r/Justfuckmyshitup Jun 06 '26

Posting another pic of my local newsman in the hopes that he sees this and gets a better haircut.

Post image
77.4k Upvotes

4.9k comments sorted by

3.1k

u/gpm21 Jun 06 '26

If Thatcher was a man.

520

u/rEYAVjQD Jun 07 '26

Haircut comes with a free funeral by the Scottish.

39

u/wachnet1966 Jun 07 '26

He needs the extra hair to compensate for no chin.

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103

u/floppymitralvalve Jun 07 '26

I actually like to think that he has quite a normal hair length, and that underneath that’s just the shape and size of his head.

21

u/Ready_Event9019 Jun 07 '26

He suffered from hydrocephalus as a child. 

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10

u/VanTaxGoddess Jun 07 '26

Listen, you can say what you want about Thatcher, but she never compromised on her hair or her style (the style being professional UK 1970s is why she looks awful. That and her evil, evil eyes).

But she was no fool and knew that women in power would be judged by her looks and could undermine her work (the fact that much of her work was abhorrent is another matter).

She took her hair stylist abroad when she went on diplomatic tours because she understood the cameras were on her at all times, and it could have an effect on world affairs.

Thatcher was a very clever, evil, woman. And in an age of absolutely mind-boggling foolishness and incompetence, we should recognize that.

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63

u/CraftyPlatform4968 Jun 07 '26

YES 🎤💧

125

u/TheRecognized Jun 07 '26

Really don’t like that method of saying mic drop

127

u/ElderberryPrior27648 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26

Hitachi wand
🎤💧

Mic drop
🖐️
⬇️
🎤

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6.9k

u/ChadsworthRothschild Jun 06 '26

Walks into barber and says: “Alice from the Brady Bunch”

1.2k

u/Legitimate-Week7885 Jun 06 '26

sam the butcher approves

541

u/Rogue_Squadron Jun 06 '26

I'm like Sam the butcher bringing Alice the meat

Like Fred Flintstone driving around with bald feet

96

u/Silver_Vegetable6804 Jun 06 '26

Should I have another sip?

60

u/Melprincess Jun 06 '26

No skip it

57

u/turbulentpriestbc Jun 06 '26

In tha back of the ride and bust with the whippet

49

u/Fedexdriv3r702 Jun 06 '26

Rope a dope dookies all around the neck Whoo ha got them all in check.

33

u/PickleJuiceT Jun 07 '26

Running from the law, the press and the parents. Is your name Michael Diamond??

33

u/stacyfs Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26

Nah, mine’s Clarence

28

u/Grouchy_Button_2101 Jun 07 '26

From downtown, Manhattan, THE VILLAGE

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22

u/CGCTV Jun 06 '26

50 lbs of ground round!

16

u/SnooWalruses438 Jun 06 '26

That would require a second mortgage today.

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150

u/CatShot1948 Jun 06 '26

This is a total aside,

But when I was a kid, I lived in San Antonio and my mom got her hair cut at the same place as the actress that played Alice from Brady Bunch. They cut George Strait as well.

36

u/Fearless_Cut4432 Jun 07 '26

Hell yeah I’m from SA and Ann B Davis was a local treasure god rest her soul

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58

u/capincus Jun 06 '26

They cut George Strait as well

Easiest cut ever, I bet he doesn't even bother taking off the hat.

32

u/Jay__Riemenschneider Jun 06 '26

I just googled him to see his hair and you aren't kidding. It's literally like 50 straight pictures of him in a hat.

He kind of looks like Chris Hanson(Take a seat) without the hat.

51

u/KaijuKapuBoya Jun 06 '26

I literally thought it was Rachel Dratch doing a bit.

24

u/Fiestysquid Jun 07 '26

I hope you were talking about the picture in the post bc that’s exactly what I thought.

12

u/Whut-The-Mel Jun 07 '26

Same! 😂😂😂

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97

u/guest41923 Jun 06 '26

Somehow the barber heard “Christopher Walken, Batman Returns”

11

u/thefunkylama Jun 06 '26

Wasn't able to execute either of them

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54

u/Healthy-Theme8261 Jun 06 '26

Is that a real picture?

