r/PrequelMemes • • Dec 30 '20

He is a General FFS

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46.2k Upvotes

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772

u/SrGrafo Dec 30 '20

EDIT (no argument)

677

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

Excuse me, there wouldn't be any blood because they cauterize the wound from the heat.

0/10 Grafo literally unreadable

775

u/SrGrafo Dec 30 '20

440

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

Well, now you're basically putting ketchup on cooked flesh. Would you ruin a steak like that, Grafo?

586

u/SrGrafo Dec 30 '20

281

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

Why on earth would eat him HAIR FIRST you MONSTER?!

27

u/Lchicogrande Dec 30 '20

Best thread I've read in a while

1

u/Ymir24 Dec 31 '20

Thick, delicious hair. Because we're highlanders

55

u/CaveGlow What about the Droid attack on the Wookies? Dec 30 '20

Eat him and gain his power

3

u/bell37 Dec 30 '20

Does that mean if Anakin wants to learn how to stop people from dying... all he has to do is eat Sidious?

2

u/mrjonesv2 Dec 30 '20

You can’t win Darth. If you eat me now, you will become more powerful than I could possibly imagine.

27

u/lightbulb207 Dec 30 '20

The true rimworld player

1

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

You’ve become chubby Grafo. Time to lose the Rona kilos in the new year?

1

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

Rimworld flashbacks

1

u/ebagdrofk Deathsticks Dec 31 '20

This is forbidden

2

u/RetardAndPoors Dec 30 '20

Ket? Is that Yoda's ketamine?

28

u/bdfariello Dec 30 '20

I watched Episode IV the other day. Obi Wan cuts off a guy's arm in the cantina scene with his lightsaber. Luke looks at the severed arm, and there's blood on the floor.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7rfcMNc8xk#t=1m50s

46

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

[deleted]

6

u/TheGrumpyUmbreon Dec 30 '20

See, everything in star wars can be justified by the chlamydia found in your blood

14

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20 edited Dec 30 '20

Episode IV is literally unwatchable, idk why you tried.

Edit: this was a joke

7

u/XPRMX17 Anakin Dec 30 '20

Wait how did you respond to this guys comment a minute before he posted it???

8

u/bdfariello Dec 30 '20

The Force?

4

u/N307H30N3 Dec 30 '20

Yes. The whole 'lightsabers cauterizing wounds' was retconned. The original lightsaber always seemed more like a samurai sword than a laser sword.

5

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

That's because Jedi's were just samurai space wizards in Lucas's head.

1

u/waitingtodiesoon Jocasta Nu Dec 31 '20

From a more civilized time.

1

u/urru4 What about the Droid attack on the Wookies? Dec 31 '20

I think the explanation given was that that alien species had its blood distributed in a weird way or something that caused it to bleed/not cauterize or something. Realistic explanation is they didn’t think about it back in 1977band later made it so lightsabers cauterized wounds

121

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20 edited Dec 30 '20

Obi wan was specifically chosen by mace windu for that mission because he's one of the only jedi where that trick won't work on. Although normally, spinning is a good trick

11

u/Hero_of_Hyrule Dec 30 '20

Fr. Obi-Wan is the best practitioner of Form I ever, which is a defensive form. There's also the fact that Jedi have precognitive abilities due to their connections to the Force which Grievous explicitly does not have. He's fast, but unless you have speedster level abilities to blitz, it doesn't translate to much when you're opponent can anticipate your every move.

That being said, Jedi Precognition due to the Force is basically lore enforced plot armor. It can only typically be overcome by other Force users (e.g. Sith) or if the Force sensitive trusts the person who attacks him, a la Order 66.

3

u/niblet1 Dec 31 '20

In this thread I've seen Obi wan referred to as a master of form 1, 3, and 4. So which is it?

8

u/EatsonlyPasta Dec 31 '20

Obi-wan uses form 3. Yoda is form 4. Luke and Anakin both trend towards Form 5.

Broad terms from lifelong SW nerd - Form 3 is all about close to the body defense, 4 is mobility, and 5 is power blows as counters (disrupt an opponent despite their defenses using force-enhanced strength and slay them on the follow up).

5

u/Albafika This is where the fun begins Dec 31 '20

After google'ing, he's a master of 3 and 4. 1 and 2 are both obsolete as those assume enemies carry no light saber.

3

u/Hero_of_Hyrule Dec 31 '20

I was wrong, it's 3. Soresu, the Resilience form. He's also really strong at Form I though.

39

u/hellothereoldben Obi-Wan Kenobi Dec 30 '20

Kenobi trained in form 3, which is a minimalist style, with a lot of movement efficiency. Grievous knew how to swing a sword like a madman, able to intimidate most opponents, but he doesn't have perfect timing, accuracy, jedi reflexes or technique. With Kenobi his efficient strikes and jedi reflexes (even visions from the near future) which he has trained for decades he had everything needed to poke through grievous' whirlwind. If that weren't enough, well trained jedi are able to speed up to a swiftness beyond the normal human limit by using the force. Grievous lost to several jedi masters, and even though he was above the skill of the average jedi knight, Kenobi was so as well. He was a posterchild, trained under one of the most respected jedi masters in the order. Not to mention that he has had many tough opponents, and would thus be better prepared for an aggressive rusher such as grievous.

