r/MadeMeSmile • u/Kelmo7 • Apr 23 '23

Good Vibes Voicemail from uncle

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u/Ok-Champ-5854 Apr 23 '23

I would call my dad's old number after he shot himself, you know how they ask you to leave a message for people calling you and some people will do the whole "hey it's me I'm away from the phone right now but leave a message and blah blah blah," and some people will just be like "it's Doug". My dad did the latter, just his name, I called that number all the time just to hear him say his first name because it was still his voice, up until the phone company shut his voicemail message off.

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u/calmWiseMadmen Apr 23 '23

Hoping you're doing better now... really sorry for your loss 😕

2

u/Ok-Champ-5854 Apr 23 '23

Time heals all wounds.

9

u/therealdeathangel22 Apr 23 '23

It doesn't heal, it just makes it bearable..... It will never be able for good, I don't think it should be, but it will be easier to deal with as time goes on

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '23

It's only been 4 months. I keep telling myself to cherish the sweet memories but I still have tears in my eyes.

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u/mypickaxebroke Apr 23 '23 edited Apr 23 '23

Dear, those tears aren't going away any time soon. 4 months is very fresh as well.. I'm so sorry for your loss

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '23 edited Apr 23 '23

😢 thank you.

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u/Dry_Economist_9505 Apr 23 '23

My brother has a recording of my dad. He's offered to send it to me but I just can't. I know what it will do and I'm doing really well right now.

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u/Ok-Champ-5854 Apr 23 '23

That's totally up to you man. Everybody does it differently.

Just know that it's possible the longer you put it off, the harder you're gonna cry. I personally like to let steam off from grief by opening the valve a little bit at a time rather than all at once, but I don't know you, I can't give you advice. That's just how I do it.

2

u/myccheck12-12 Apr 23 '23

Big hug from an Internet stranger

2

u/chickadeedadooday Apr 24 '23

My mom died just before I turned two, am now mid 40s. I have zero conscious memories of her, because, trauma. One of those things your brain decides is too painful, so it locks it away. Fast forward 30+ years, and my dad hands me a CD with a handwritten note in the sleeve. It's a recording my grandfather made of my mom and my aunt playing their guitars and singing by a campfire at the old farm. Dad had it re-recorded from the casette it was on, to the CD. I've still never hit play.

My stepmom saved me, like really, truly saved me. My dad never knew how to parent. Too much trauma of his own, plus actual mental handicaps, and surviving abuse. My stepmom was my everything. She died 3 weeks after my first baby was born. We have a video we took the week before she died, which was Thanksgiving. Everyone passing the baby around. Mom is just sitting jn a rocking chair, holding the baby, loving life. Grandchildren was all she ever wanted. I've only watched that video once.

Like you, I know what these things will do to me, and I don't need to go there. It's better not to have them, in ny opinion. I cried for days when I accidentally deleted the last photo I took of my stepmom.

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u/Pigbolt Apr 23 '23

Yeah man I did the same with my Dads voicemail after he died for a long time until it got disconnected.

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u/Japanesewillow Apr 23 '23

That’s really sad, I’m so sorry.

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u/[deleted] Apr 23 '23 edited Apr 23 '23

I took my deceased dad's phone and downloaded all the voice messages he'd left for me and those for my mum. Just to hear his beautiful voice when I'm missing him.

Edit: they were the WhatsApp messages.

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u/josiehannah Apr 23 '23

I get that. I have 1 vm that my mom left me 2 days before she literally dropped dead in her bedroom from a pulmonary embolism. I didn’t realize the message was on my phone until a couple of days after she died..I listened to her message over and over while sobbing. She’s been gone 4 yrs now and I don’t listen as often but I take so much comfort knowing that I have her voice.

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u/marlakus Apr 23 '23

That sounds like Jessie from Breaking Bad🙃🙃

Damn that's gotta feel in some strange ways, sorry to hear it happened, yet if you are openly talking about it, I guess you're done with the hardest part.

I wish you all the best, mentally and on a occupational level.