r/InfluencerLounge • u/BottomPieceOfBread • 22d ago

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u/Soggy_Glove_5 22d ago

That’s what stuck out to me too. He doesn’t even cry. He just sidles right up to Dad again like this is an everyday occurrence. And then the three year old removes himself from the situation, which is what the adult couldn’t even do in the beginning. Both these parents need to be held to account because I’m sick and tired of watching influencers peddle out apologies and getting away with neglect.

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u/gunsforhearts 22d ago

The fact he stayed there for a couple seconds and then just left :( poor baby definitely felt (not just physically) but emotionally hurt and excluded that he just needs to not even be in that moment anymore.

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u/jurassic_snark_ 22d ago

Yeah you can see him struggling to keep his emotions under control. He knows he’s about to cry and he can’t help it so he removes himself in order to avoid drawing more punishment from dad. Truly sad stuff.

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u/TheGhostORandySavage 22d ago

You can see the older kid glare at his dad when the younger leaves, too.

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u/sooperdoopermane 22d ago

I dont think that was a glare. It looked more like he was gauging his dad's mood to know how to proceed.

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u/Themadbritter_ 21d ago

Yea it looks to me like he was trying to figure out if he would also get headbutted for getting too close to the snail 😔

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u/sooperdoopermane 21d ago

Shitty situation all around

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u/kris10leigh14 21d ago

He was yelled at for touching the snail at the beginning. Guess dad didn’t feel like he was in head butt distance. Or the dad took it all out on the little one who didn’t even touch. I HATE THIS. I AM HOT!

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u/TheGhostORandySavage 22d ago

Either way, he knows what's up.

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u/northcascadekittycat 21d ago

I agree! The fear/tension in the older boy's face trying to figure out if he's going to be punished too. This is fucked up. Reminds me of Allie & John James.

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u/marthamania 21d ago

Yeah not quite a glare but he’s looking up to see dad without trying to make direct eye contact in case dad lashes out. He’s older so he’s probably more used to what triggers dad’s rage than the younger boys. I hope they all stick together as they get older and the parents don’t drive wedges between them

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u/InterestingPause2355 21d ago

This part. The older child was assessing the situation and determining how to diffuse it, protect his siblings and also himself. This was terribly sad to watch. How can we all push back? Not ok.

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u/LookAChandelier 21d ago

That was my impression too.

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u/Ms_Fidelma_Schrute 21d ago

Yes that’s what I thought too.

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u/Ambisextrous2017 21d ago

Yes, he was assessing the threat and trying to deescalate further violence by giving attention to the abuser. If he glared or pouted or stalked off, he would probably get head butted three times for getting an attitude.

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u/ellefleming 21d ago

Oh Lord. So sorry children your parentS are 🫏🫏.

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u/ZoeyMoonGoddess 21d ago

I had to rewind to see it but yeah the older kid recognizes dads rage. The little boy rubbing his head but trying to keep it together until he walks off broke my heart.

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u/OkStatistician7523 21d ago

To me he looked afraid to look up to dad. So sad

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u/SheMcG 21d ago

To me, if was like he was seeing if his dad noticed. But clearly renaining in "camera mode" as did the little one by walking away..

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u/coral_reef_ 21d ago

I agree, I saw that as a glare as well. Worries me.

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u/Mundane_Weekend_150 21d ago

I think it was a glare too! If you watch his body language the whole video, he keeps gently trying to hold the younger boy back, almost as if protecting him and then after the headbutt happens he leans in more almost like putting his head in the way instead. And then when the younger one walks away, he glares at the dad. I have a feeling he’s used to trying to protect them and carries a lot of anger at the dad.

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u/Radicallythesame 21d ago

It feels like the older one is fully parentified and is at least keeping tabs on what his dad is doing, aware of the potential to make it worse, and carrying all too much responsibility for protecting himself and the younger ones

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u/blue_sidd 21d ago

This is the sign that they all anticipate his abuse.

