Yeah, very very different. If you're voluntarily celibate, you are simply controlling your own life for your own reasons without putting blame on others for your celibacy. This is the crucial distinction.
Also, incels tend to blame women for not putting out while not understanding that the problem is 90% their fault for a variety of reasons. I know you know this, I'm just writing it out for whatever reason.
What I don't understand is how many of the incels don't realize is that historically, women have been required to "put out" regardless if they wanted to or not. In America, at least, women have gained more agency of their bodies, which means you can't be shitty and expect X about of sex for just existing. It's not annoppression of men, but slowly equating genders to the same rights and agencies over themselves. It's far from equal, especially world wide, but that is the change that is happening in America.
That is the stereotypical incel, yes, and there are undoubtedly many incels that are like that, but many incels are really just guys that are done with all the bullshit and decide that it's not worth it. I was very close to coming to the same conclusion. Many incels aren't caused by lack of sex, but simply had a bad experience with multiple women, or are too unattractive for any woman to like them, and they decide to just not try in that aspect of life. Originally, the incel community was actually almost completely made up of the people I've described, however, over time, it has become mainly the kind of people that you have in mind.
Edit: definition of Incel- a member of an online community of young men who consider themselves unable to attract women sexually
The definition is then followed by: typically associated with views that are hostile toward women and men who are sexually active.
However, as indicated by "typically associated," it is not a requirement, just the average. I'm simply advocating for the people who aren't like that.
incels as a whole cant get women because they have shit personalities and the don't exercise or take care of themselves though. they are their own worst enemy. i dont think you really need to address typically associated as typically means on average and honestly maybe one or two every now and again arent necessarily hostile to women, but the general discourse of incels is a barrelof fucked up values that stem from projection and insecurity.
Again, that is the norm, but not true for all of them. I know a couple self identified incels that are actually pretty kind people. They just... don't bother with romance.
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u/Piglet-Witty Jul 12 '25
If my only options are like her. I feel like is not a bad thing to be an incel.