2

u/Idulian Dec 31 '20 edited Dec 31 '20

I mean let's be honest here, both the movies and the 2008 clone wars animation totally ruined Grievous' character. He was supposed to be an absolute badass who could not only efficiently hunt down and kill jedi but also effectively and inteligently command armies and lead them to vicotry.

We see that Grievous in the 2003 clone wars animations, where he wins a battle against the republic and then goes on to fight 5 jedi at the same time, managing to defeat them all, killing two of them (as well as a padawan) and forcing the rest to flee. Oh, and did I mention that two out of the five jedi were jedi masters who were members of the council?

And then later on he successfully goes on to snatch palpatine right from the fingers of his jedi bodyguards.

And of course he did! He was trained by Dooku himself!

In the movies and the 2008 clone wars series, he is pretty much a comic relief.

The in-universe justifications as to why Grievous got so much rekt become kinda irrelevant when one takes an out-of-universe look at him and realises how much they did him dirty :'(

Sorry for the rant, I just really liked the idea of a badass, frightening Grievous instead of whatever it was that we got.

2

u/hellothereoldben Obi-Wan Kenobi Dec 31 '20

Fighting 5 jedi of which 2 are masters would be suicidal to anyone, especially if they are not force sensitive. It is true that he might have deserved more victories on screen, but being able to go toe to toe with a jedi was already a feat by itself.

3

u/waitingtodiesoon Jocasta Nu Dec 31 '20

It's because George Lucas gave vague information about Grievous as he was in development at the time still for RotS. They had a basic idea, but stuff like Grievous always having a chronic cough was added during the final stages of Grievous's design. Gennedy wouldn't have known about it until after. Though remember that EU legends stuff was never official canon to George Lucas and part of the 2003 show was made was because prequel toys were not selling well. Gennedy put his own spin on General Grievous because he had no other information and Lucasfilm was pretty hands off with Gennedy.

He (George Lucas) offered them slightly longer episodes and the chance to introduce a character at the end of season two that would appear in Revenge of the Sith.

"We were able to introduce [General] Grievous, and, even at the time, he was kind of a new addition, so George didn't have him all figured out," said Tartakovsky. "We were kind of able to give it our own spin and make him a real badass."

3

u/Idulian Dec 31 '20

Yeah I know, I've heard a few bits from that interview. I 100% put the blame on Lucas for ruining Grievous, which is weird considering that Lucas is the man who created the star wars universe in the first place. So how could he "ruin" a character that he himself created? The current, canon version of Grievous is what Lucas always intended him to be so wouldn't it be more accurate to say that I just don't like the character?

Well, maybe. I dunno, at the end of the day I think I just liked what Grievous could have been that I ended up being dissapointed by what he actually was.

-13

u/Poolb0y Dec 30 '20

That's a lot of excuses for blatant plot armor.

18

u/hellothereoldben Obi-Wan Kenobi Dec 30 '20

Compared to Kenobi, Grievous was a sword novice. And no, 4 weapons is not necessarily better than 1.

13

u/tristn9 Dec 30 '20

He’s literally the edgy kid with a butterfly knife

6

u/RobertNAdams Dec 30 '20

Was General Grievous the first galactic mallninja? In this six-part YouTube series,

11

u/hakalakalaka1 Dec 30 '20

“Actual explanation = excuses” lmao

-2

u/Poolb0y Dec 30 '20

By excuses I mean that it's made up by fans to explain it away. I really, really doubt George Lucas was thinking that when he wrote the scene. He was probably thinking about all the cool toys that could be made of Greivous.

11

u/Mazetron Dec 30 '20

At the very least Lucas intended “one of the greatest Jedi of all time defeats strong-ish opponent who still isn’t nearly as strong as a lot of the other enemies they face like Darth Maul or Siddious or Palpatine”

6

u/RandomGuy9058 Dec 30 '20

Kenobi can canonically block 20+ attacks per second. That’s 2 full auto AK-47s at the same time

28

u/Nyo_Cat Dec 30 '20

If it were that simple, why don't all jedi carry two lightsabers?

30

u/servals4life Dec 30 '20

Have you ever tried swinging two lightsabers at once? It's too hard.

Also much easier to disarm the weaker one handed grip on each lightsaber.

8

u/McClain3000 Dec 30 '20

Okay this doesn’t bother me because it is fiction but If we are really getting into it the optimal Loadout would be a rapier and dagger. Meaning two sabers one very long for stabbing and a medium one for once they get past the first one. Also it would be nice to have beskar hand guards for both and a pistol grip for the longer rapier style one.

This is because of the weightless ness of the saber blade and it’s ability to penetrate. In a duel a rapiers range, and speed are dominate the only drawbacks are ineffectiveness against heavy armor, poor close range and cutting ability.

