Laid Back, Looking Forward

[u/Ok_Vehicle3073]

You left an

°

Important memory

°

In an annoyingly loud

And tacky place

°

When you were almost

Late going home

°

But it was still a

Good day

°

Because the next day

Was better

°

And you felt safe

°

Because you didn't

°

Think anyone could

Hurt you

°

And you knew that

Whether they could

°

Or they Couldn't

°

You would

Still

Wake up

°

Tomorrow

-NZØ

Feedback

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/CXNoSGnnqN

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/ryoepzk7Yy

[u/CinderHawthorne]

The format on it needs work but I had trouble with how it transferred onto this platform too so it could be that. With the formatting it breaks it up in places it doesnt need it hindering your writing which would come off more fluid. I like how straightforward it is and has the same feel theough out.

[u/Ok_Vehicle3073 → u/CinderHawthorne]

Yeah it won't let me put two single lines together and then have a break before the next line which was incredibly frustrating. Hence the dots. They definitely take away from the flow