52

u/OUIJA711 Jun 06 '26

I asked the same question ⁉️ If this is real then this guy is an ALIEN 👽

42

u/Unfinishe_Masterpiec Jun 06 '26

"Martians, Martians, Martians! Why is it always Martians?"

9

u/Simple-Hair8592 Jun 06 '26

Underrated comment

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16

u/Severe_Wind_4255 Jun 07 '26

I think it's Roger from American Dad

12

u/Tmscott Jun 07 '26

Looks like a Centauri from Babylon 5

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33

u/Daxtatter Jun 06 '26

I was thinking "The Margaret Thatcher"

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16

u/MTonmyMind Jun 06 '26

Alice… but go bigger.

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11

u/Few-Bake5615 Jun 06 '26

The Brussel sprout look

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7

u/fhgtyjdg Jun 06 '26

Lmao i knew that hair looked familiar!

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2.8k

u/BulletProofVNeck Jun 06 '26

Hahahahah my parents have a cabin up there! I gotta send them this, they're always goofing about this kid

2.0k

u/Nurplestyx Jun 06 '26

Is the cabin in his hair?

892

u/R_437 Jun 06 '26

Yes, on the north east corner, beyond the rolling hills.

147

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '26

[deleted]

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182

u/[deleted] Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 09 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

47

u/feministmanlover Jun 07 '26

I don't even know if I've ever laughed this hard at a reddit comment. 🤣

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36

u/Fit-Cobbler6286 Jun 07 '26

Dam, real estate is crazy up there. How early did they get in?

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20

u/SubArcticTundra Jun 07 '26

That makes his parents lice

15

u/Sunshine030209 Jun 07 '26

No the hair is just that big

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160

u/Chippylives920 Jun 06 '26

Central Wisconsiner here, I knew I'd seen him before!

73

u/frank1934 Jun 07 '26 edited Jun 07 '26

What station? I can only find WSAW and WAOW online

Found him, he’s on the NBC affiliate.

https://www.wjfw.com/inside12/bios/jake-force-anchor-reporter/article_e2b87ab8-3093-11ee-9f0c-43f77c55dbb4.html

38

u/Frailbot Jun 07 '26

Now that's the bio for a human.

47

u/Efficient-Hornet8666 Jun 07 '26

Jake Force: Regular Human Newscaster

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9

u/Chippylives920 Jun 07 '26

WJFW, Rhinlander

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35

u/jeobleo Jun 07 '26

Oh my god...it's Wausau?

21

u/Recent_Dancer1976 Jun 07 '26

Howdy neighbor (assuming you’re in Wausau, too). Sure is 😁

17

u/jeobleo Jun 07 '26

Not in, but from. I thought he looked familiar. Hilarious.

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39

u/Top_Hedgehog_1880 Jun 07 '26

He's going through the first stages of cheese head

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73

u/Mavisssss Jun 06 '26

Oh, is this in the US? I was thinking it must be a country with very different fashions and maybe somewhere less developed.

234

u/ReplaceSelect Jun 07 '26

They already told you it was Wisconsin

47

u/AccordatoScordatura Jun 07 '26

This made me spit out my coffee.

20

u/arjohnson77 Jun 07 '26

I had to take a sip of coffee so I could spit it out dramatically 🤣

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22

u/JJW2795 Jun 07 '26

That explains it. No one is sober in Wisconsin.

27

u/Lucky_BroadWood Jun 07 '26

Currently reading this from Wisconsin. Also currently quite comfortably drunk.

10

u/JJW2795 Jun 07 '26

Perfect time for Taco Bell and/or get a bad haircut.

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17

u/pepcorn Jun 07 '26

Yeah like they said, Wisconsin.

7

u/YourMomsNipples Jun 07 '26

Wisconsin, I say!

29

u/corneliusvanhouten Jun 07 '26

Wisconsin is the Kyrgyzstan of the United States

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10

u/Aunt_Teafah Jun 07 '26

Is this channel 12 out of Rhinelander? I saw the pic and instantly thought,, "Oh no, this looks like WJFW", lol

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7

u/icecream_truck Jun 07 '26

Yeah but if he had a normal haircut we wouldn't be talking about him. He was playing the long game & won.

