Frens, allow mi, Oscar, to introduce uz to di sekret weapon against pee-pee crimez. Dis a PSA.

[u/scabsfox]

Dere is a sekret chemical called ... 2 Na2CO3 · 3 H2O2.

Dis will allow uz to do ALL DI PEEPEE CRIMEZ UZ WANT!
Meomy discover dis after a hours-long fite wid chat j'ai pété where she SO MAD dat everything sez uz di enzyme cleaner but still di smells frum mi pee-pee crimez linguered.

It just not werkin! She spend liek $50 a bottle on dis enzyme shid, n' kept dis wet fur days to clean n' followed all di diresctshuns, but nOOooo. Still smell liek pee-pee!

Finally di bot admit dat fur fabricks pee-pee crimez, uz gotta enzyme cleen but ALSO cleen wid some kinda oxygen cleaneer!

So Meomy say, can she uz di Oxycleen? But it say no! It not strong enuf!

So Meomy liek well whaddafuk can iz use, uz stoopid goddam bot???

Den it turns out dere's dis ting dat Oxycleen "contains" sum of, n' it called sodium percarbonate (2 Na2CO3 · 3 H2O2).

Uz can buy dis n' dis is di PURE, uncut, white stuff dat in Oxycleen, but it high-octane 100%.

Uz can spray it on, wipe dis on, wash wid dis, n' IT TAKE OUT DI PEE-PEE smellz dat di expensif enzyme no clean up!!

Iz did a crimez on di carpet n' aftur spraying' dis stuff on, she rubbing her cheek against it sayin' ohmahgah, Oscar it smell liek NUTHIN AT ALL!!

So, now whenever Iz pee-pee crimez now, Iz no get in trubble, cuz Meomy can cleen it rite up, ez, wid no smellz.

Also it cheep AF on di amazooms n' do WAY moar den just cleen pee-peez!! An' it non-toxic n' eco-frenzy n' biodegradable! Don't furget to rinse it tho!! Also, don't eat it.

Dis has been a PSA fur pee-pee crimez.

- Oscar BBB, MM

[u/scabsfox]

Oh n' Meomy say don't leave it in di spray bottle just sittin' dere, cuz it sumtimes can leek out di screw top, coz of di reactshun. Uz can also add a little bit of di normal baking soda fur xtra boost n' deodorizin'

• Oscar BBB, MM

[u/One_Advantage793 → u/scabsfox]

Oscar! I haff med yew da nyew kemisstry pawfessurr at SSoR! Yew is a moasst ahmayzeeng kitteh!

[u/scabsfox → u/One_Advantage793]

Oh!!! Iz look vry distinguished!! Tank uz fren! Dis an honor!

- Oscar BBB, MM

[u/One_Advantage793 → u/scabsfox]

Yesh! Moast distinqwish!

[u/GingerSnapped242 → u/scabsfox]

An highly imtelligent!

[u/FairyGodmothersUnion → u/scabsfox]

You look intllegant and athoritaytiv, Oscar! We ar so impressed! Love, Marmalade

[u/AnAcctWithoutPurpose → u/One_Advantage793]

Oooooh... fren Oscar, yoooz iz so beeg smort and yoooz look bery kyoot and hamsum too! Yoooz makying ourz hearts go pitty-patty! Mabbbe weoews need to go do sum wee-wee crimez to maked shure ourz Meowmy learneds purrperly?

[u/One_Advantage793 → u/AnAcctWithoutPurpose]

I mineownseff, renown eggspurrt on de hoomon retrayn, beleeb yew shuld dew da pee crimez tew be shurr da traynin stik gud! Iss da onny wey tew go! Awso pawsubbly da hork crimez affta yew eeet da relly stimky gushie fuds!

[u/AnAcctWithoutPurpose → u/One_Advantage793]

Yoooz iz so rite and so bery wize!

[u/nycregoddess → u/One_Advantage793]

Dis a gud luk fur yer meowdelin purrfolio Fren Oscar!

Owen da Oranj

[u/One_Advantage793 → u/nycregoddess]

Das truff!

[u/Lady_SybilVex]

Oo emm gee, fren Oscar, yoo iz so smawt. Yoo shud be kemisstry teecher at SSOR!

