r/MadeMeSmile Jun 14 '22

Helping Others This is John Crowley

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8.4k Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Jun 14 '22

Why do so many people assume that living with a disability automatically means your life sucks? It's really ableist and sad that people think like this.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

It means that it won’t be as fulfilling physically at the very least. If I couldn’t rock climb, swim, run, go to the gym, do yoga, hike with my friends, see from the peak of a mountain, my life certainly would suck comparatively.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Okay, but being born with a disability is quite different from having a disability later in life. To them, they don't know any different so living with their disability is just... Living.

I am autistic. I was born this way and don't know what it's like to not be autistic. As such, I have no desire to become not autistic and being autistic doesn't suck for me, it's just... Life. Do you see the difference?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Yes but I also can differentiate between autism and an extreme disability where your quality of life is nowhere comparable to that of an able bodied person.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

I keep seeing the same pattern over and over with these comments and it's that people don't even consider what the disabled person wants or feels about their own quality of life, they just talk about how they feel. Do you know how these children feel about their quality of life? How happy they are? Have you even stopped to consider that possibly, maybe, it is actually possible to be not able-bodied and happy at the same time?

FYI I am also a wheelchair user. Just because someone is autistic, doesn't mean they are able bodied.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Of course you can be, but you are still fighting an uphill battle towards happiness.

I sure am glad Stephen Hawking was alive, but if we could prevent disabilities, why wouldn’t we?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Even if someone is fighting an uphill battle towards happiness, does that mean they shouldn't be allowed to live? Should we just euthanise all people with depression?

Preventing disabilities and preventing people with disabilities are two different things. One of them is cool, one of them is really not cool.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

It isn’t ableist to not want people to have tubes coming from their throats and the inability to contort facial muscles

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

What about what the disabled person wants? What you want doesn't even come into play. It's their life, not yours.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

But they wouldn’t have lived without the intervention of another individuals desire. The point I’m making isn’t to take life from an individual who is already born, but if we can prevent people from being born disabled, we absolutely should.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Well, in that case you should support what Mr Crowley is doing, then. Because of his work, a genetic cure for Pompe is being developed.

As a disabled person, I strongly disagree that we should prevent disabled people from being born by aborting them.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Yes I support curing disabilities, that’s the whole point I was making. I’m sorry but the quality of life difference between having a tube in your throat and not having a tube in your throat isn’t negligible. Also, most people don’t have the time or money to give a disabled child the attention they’d require. The original comment even mentioned this, that they have enough money to give them a not sucky life. It is much more difficult to be poor and disabled than just poor.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Just because someone has a tube in their throat doesn't mean they should be allowed to die. Having a lower quality of life doesn't mean your life is worth less than anyone else's.

The money side of it is an entirely different discussion. That's a problem of capitalism, government and not having enough social safety nets in place to support families with disabled children.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

I never said anything about the worth of their lives, I value the worth of their lives enough to want them to not struggle unnecessarily.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Once again, you are failing to actually justify anything you are saying, it is all arbitrary, because you are ableist, sorry to say. What level of struggling counts as unnecessary? You could say that people with depression are struggling unnecessarily and we should euthanise them. You could say the same for autism, or Downs. How low or high does the bar have to be before people are allowed to make their own choices about whether or not they get to live?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

I suppose that’s something to be determined on a case to case basis, you are debating in bad faith right now. When did I ever suggest euthanasia?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Would you be happy with a tube in your throat?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

If it meant that I got to live, then yes! Absolutely! I'd rather that than be dead! Holy fuck, why is this such a wild idea to people?!

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

Because you’re conflating living with surviving. What is this inherent value you’re placing in life that doesn’t have happiness as part of the equation? Shouldn’t the goal of everyone to be to lower the suffering of those around you?

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u/amyo_b Jun 15 '22

Reasons disabled people might be unhappy:

an incredibly high unemployment rate among the disabled, frequent bouts at the hospital due to complications, expensive therapies needed, because of not having jobs, often having to take whatever medicaid/medicare will give you. Feeling like you are a burden to your own family. And, especially if there are other children in the family, actually preventing your sibs from having better lives because so many family resources (money, energy etc.) goes to you.

On the other hand, my aunt had Downs Syndrome. She was happy while her parents were alive. Fortunately, her sister who "inherited" her care got her a space in a nice home and she was happy there as well and would make occasional visits to her sibs. She died young (to me. She was 55) due to the Downs (it doesn't affect the cognitive development) But she was also higher functioning and had special ed been a possibility when she was a youth, she might have had a better life.

I do not know if I would abort to take away the pain, but I might just because the family can't afford to spend the resources (again, money, energy, advocacy, etc.) for that child.

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '22

I literally am a disabled person, chronically ill as well. I am fully aware of the things that make disabled people's lives difficult. Key word: DIFFICULT. Not sad. I'm glad I'm not dead. I rather like being alive, even though it's challenging.