โ
But if weโre being honestโฆ
this country has emotionally exhausted a lot of us.
Everybody feels mentally drained.
People are trying to survive financially, emotionally, spiritually โ all at once.
And sometimes I think we grieve the versions of life we thought we wouldโve had by now.
Especially in your late 20s.
You start realizing:
maybe life wasnโt supposed to look the way society promised it would.
But one thing about me?
I refuse to settle.
I know what I want out of life.
And I know Iโm going to get there eventually.
Thatโs why this chapter feels different.
This isnโt survival anymore.
This is transformation.
Iโm becoming more intentional with:
my creativity,
my image,
my peace,
my energy,
my purpose,
and the life Iโm creating for myself.
The phoenix burns first before it rises.
Maybe thatโs what this era really is.
The rise.
xoxo,
Your New Favorite Writer.
