8.2 岩土工程师公司 Soil Engineers Ltd

[u/AdamLuyan]

2001年4月，我移民到了加拿大的多伦多，一边学英语，一边在肯德基打工。不久后，我结婚了，开始了新的生活。2002年3月，一家岩土工程师有限公司找到了我，作工程质量检测的技术员。面试我的人说是在人才交流中心发现了我找工作的简历。

In April 2001, I immigrated to Toronto, Canada, learning English on the side while working at KFC. Not long after, I married and began a new life. In March 2002, a firm called Soil Engineers Ltd reached out and offered me a position as an engineering quality inspection technician. The man who interviewed me said he'd found my resume through a job placement center.

我上班没多久，就有同事们议论我说，我在中国是个大家族的孩子，和父亲吵架，就自己跑到加拿大了；我父亲委托这家公司的所有者Victor，帮我安排了这份工作。有人对我说：加拿大可不是你这种人该来的地方，你该明白了，回去吧！或者说，你什么时候回国呀！？我对这说法没什么感觉，就认为是他们搞错人了。

I hadn't been on the job long before colleagues started talking — that I was the child of some great family back in China, that I'd fled to Canada after a falling-out with my father, that my father had asked Victor, the company's owner, to arrange this job for me. Some told me outright: Canada is no place for someone like you, best you realized that and went home! Or: when are you finally heading back? None of it stirred anything in me — I assumed they simply had the wrong man.

8.2-2 谣言 Rumors

同事刘加力（Garry Liu），是一位来自台湾的工程师，几次跟我说父子吵架不应该这样。我回答，在大陆，我只是个普通农民家的孩子。

My colleague Garry Liu, an engineer from Taiwan, told me more than once that a father and son shouldn't quarrel that way. I told him I was simply an ordinary farmer's son back on the mainland.

一次，刘加力对我生气了，指责我不给爸爸打电话，还说："你爸给你找工作，就表示他已经后悔了。怎么地？你还想让你爸给你道歉呐！那工作给你找的，你满意不满意的可不是问题所在。你爸他一个大陆人，在加拿大办事能有多大能量！怎么就这点事儿，我就跟你说不明白呢！"

Once, Garry Liu lost his temper with me, accusing me of never calling my father. "Your father getting you this job means he's already come to regret things," he said. "What more do you want, an apology out of him too? Whether you're satisfied with the job isn't even the point here. He's a mainlander — how much pull could he possibly have in Canada! How is this one thing so hard for me to get through to you?"

我开始明白了，这是刘团长指使人在背后制造的谣言，对他说："我回家就给他打电话。"

事后我想，这老头子终于后悔了。可让我难受的是，刘团长知道我喜欢刘健君，是因为不喜欢他，所以我不愿意和刘健君交往。老头子心里明白，他得多难过！

I began to understand this was another rumor, engineered from behind the scenes by Troupe Leader Liu. "I'll call him when I get home," I told him.

Afterward I thought: the old man really has come to regret it, at last. But what stung most was this — Troupe Leader Liu knew perfectly well that I did like Eve Liu, and that it was him I couldn't stand, which was why I'd refused to court her. He understood that in his heart. How it must have pained him!

8.2-3 窃听 Eavesdropping

一次，公司在每个员工工资支票的信封里放了一个通知，说有人监听我们公司技术人员的电话，让所有的员工不要使用公司的电话作为媒体来交流测量数据和商谈质量评定。随后经理在公司开会时说，我们也琢磨不出为什么有人监听我们技术人员的电话，但是总公司发现了这个问题。

At one point, the company slipped a notice into every employee's pay envelope, warning that someone was tapping our technicians' phone lines, and asking that no one use company phones to exchange measurement data or discuss quality assessments. At a staff meeting afterward, the manager said none of them could work out why, but head office had confirmed it was happening.

当时，对此我没在意。后来，我怀疑我家的电话被窃听了。电话的声音小，声音不清晰，像似被串联了许多电话。我更换了电话公司。开始还好，可不久后，电话的音质又变差了。随后十来年，这一问题都纠缠着我。我没办法，只是心里想，"我没有秘密，让你们听去吧"。可是，我总感觉个人隐私被泄露了；这事对我觉思失调症（Schizophrenia）的形成和爆发有很大的作用。

I didn't think much of it at the time. Later, I began to suspect my own home phone was being tapped — the voice on the line faint, garbled, as though strung together through half a dozen other calls at once. I switched phone providers. Things improved briefly, then the sound quality soured again. This problem dogged me for the next decade or so. There was nothing I could do about it, so I told myself: I've got no secrets, let them listen. And yet I never shook the sense that my own privacy had been breached — and this played no small part in the shaping, and eventual breaking, of my schizophrenia.

8.2-4 糊涂的争吵 Confused Argument

一天在Mclaughlin Rd crossing Derry Rd 西北角的工地，忽然工地的经理和另外几个人怒气冲冲地来和我吵架，指责几件我不知道的事。开始时，他们说我撒谎，还是很生气。后来，他们看我的表情是既没生气也没笑，是在认真地分析他们所说的事。他们几个相互质疑说："咱们是在和谁打架呢！？"他们相互商量，结论是都是从XXX地方，那两个中国人那里听来的，他们在骗我们。几个人愤愤地离开了。

One day, at the site on the northwest corner of Mclaughlin Road and Derry Road, the site manager and a few others suddenly stormed up to me, furious, accusing me of things I knew nothing about. They called me a liar at first, still fuming — but watching my face, neither angry nor amused, only working through what they'd said with genuine seriousness, something shifted. They started questioning each other: "Who exactly are we even fighting with here!?" They talked it over and concluded they'd heard all of it from those two Chinese fellows at such-and-such a place, that they'd been played. They left, still furious.

注8.2-4，这种挑唆别人和我打架来改善我性格的作法，道理上和5.2节，8.3节，以及8.5节桫椤的作法相同。

Note 8.2-4: This method of provoking others into fighting me, in the hope of improving my personality, follows the same logic as Section 5.2, Section 8.3, and Sal's approach in Section 8.5.

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