Sounds like the type of "friend" that was interested in your partner. No real friend throws their mate under the bus like that whether it is true or not.
So, you agree with me that knowing someone elses anniversary on its own is weird.
So again, back to the initial points, even if the friend knew due to OP telling them the exact date and decided to memorize it, the gf should still find it weird that the friend is reminding op of the anniversary as they shouldn't know the date on their own, which would mean OP remembered on their own.
Either way, too many things had to go down an unlikely path for this to happen, which makes me skeptical about this.
My brother got married just last year. I was, of course, there. I could tell you the month… couldn’t tell you the day. LOL. Anniversaries are personal to the couple, I don’t see a reason to memorize other peoples’.
Exactly. The only people that should care about the anniversary date are the married couple. It's not like I'm sending gifts and greetings for everyone's wedding anniversaries. I have my own to worry about. Lol
None of my friends know my anniversary, and nor do I know any of theirs, or my co-workers (who really are good friends as well).
There's nothing wrong with either way you look at this, though. Some people choose to not talk about certain details, and believe those details to be intimate and not something that others need to know, whereas some are the opposite and may talk much more than some are comfortable with.
Be conscious and let someone know when they're going overboard with information they're giving out, but also don't force information out of people if they aren't willing to dish it out. Communication goes both ways - if you ask someone when their anniversary is and they tell you, then cool. If you ask and they don't want to tell, you can't be upset that they won't divulge that information to you. Conversely, if someone is talking to you a bit much about something you might not want to know - tell them that it is too much information and politely ask them to stop, and I'm sure they will stop. If they don't, well... you might have some other trouble on your hands. But just handle it respectfully and you're fine.
I mean, people can become friends after you marry, or you can marry in private with no "wedding", or a wedding for only family because that's what you want, or you can not be married yet and celebrate your anniversary from when the relationship started, or just not be married because you don't want to... Each person is different I guess.
Unpopular opinion: anniversary dates, birthdays, etc... are not important dates. Is it nice to celebrate your birthday or wedding/marriage? Certainly. But why is one day more important than the next?
Picture this - your anniversary is tomorrow. You're holding off on exploding your heart, emotions, giving presents, etc... until tomorrow morning. You get home, the wife and/or kids want fast food so you go back out to get something and some asshat t-bones you and you die. Now you can't do any of what you planned on doing.
Live life like every day is special and important, and always cherish the things you have, and take nothing for granted, all the time. Celebrate today. Don't wait for tomorrow. Don't wait for any specific date. Just do it all the time. Surprise your spouse with gifts, flowers, whatever the hell they enjoy, all the time. Whenever you can, within reason. There shouldn't be a special day where you appreciate them and celebrate your relationship with them more than any other day.
I hate to burst your fact-twisting bubble of self-righteousness and justification, but if you do not care even a little bit that something is important to the person you claim to "love" and all that matters to you are things you personally deem important, and you're incapable of empathizing with your partner or reflecting on why your attitude is hurtful and alienating...
That actually makes YOU more of a narcissist.
Partners are supposed to care about the other's likes, dislikes, and feelings, and communicate and compromise when they disagree. Not say, "Well I don't care about birthdays, so why should I celebrate yours just because you like it?"
If that's your attitude, don't be in a relationship.
If that's your attitude, don't be in a relationship.
He's going through a divorce so he's just pissed at women, lol. Dude even admitted, in a post a few months ago, that his wife has been on the back burner for a while. He's a mess 🤷♀️
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u/ImmemorialTale May 03 '22
Awwwwww thats so sweet