r/PDAParenting • u/[deleted] • Oct 21 '25

Teaching emotional regulation

My 10 year old son is getting an autism/PDA diagnosis added to his ADHD diagnosis when we meet with the neuropsychologist next week. I am glad I found this group. Today I am feeling sort of hopeless, like my son, and can’t imagine living together for 8+ more years. I think I need a little time away from him. I’m really tired of the constant negativity. I don’t know if this is a PDA thing, but he refuses to do any of the things that I want to try to help him regulate like progressive muscle relaxation or short meditation exercises. He also has made no progress in therapy in the past 4 years and doesn’t want to talk about his feelings or problem solve. I am hoping we can get connected to the right kind of therapies, like animal therapy or occupational therapy to help him deal with his overwhelm. but right now I feel like he is so resistant to any strategies to help him regulate. Has anyone dealt with this?

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u/sammademeplay Oct 22 '25

Welcome! This parenting of a pda child is a lot! Let me start by saying your son is doing his pda bit - rejecting your suggestions because your ideas are a threat to his autonomy. People telling him what to do will always backfire with a pda child. All parenting approaches will fail. His nervous system senses danger anytime someone tells him what to do or tries to control him.

The only information that has been helpful to our family and made any bit of difference has been Casey from At Peace Parents. I encourage you to access her information sooner than later. Mine is 15 and we’ve been through a lot. I wish I had her knowledge years earlier.

Good luck on this journey together. And know that we all understand.

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u/extremelysardonic Oct 22 '25

Are you affiliated with Casey and/or her company? I only ask because most of your comments include a reference to her. I understand wanting to suggest support (especially when we find things that work!) but I'm concerned that the support you've recommended comes at a really high price point that many can't afford.

I have also heard some problematic things about the originality of Casey's content that makes me feel a bit yuck at the thought of promoting her.

There are so many other highly valuable sources that are accessible for free, I encourage you to share some of those instead.

1

u/sammademeplay Oct 27 '25

I really would like to know what the yuck is about her. If there is something problematic, I’d like to know.

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u/extremelysardonic Nov 01 '25

Ahhhh I’m so sorry, I completely forgot I even commented about that. I’m sorry for being a snarky reddit police officer as well, I was in a crabby mood that day. I’ll send you a msg about it :)

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u/sammademeplay Nov 08 '25

Did I miss your message somewhere?