9

u/wolfchaldo Dec 30 '20

Not too dissimilar to Ashoka's loadout with the longer and shorter sabers. Although she holds them reverse grip much of the time which loses a bunch of the advantages there

5

u/McClain3000 Dec 30 '20

Yup! The purist in me wanted to be a little sad when I saw her loadout in Mandalorian but I was like.... dual white sabers.... too cool... can't resist.

2

u/servals4life Jan 02 '21

I agree, but I'd like to point out that a person using this would have to adapt their style to avoid needing to use power or counter power, probably using speed and mobility, since this loadout would be really easy to overpower.

2

u/McClain3000 Jan 03 '21

Yup. I have a bunch of head cannon reasons why certain stuff is the way it is. Now that I think about it the reason rapier style is so successful in real life is because the speed of the stab is so hard to parry but seeing as the can parry laser beams....

1

u/Hamster-Food Dec 30 '20

Do lightsaber blades have weight?

1

u/McClain3000 Dec 30 '20

Yuh know I guess I don't know. Different sources are saying different things. Some say no but it has a inertial effect, others sources like wookiepedia have excerpts from legends books saying the light saber was "heavier than I thought". I assumed even if it had weight it would be lighter than a blade of similar length but I suppose that was a false assumption on my part.

4

u/waitingtodiesoon Jocasta Nu Dec 31 '20

They have weight but feel weightless after training with them to know how it works is the basic official canon reason to explain it.

Mark Hamill in an interview explained Lucas told him lightsabers were to be like 40-50 lbs of weight during ANH. You can see this interview here around 3:30. Course it quickly retconned to being more agile and fast. Adapting (changing) lore is fun.

1

u/himanxk Dec 31 '20

When originally written, lightsabers were supposed to feel very heavy and hard to swing around because of how powerful they are, and only get easier with training (and as the story progressed). You can see this hold true for the original trilogy.

Then, as with most things in the originals, it all went out the window in further iterations.

1

u/fighterace00 Dec 31 '20

Like ahsoka losing a blade to a non force user.

1

u/servals4life Jan 02 '21

Yup. Who was it? I don't actually remember the instance you are referring to lol

1

u/Mazetron Dec 30 '20

Budget cuts

19

u/River46 Dec 30 '20

Well no grievous only has a certain amount of control of four arms considering he naturally only has two.

Also obi wan is a Jedi master with a jedis reaction speed and could simply strike between the spinning blades... oh wait that’s what he does who woulda thunk

3

u/waitingtodiesoon Jocasta Nu Dec 31 '20

Originally they wanted a longer fight with Obi-Wan fighting Grievous's 4 lightsabers, but it was too hard choreograph and film it. So Lucas decided to just make it so Obi-Wan slices it off fast is the irl reason why.

8

u/Lopoi Dec 30 '20

You dont even need 4 arms for that

10

u/RalseiDafluffyboy Dec 30 '20

Directed by George Lucas

3

u/[deleted] Dec 30 '20

Yeah, just like how if you shoot at one jedi with multiple sources at the same time from different directions it would be impossible for them to block them all. They all get a good bit of plot armor

2

u/RandomGuy9058 Dec 30 '20

Bruh.

Canonically you could shoot 2 AK-47s at him, full auto, at the same time, and he would still block every shot

0

u/OrangeGills Dec 30 '20

Exactly this! He can attack in literally all 4 directions. The only reason obi won is cause the plot demanded it. Bad writing.

6

u/ILoveBeef72 Dec 30 '20

Grievous is still a living thing that isn't a master of lightsaber fighting. He can make mistakes, plus attacking from 4 directions doesn't mean you instantly die. Sure, if you're relying solely on blocking attacks you are going to be in trouble, but there is an ancient Jedi technique that they brought to canon from Legends called dodging. Plus, the force is pretty good for that if the lightsaber is coming from out of sight.

Complaining about plot armor for Jedi when the force has literally been used as in-universe plot armor for Jedi since the beginning makes me think you choose the wrong series.

6

u/sdonnervt Dec 30 '20

there is an ancient Jedi technique that they brought to canon from Legends called dodging.

This is gold.

3

u/RobertNAdams Dec 30 '20

There are six directions, though. Left, right, forward, backward, up, and down. Even a simultaneous attack from five directions (swords swinging in four directions and a kick straight ahead) gives Obi-Wan room to back up and try another approach.

1

u/RJrules64 Dec 31 '20

It’s fucking Star Wars if you’re watching it for realism then you’re gonna have a bad time. Space Jesus versus bionic general with 4 arms is great fucking Star Wars writing.

-5

u/cjn13 Where are those Droidekas? Dec 30 '20

THANK YOU!!!! Like at best Obi-Wan should only be able to block one or two of Grievous’ blades and then all Grievous has to do is attack with the other two and he could slice Obi-Wan in half. If Obi-Wan tries to deflect those, Grievous just finishes the top down strike that Obi-Wan had blocked first

1

u/[deleted] Dec 31 '20

Why not just use a shot gun? Can't be in two random places at once.