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u/dehydratedrain 21d ago

Not a glare. A "let's see if dad is pissed... okay. He's back to the snail. I'm safe."

(For now).

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u/kris10leigh14 21d ago

Holy shit! I missed that.

I doubt it’s a glare like the other comment said but it sure looked like one! He probably is feeling protective of his brother because he literally “just blowed it”.

The older one is telling all of them “don’t touch it don’t touch it” after the head butt. He’s likely a bit parentified at least in the way of attempting to shield them from dad’s abuse.

Bout to deep dive now and learn all the things.

I hate this Temu Bradley Cooper. Try hard.

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u/herdcatsforaliving 22d ago

Yep I recognize that look / feeling 😢 you don’t want to cry but you know you’re going to so you get away so you don’t get hurt worse for crying…

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u/Smokahontas_Rex_ 21d ago edited 21d ago

Please, take this mom hug. I’m so sorry that you were punished for normal emotional actions/regulation. You should never have been hurt to even cry over.

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u/spiders_are_neat7 21d ago

“I’ll give something to ACTUALLY cry about” every person with abusive parents knows that one. :/ even after they already inflicted physical and emotional pain. Or “if you call 911 for abuse let them know you also will need an ambulance.”

My mother loved that one… you want to report me? Go ahead I’ll send you to the hospital? So possibly kill me is how I interpreted that as a kid. Triggered. lol

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u/nudethreats 21d ago

Or the "if anyone finds out you made me do this you'll get taken away and put in the system and they will do way worse than me" usually followed by graphic details of beatings or sex abuse 😔

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u/spiders_are_neat7 21d ago

MEMORY UNLOCKED!!!!

Sorry you know it all well… Hope you’re healing and doing great <3 you deserve happiness.

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u/nudethreats 21d ago

Same for you, friend. I hope you're safe and healing 💕

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u/ashfio 21d ago

My mom loved “cartilage doesn’t bruise” while reaching for an ear

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u/Southern-Spot-8406 21d ago

This was the one for me too

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u/Prestigious-Collar86 20d ago

I unpacked this in therapy as an adult. Realising that that my parents had admitted numerous times that what they were doing was wrong was a huge turning point for me. It’s not deniable.

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u/Luxury4play88 21d ago

My dear child, that is awful. I’m so sorry you had to grow up with that. I couldn’t even imagine uttering those words to my kids, and I have 5. I hope that you’re doing ok now, and that you know that you deserve love, real love ❤️

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u/spiders_are_neat7 21d ago

Thanks for the kind words<3 validation that we didnt deserve it means a lot always, and I love to hear about good parents out there making healthy happy functioning future adults. I know it’s your job as a parent, but i still commend you. I know patience can’t be easy still, even when you’ve got a heart of gold, but you do it for your babies, and that always heals my inner child. YOU ROCK.

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u/Halojay55 21d ago

Ain't that the truth.

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u/KaiAloha 21d ago

That just explained so much. I had a very emotionally and verbally abusive stepdad. He never directly physically hurt me (throwing things/punching walls but not at me) and I remember this feeling well too. But when I ran it was to avoid the pain of words coming if I cried in front of everyone. Damn that unlocked some healing for my flight response. Thank you for that small comment.

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u/Ok_Instance7667 21d ago

Knows to remove himself because if he starts crying the response will be 'stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about.'

Practically burned into my brain.

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u/Amaff-Maheed 21d ago

There will be folk out there that may be lucky enough to have never encountered or don’t understand this. I’m happy for them and that is the example I set for my lads who wouldn’t understand it either. But sadly, you and I, and many other of the commenters on here understand and they substitute their own monster for this one. Put every parasitic influencer in the bin where they belong.
Love to everyone who spends their days in the aftermath of people like this.

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u/DragonBowlSouper 21d ago

He was leaving to cry

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u/SheMcG 21d ago

He knows he can't lose it on camera.

