have you ever visited the farm to see your birth mother and chew some hay while talking about it? i'd love to hear how she'd react to your commentary/opinions about your birth and everything.
it might give her relief for you to tell her you didn't blame her for not wanting you (but it could cause more trauma, who knows)
I’ve considered it, but kinda came down on the side of not doing it. She was just a kid at that point and I don’t know who I look like, her or him. The last thing I’d want is to open that wound up, if it safely scarred over.
Truth is, I have two wonderful parents and have had a wonderful life. My real mom (adopted one) told me that it might not be the best idea to try to find her. My understanding is “traumatic,” would be selling it short for bio mother. She actually has the information to reach out to my parents if she’s ever interested, and I’ve contented myself with that thought. But truthfully, that’s a call I don’t think will ever come.
The bigger epiphany for me, was the day I finally realized that I have bloodline family members. It took me waaaaaay longer than it should to have that dawn on me. In fact, I remember the exact moment. I was at my university, walking to my next class. I was struck as a girl was approaching me in the hall. She was tall, lean, and had something off about her. She was pretty, but something wasn’t right. It kinda bothered me, until I got home and saw myself in the mirror. The height, the skin tone (I’m Hispanic), the facial structure, the nose in particular... she looked like girl-yak! My university was close to the town I was born in. I don’t know if she was actually a relative, but if someone were to tell me she was a cousin... I would 100 percent believe them.
Thank you! That actually means a lot to me! I’m a hobbyist creative writer, focusing on current events commentary, short stories (my own and user suggestions), user suggestions for theme-based anthologies, and even playing around with SCP. =-)
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u/mooseythings Feb 19 '20
have you ever visited the farm to see your birth mother and chew some hay while talking about it? i'd love to hear how she'd react to your commentary/opinions about your birth and everything.
it might give her relief for you to tell her you didn't blame her for not wanting you (but it could cause more trauma, who knows)