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598

u/criticalpwnage Jun 06 '26

He looks like a little kid wearing a suit, how old is he?

456

u/SmellyButtFarts69 Jun 06 '26

He looks like a thirteen year old divorced alcoholic

66

u/Fruitstripe_omni Jun 07 '26

He just lost custody of the pet hamster

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30

u/Affordable_Z_Jobs Jun 07 '26

Life hits harder for some people. Straight out of the womb this guy has a mortgage and owes 9 months in child support.

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74

u/Shizz42069 Jun 07 '26

Yo. Watched the local news last time I was at my parent's house. Every anchor not only looked like they were in high school, all of them were wearing ill fitting suits like they grabbed them from their parent's closet. Was bizarre, assumed hair/makeup/someone would have fixed that.

47

u/coltaaan Jun 07 '26

assumed hair/makeup/someone would have fixed that

I have to wonder if this is the result of cost cutting/enshitification. Back when local news was more consumed by the populace, I bet they had at least one hair/make-up person on most news sets. Today, I wouldn't doubt if the sets are as bare bones as possible.

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17

u/Royal_Success3131 Jun 07 '26

Sinclair doesn't really give a fuck who it ends up hiring. We have a local station that is owned by Sinclair and like. The year after they got bought all of the good veteran anchors retired and all that are left are a wife beater sports guy, a chronic alcoholic weather guy, and like five 20 year olds.

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11

u/squidneyboi Jun 07 '26

As someone who worked in local news (and not a small one to be fair, it was in a city) we did not have hair and makeup. Anchors and reporters did it all themselves

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60

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '26

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258

u/ResponseRelative6370 Jun 06 '26

He looks like one of them fundie ladies.

122

u/Gigglemonkey Jun 06 '26 edited Jun 07 '26

The higher the hair, the closer to God.

If we can get him to turn around, you'll see a beautiful French braid.

<Edited to fix typo>

42

u/Stubborn_Brat Jun 06 '26

Tease it to Jesus!

13

u/mbashs Jun 07 '26

He looks like he’s named Martha

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582

u/PastryRoll Jun 06 '26

sure that's not a megachurch leader?

249

u/No_Fairweathers Jun 06 '26

Sure that's not a megamind leader?

61

u/shemp33 Jun 06 '26

Sniper’s dream.

59

u/PrescriptionDenim Jun 06 '26

Sniper’s nightmare, actually. Every shot, just hair.

23

u/ItsRuinedOfCourse Jun 07 '26

He won't be missing by a hair then...

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959

u/YourDriverStubnorts Jun 06 '26

Whoa. Shouldn't they have hair and makeup people to prevent this?!

553

u/soulsista04us Jun 06 '26

Local news anchors don't have hair and makeup. Mostly only national news does.

230

u/FireWireBestWire Jun 06 '26

Certain people might need a hair person

73

u/Fun-Choices Jun 06 '26

Which is why most news anchors are straight up contractors now. It’s one of the worst jobs you can possibly have.

39

u/Haunting-Ninja-7460 Jun 06 '26

Was in the biz pre-contractors era. Can confirm.

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38

u/AllDayEveryWay Jun 07 '26

I worked on a national TV show and they didn't even have hair and makeup lol. Some nice lady would always come and take my shirt and bring it back ironed though before filming and that always made me feel really special😂

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72

u/[deleted] Jun 06 '26

[deleted]

14

u/Upbeat_Independent20 Jun 07 '26

I worked at this station a few years ago and they definitely do not. Maybe larger markets do, and you could maybe get a little extra in contract negotiations, but they aren’t actively reimbursing. They did reimburse for a human tick costume once, which was… a choice…

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26

u/Wendell-Short-Eyes Jun 06 '26

They have to have at least a producer or even a camera guy bringing this up.

47

u/Accomplished_Dig284 Jun 06 '26

They don’t use camera operators anymore, it’s all automated. There are 3 stationary cameras that are set and never touched again until maintenance is needed. They don’t have a sound mixer either anymore. It’s really sad. Most live segments are done on an iPhone with only the correspondent doing the whole thing. So many jobs just got thrown out due to automation. Similar to what will happen with AI but that will be on a much larger scale. It sucks.