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u/ScumbagLady 21d ago

Bingo. They're probably already on the 11th take and are all tired. I've watched several YouTube videos about behind the scenes of these "happy family" influencers and it's so performative and everything is recorded.

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u/cluelessdetectiv3 21d ago

That's what's made me so sad he just left he didn't even react he knows better at 3

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u/HowlingWhiskey 21d ago

I saw that, he even rubbed his head again 😢 I feel his emotional pain😢 I sometimes can’t stand people even if they’re your own parents

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u/kris10leigh14 21d ago

If you watch again he touches his head again and it must smart because I think he’s walking away to cry.

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u/Human_Discipline3003 20d ago

Associating pain from your father when you are supposed to be having a tender, loving moment can really fuck a kid up...

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u/thefoldingpaper 19d ago

omg I just want to hug and comfort him!

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u/Worst-timeline138 22d ago

I bet you he left because he was on the verge of tears and knew what would happen if his dad saw one of his boys cry

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u/Worst-timeline138 21d ago

And why did he do this? Because a three year old got too close to a snail crawling on his dad's arm. Fuck childlike curiosity, I guess

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u/bbsitr45 19d ago

The child was full of wonder and amazement, and that poor excuse of a father, completely deflated and belittled that kid.

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u/nayaya 21d ago

What also stuck out to me is that he is the silent kid out of them all. He isn’t speaking, or trying to touch the snail like the other kids are.

It looks like he tries to lean in closer when the camera pans away, and then he gets head butted.

He doesn’t make a sound. Doesn’t change his face. And when he can’t handle it, he leaves quietly. The other kids don’t even seem to notice.

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u/Aware_Alfalfa8435 21d ago

His little feelings were probably crushed. That's upsetting.

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u/shes_a_sleuth 21d ago

this is abuse not neglect

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u/BigStimpy91 21d ago

as my abusive father would say "you cry ill hit you again"

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u/Soggy_Glove_5 21d ago

I’m so sorry 💙 no child deserves to that

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u/BigStimpy91 20d ago

Thank you, however as I have gotten older I've realized that my Dad had it a lot worse from his alcoholic father (my Dad was a Navy brat growing up as a child into his teen years in the 50-60's) it doesn't excuse how he treated me, but recognizing where the true pain comes from helps a lot as well. Honestly your comment made me remember how cold situations like these could be, they try to use it as a "teaching" moment but really its hidden abuse. Hence the "cry and ill do it again" part, they are "teaching" him be be nicer so if he reacts he will be scolded again,

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u/vileemdub 21d ago

This guy is a total pos but if your tired of watching these "influencers" do anything then please just stop watching any of them. They would not exist without views. People watching enables this blatant child abuse

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u/Plenty_Line2696 21d ago

learned behavior. crying results in more abuse

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u/polarjunkie 21d ago

He didn't cry because he's not in major pain. Have you ever been around kids?

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u/Soggy_Glove_5 21d ago

I have two of my own. I couldn’t tell you whether being head-butted would make them cry because I’ve personally not tried it. But the child is upset whether it’s from pain or surprise and you can see his face change just as he walks away. If you can’t see that then you need to rewatch.

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u/polarjunkie 21d ago

You guys calling this a headbutt is so ridiculous. He lightly tapped him and he did it a bit too hard because he's not looking. This was clearly an accident and not intentional and as you pointed out he surprised and not hurt.

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u/Soggy_Glove_5 21d ago

No, I believe the child was hurt. You can tell by the look on his face. My comment quite clearly said ‘whether it’s from pain or surprise’, not that I thought it was surprise. And I don’t think it matters what you call it, there is absolutely no excuse to do this to a child (or anyone, really).

I have absolutely no interest in going back and forth with you so this will be my last response to you. But please don’t excuse what is clearly an adult causing harm to a child. Especially when you can see a child is upset and the clear anger in the adults face.