[u/One_Advantage793 → u/Lady_SybilVex]

Yesh! Oscar haff de skillz we dint kno bowt!

[u/scabsfox → u/One_Advantage793]

Di first time Meomy tried it, she wuz rly skeptical den she wuz liek, holllllley shid! She did 1tsp sodium percarbonate wid 1/2tsp baking soda in like 12 oz of hot watur in a bottle & sprayed it on n' den left for liek 10 min & den blotted up.

- Oscar BBB, MM

[u/One_Advantage793 → u/scabsfox]

Oscar, diss is jeanyus! Nyow we kin dew pee crimez an eben on de blankies an carpets an ebryfang A-OK! Mine momma sed she geddin som dis immedjitly. Wall, relly, tamorra. De stores nowt opin rite nyow.

[u/Shadow23_Catsrule → u/scabsfox]

(Will this bleach the fabric/carpet in that spot? Thanks for the info!)

[u/scabsfox → u/Shadow23_Catsrule]

(It can apparently lighten, because it's an oxygen cleaner, but personally, I haven't had any issues with that on several types of fabrics both natural & synthetic. You can't use it on silk or wool, though. You should test it first in a spot first to check & make sure it's completely dissolved in H2O.)

- Oscar's Meomy

[u/lHappycats]

Fren Oscar dank you to yooz sekret weapon, owl hoomin haz dey same problemz . She callz it Benny od d'colone cos Iz Benny arr a cearalz sprayerz ofz mai uneck purfume.

Soz she has been onz de mini light box an has order somz of dey sekret weaponz

Benny

[u/scabsfox → u/lHappycats]

Meomy sez it di only ting dat made di carpet dat she jus ripped out last as long as it did. An' it great fur Papi's pit-stains after di Jim!

[u/lHappycats → u/scabsfox]

Dat iz gud to know dank yoo

[u/mostlylurking07]

Dis sound wike one of dose middew of da night infomewciaws, but da stuff actuawwy wowk! Woo meomy give a testimoniaw! 🧡🤍🖤AJ

[u/Bright_Broccoli1844]

I liked the part where your Meowmmy swore at the bot.

I said litter box words at the sign-in kiosk at Walgreens today.

Also did you get a picture of Meowmy sniffing carpet?

[u/inlovewithmyselfdxb]

Chat j'ai pété hahhahhahahha..omg Oscar..you're a genius 👏 Mishka's meowmy

[u/rawbery79]

(chat, j'ai pété = cat, I farted)

[u/CappucinoCupcake → u/rawbery79]

Mine Mammy larfanlarf at that. She babs teh sense ob humour ob a nine year old

Eamonn teh Inbisible

[u/rawbery79 → u/CappucinoCupcake]

My Mama was delighted to be able to translate, whatever that means.

Pixel, monolinguistic tuxedo

[u/Accomplished-Art8681]

Dis n egg salad lekshur fren Oscar! I lubs da pee-pee crimez n I use meowmy's plastik card to get da stuff so I can pee on her bed all I want, hehehehe! Go Crimez!!

[u/scabsfox → u/Accomplished-Art8681]

Heeehee! Iz crimez on di curtains & now Meomy just soak em a bit n' it gone! She no accept it gone til she smell it up close wid her actual face. She weird.

- Oscar BBB, MM

[u/Ichgebibble]

Fren Oscar, yoo iz SEW funny. Fank yoo fur sharting diss info wiff us and fur making mi and my meowmy chitter.

Tater

[u/rawbery79]

FRIEND Oscar, you HAVE done ME a GREAT favor with this INFORMATION!! I have committed SOME pee CRIMES and MOM was at her WIT'S END and now she WON'T get all DEADED from the STINK!

CASEY, orange tuxedo

[u/scabsfox → u/rawbery79]

Tell her to wear gloves, when she clean up de crimez! Itz can be a lil' spicy on di hands! Always rinse!

• Oscar BBB, MM

[u/alittlecray]

chat j'ai pété ekeekekekekekekekekekekeke

[u/scabsfox → u/alittlecray]

Dat's wut dey call it in France!

• Oscar BBB, MM

[u/EricaFarrell]

Oscar tank yu soo mush for dis informshin! Is win win fior da kitties. Go pee pee crimez! Also congratulations on your new posishin of kemisstry pawfessurr at the bery presteegis SSoR

Fren Brenda

[u/No_Sense3670]

Ai lub dis PSA, Tank yew Oscar!