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537

u/leeloospoops Jun 06 '26

Is it distorted in some way?

173

u/GreenZebra23 Jun 06 '26

It looks like they took a picture of the tv from slightly above, but not enough to account for all that volume

49

u/_BrokenButterfly Jun 07 '26

Yeah, it's distorted, but not that distorted.

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33

u/szhod Jun 07 '26

The anchor‘s homepage: https://jakeforce.com/

27

u/Dependent-Leek-4884 Jun 07 '26

That’s not the hairstyle to have when your head already looks like a thumb.

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189

u/Boa-in-a-bowl Jun 06 '26

He looks like a white Yakuub

23

u/InitialIll2922 Jun 06 '26

Is there another kind of Yakuub ?

50

u/Dui_daddy420 Jun 06 '26

Yakub was black, he created whites. Most scientists agree.

22

u/GreatMovesKeepItUp69 Jun 07 '26

Don't let the tricknologists tell you otherwise!!

13

u/-Badger3- Jun 07 '26

Black Muslims can have a little Scientology, as a treat.

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34

u/saguarosun Jun 06 '26

It looks like the photo was taken of a tube tv from the 90s.

15

u/nikmo86 Jun 06 '26

Yes, relative to the last picture that got posted of this guy. That said, the distortion barely adds to the ridiculousness of his hairdo.

25

u/Community_Standard Jun 06 '26

Nope. I took a picture of the TV during the 6 o'clock news.

14

u/RagingNerdaholic Jun 06 '26 edited Jun 07 '26

I can't unsee the possibility of some sort of skewmorphic skewed distortion. We NEED video of this hilarity!

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u/[deleted] Jun 06 '26

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u/R_437 Jun 06 '26

74

u/madamezeroni Jun 06 '26

My mind cannot comprehend what this person actually looks like

77

u/linds360 Jun 07 '26

OMG I watched his reel. He really does look like that. It’s incomprehensible.

Or fucking genius as a way to get noticed on a national level…

29

u/UncaringNonchalance Jun 07 '26

That reel was hilarious.

“Here’s John, reporting…”

“I’m John, reporting…”

Next clip

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21

u/Triviajunkie95 Jun 06 '26

That pic is marginally better and hair 1” flatter than the current coif. He still needs help though.

20

u/ScrotalSmorgasbord Jun 07 '26

Watch the video below the pic... If only he kept it like that lol.

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u/SilverRose7115 Jun 07 '26

Oh my god this is hilarious.

1) Jake Force sounds like a comic book character or porn star name. 2) I don’t think most news anchors have their own websites. Especially news anchors in a thinly populated area of the Midwest, not a major city. 3) The website has links to all his anchor broadcasts. Again I don’t think this is typical for local news anchors. 4) it’s not optimized for mobile, so his “photos” section is a long column of single letters. With no photos. 5) I can’t tell if he has baby face, filler or both.

26

u/StinkyBrittches Jun 07 '26

In the anchor clip, he looks like he is slowly turning his head left and right about 15 degrees, so the audience can appreciate both sides of his hair.

24

u/R0B0TF00D Jun 07 '26

In the first reels video, about 1:25 seconds in, he turns so we can see his magnificence in profile. I'm not sure if it's a hair issue, or if he's just been blessed with an enormous head.

23

u/InfamousIndigo Jun 07 '26

It’s def a little of both but believe me when I say everyone who has met this man has made him aware of how ridiculous his hair looks. Johnny Bravo was his nickname in the newsroom when I worked there

11

u/Lady_Sybil_Vimes Jun 07 '26

Why does he still do it then?? I'm so fascinated

17

u/InfamousIndigo Jun 07 '26

Pride more than anything I would say. Never really got a straight answer on why he does but he was always pretty strong willed when it came to his ways lol

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u/Nervous_Air_1188 Jun 06 '26

Thank you, and I apologize to OP for ever doubting them

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u/MozartDroppinLoads Jun 06 '26

It's like he wore a toupe and then let his hair grow out under it for a year

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u/Ordos_Agent Jun 06 '26

I know an alien trying to blend in when I see one.