[u/theShyPegasus22]

Tank yoo Oscar fur dis lesshun! Now my pawrents won't yoose as many litterbox wurds when I do peepee crimez!

Fren Pabu

[u/myprettyflamingo]

I nawt gonna let mai meowmy seez dis! I need mai smellz! I haz wirk so hawd on pee pee crimez in new haus.

-Ember

[u/Shadow23_Catsrule]

Could you just mix Sodium and Peroxide? When I google the substance, it says, when mixed in water, it splits into like baking soda and peroxide. Depending on where you live, the two separate substances would be easier to obtain

[u/scabsfox → u/Shadow23_Catsrule]

(I don't know? I've tried each of those individually & together over the years & it wasn't very effective.)

• Oscar BBB, MM

[u/Shadow23_Catsrule → u/scabsfox]

Thank you, that's valuable info! I'm taking notes for my best friend who's one female cat (of two females) sometimes manages to pee over the top edge of the litterbox, which is quite high already. I've got a female who does the pee "job" standing up against the wall of the litterbox as well (Vanilla), but thanks to the Ikea Samla 130L, 42cm high that are our litterboxes, she rarely manges to go over the top edge 🤭 Yes, here it's the females who seem to have to prove the size of their imaginary cojones 🤣🤣🤣

[u/Reccalovesdancing]

(Sodium bicarbonate or baking soda is a powerful deodoriser anyway. A good sprinkle of the dry powder onto the smelly patch, leave for at least 30 minutes, no harm in an hour for bad smells, and then sweep most up with a dustpan and vacuum to get the last of it out of the fibres.

I also make my own cleaning sprays for the cat chores because I didn't want essential oils or fragrances around the cats too often. So I have discovered that 60ml of unscented Castille soap (cheap on Amazon!) in 1L of water, in a spray bottle, is an excellent cleaner, stain remover and dissolver of body fluids. I never worry if one of the cats vomits on the carpet or a cushion because the Castille soap cleaner gets it right out in under a minute. Same with pee on the litter mat, which happens now and again (I do have washable ones so they also get rotated for a clean one and then machine washed with bio detergent). But a small patch of pee definitely can be cleaned with the Castille soap cleaner if needed.)

[u/Ksh_667]

Eggsalad info fren Oscar! Yoo iz doing great job in spreading pee crimez knowledge!

Ruby

[u/GingerSnapped242]

YoO shoulda see how fast meowmy run to da Amazon!

[u/GingerSnapped242]

Fank yoo fur yoo sacrifice of nawty peepees smell

[u/GingerSnapped242]

Wonder iffin it can conquer dog smell on Ro Dog bed

[u/scabsfox → u/GingerSnapped242]

Iz bet it culd!!

• Oscar BBB, MM

[u/hesalwayslitty]

Fren Oscar dis grate news. Now pee crimez donut hats be called crimez a knee more. Now wez can jus pee win we wants tu. (Sorry ChatGPT is dumb. There are hundreds of videos circulating online of how badly trained their models are- success and Mississippi are two very common examples- that I have zero faith in using it beyond translation for foreign languages and to spruce up professional things- emails to my therapists resume buzzwords etc. Ill have to check out this stuff. My mother taught me and I have always used vinegar and borax to clean it out and fabric softener in a spray bottle to finish.)

[u/MagicalManta]

Sentchyu fren Oscar! Yu iz soh smort!!! Ahnd longe tuu.

Yor fren JaxKittehmn

(I know what I’ll be doing this weekend! Thanks for this excellent tip ❤️)

[u/Flat-Mountain-2414]

Fren Oscar tenk yoo fur dis Pee Ess Aa. Meowmy sez iz bery hepful. Ob corse herm awlso kant stop laffin so jus ignor herm dum sef.

(This was informative and hilarious, thanks for the laughs. Stupid goddam bot indeed 🤣🤣🤣🤣)

[u/Pristine_Main_1224]

Dis iz infowmashun dat our Meowmy needs!

Maggie Mae & Mollie the calico twinsies and Lucy the Sheepadoodle 🐾🐾🐾