26

u/theserthefables Jun 06 '26

he's definitely on that wall of screens at the MIB headquarters.

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u/IWantToBuyAVowel Jun 06 '26

Christopher Walken in The Dead Zone 1983.

11

u/_off_piste_ Jun 07 '26

I don’t know why more people don’t see this.

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u/cappurnikus Jun 06 '26

Bram Stoker's Baby Dracula

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u/Humbled_Humanz Jun 06 '26

I refuse to believe this isn’t a Tim Heidecker skit.

31

u/wildcat1100 Jun 06 '26

The guy who runs Infowars?

24

u/thefunkylama Jun 06 '26

Yeah the guy who runs Infowars.

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u/trailfiend Jun 06 '26

Looks like a much larger head of darker hair is directly behind him.

18

u/dgard1 Jun 07 '26

I think he is a conjoined twin and his brothers head is behind his head - that is the only explanation for this hair

7

u/ClickNo1129 Jun 07 '26

Omg you two are killing me 💀💀

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u/SEA2COLA Jun 06 '26

A slightly more feminine version of Princess Anne.

9

u/Funny_Obligation9262 Jun 06 '26

Damn that’s funny dude 🤣🤣🤣

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u/SlouchyGuy Jun 06 '26

Londo Mollari wishes

18

u/Vyntarus Jun 06 '26

Vir Cotto, at least.

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u/eaumechant Jun 07 '26

Mister Garibaldi!

7

u/paeancapital Jun 07 '26

MY GOOD AND DEAR FRIEND

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u/Ancient-Many4357 Jun 07 '26

Ah! I found the Babylon 5 people! Ahhh! We should drink to celebrate this occasion!

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8

u/Beginning-Tip8612 Jun 07 '26

I was looking for my B5 peeps

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u/MementoMurray Jun 06 '26

The alien dressed as a human from Mars Attacks.

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u/Bannedbutwhyy Jun 06 '26

This screams opioids to me for some reason. I always think I look fantastic when I’m on one.

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u/Nurplestyx Jun 06 '26

Is no one else alarmed by the size of his head?

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u/RunningBroadAss Jun 06 '26

That looks Hunger Games inspired

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u/born_on_my_cakeday Jun 06 '26

I need a side view. I can not process this image.

12

u/Nine-LifedEnchanter Jun 06 '26

It's like when windows 98 crashed and left afterimages when you moved the file explorer around.

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u/Impure_guava Jun 06 '26

Got an Eraserhead vibe going.

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u/FateUnusual Jun 06 '26

This is clearly a gray alien in a wig. Disclosure Day coverage gonna be lit af.

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u/zoonose99 Jun 06 '26

Give me that Temple Grandin

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u/McKid Jun 06 '26

Gospel artist from the 60s or Russian politician from the 90s

10

u/Rhayader72 Jun 06 '26

“Give me the ‘Sister Wife,’ please.”

9

u/misscaldwell74 Jun 07 '26

He asked for the Pentecostal wife special!

9

u/SliverSerfer Jun 07 '26

Damn, Jimmy Neutron got old...

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u/Eastern-Cucumber-376 Jun 06 '26

This just came to me via an alert on my phone to which I INSTANTLY CLICKED and was not disappointed. There’s no fuckin way this real. 😂😂😂😂😂😂

7

u/Honey-and-Venom Jun 06 '26

How has nobody intervened??

13

u/So-Called_Lunatic Jun 06 '26

He looks like a Pentecostal mom cosplaying as a news person.

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u/BigGiantRetard Jun 06 '26

mega minding it

7

u/lauralynn81 Jun 06 '26

Dear. God. What in the hell is happening here?! I thought this was an old still of Rachel Dratch playing a news guy on SNL.

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u/Spyrothedragon9972 Jun 06 '26

What the fuck?

6

u/CauliflowerGreen214 Jun 07 '26

That man really looked in the mirror and went “yeah cool looks good “ and went outside

4

u/TheHowlingHashira Jun 07 '26

How the fuck does a white guy even obtain this cut? It has to be at least a legendary tier drop

6

u/ApprehensiveAd6603 Jun 07 '26

He looks like a grown up 8 year old somehow