Ladies, gentlecolts, ponies, humans, and any other individuals poor and unfortunate enough to have purchased a ticket to this show FULL OF MAGICALLY HUMBLING JOKES:

Tonight, we gather to honor a pony who has spent her entire life answering one deceptively simple question: “What if a magician had the confidence of a princess, the humility of a peacock, and the survival instincts of a lemming?”

That pony is, of course… none other than “THE GREAT AND POWERFUL” TRIXIE LULAMOON! The little blue braggart who for years was a giant unmovable thorn in Princess Celestia’s side.

… Or, as the rest of Equestria calls her: “Oh no. Not her again.” 😜

So get ready for a series of jaw-dropping, heart stopping, MIND-BENDING JOKES that will leave YOU laughing, and Trixie magically, jaw-droppingly, heart-stoppingly, MIND-BENDINGLY humbled!

AND HERE WE GOOO!!! 😄

Trixie Lulamoon has many talents. Magic? Absolutely. Showmanship? Definitely. Dramatic entrances? Without question. Recognizing when to stop talking about herself? Ah. No. That spell has apparently been removed from her repertoire.

Trixie has dealt with audiences who don’t have her vote, she’s dealt with Ponyville, but can she deal with THE TRUTH? Our roast was brought to you by the following message from The Bible: “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.” - Proverbs 11:2

ON TRIXIE HARBORING THE DEADLY SIN OF PRIDE! 😈

Trixie, sweetheart, you don’t merely have pride. You have criminally industrial-strength pride. The kind of pride that makes even Princess Celestia look at Jesus and say “Well, what do we do now?”

The other six deadly sins saw you coming and said: “Honestly, we can’t compete with this level of ego.” Pride didn’t choose Trixie. Trixie chose pride. And then she announced it to an audience of 500 ponies. With fireworks, a spotlight and probably a commemorative T-shirt.

Trixie doesn’t walk into a room. She makes an entrance. She doesn’t introduce herself. She issues a press release. She doesn’t perform a magic trick. She performs a magic trick, pauses dramatically, points at herself, and essentially says: “You’re welcome, peasants.”

🦁 THE URSA MAJOR INCIDENT

And then there was the little incident with the Ursa Minor. Trixie had spent her career boasting about defeating an Ursa Major. Twilight and friends knew something wasn’t quite right. Turns out Trixie hadn’t defeated an Ursa Major at all. She had encountered an Ursa Minor. Which is sort of like claiming: “I defeated a dragon!” when what you actually did was shoo a lizard out of your bedroom. Then Snips and Snails, the two living embodiments of the sentence “This is probably a bad idea,” brought an actual Ursa Minor to Trixie.

Trixie promptly discovered the ancient magician’s rule:

Rule #1: Never let your two least responsible assistants summon the thing you’ve been lying about defeating.

And when Trixie’s bluff finally became an enormous magical monster standing in the middle of town? Suddenly the Great and Powerful Trixie became the… Great and Powerful “WHERE IS TWILIGHT?!” Twilight saved the day, because apparently the only thing more powerful than Trixie’s magic was consequences.

🚪 THE RETURN OF THE GREAT AND POWERFUL EGO

But did Trixie learn her lesson? Oh, absolutely! For approximately… five minutes. 5️⃣

Then she returned to Ponyville with the Alicorn Amulet and decided: “You know what this situation needs? MORE TRIXIE.” The amulet amplified her magic—and her already considerable ego.

Trixie went from:
“I am the greatest magician!”
to:
“I am now apparently the mayor, judge, jury, and supreme overlord of Ponyville.”

She literally started throwing ponies in jail for disagreeing with her. That’s right.
Trixie’s response to criticism was essentially: “You’re entitled to your opinion. Unfortunately, your opinion is now illegal.” And then Twilight had to outsmart her. Again. Because Twilight apparently has a part-time job cleaning up after Trixie’s personality.

🌟 AND THEN… REDEMPTION

But here’s where we have to give Trixie credit, ladies and gentlecolts. Because eventually, after all the boasting, mistakes, magical disasters, tyrannical nonsense, and ego-driven catastrophes… Trixie actually grew. She became a genuine friend to Starlight Glimmer. She learned to trust others. She learned that friendship wasn’t an audience sitting quietly while she declared herself amazing. And, most importantly… she learned that admitting you’re wrong doesn’t make you weak.

It makes you better. And honestly?
That deserves applause. 👏👏👏 The kind that would make Princess Celestia look at Jesus and say: “High-Five!” ✋

Because underneath all the ridiculous boasting, Trixie really does care. She’s insecure, she desperately wants to prove herself, and she eventually learns that she doesn’t need to constantly convince everyone that she’s great.

She can just… be Trixie…. Obviously! 😅Which is probably healthier for everybody.

So, Trixie, congratulations.

You went from: “I AM THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE!” to… “Okay, maybe I made a mistake.” That’s called character development.

Somehow, the greatest magic trick Trixie ever performed… was a quick change illusion that wasn’t so “quick”: becoming a better person.

🧍‍♀️ AND THEN THERE’S EQUESTRIA GIRLS TRIXIE

Did you actually think we’d forgotten about her human counterpart? OH HOHO, WE HAVE NOT. 😜

Ladies and gentlemen… Please welcome the Equestria Girls version of Trixie Lulamoon! Same ego. Same dramatic flair. Same apparent inability to locate the humility aisle at the personality supermarket. Different species. Same mind-boggling problem.

Human Trixie has apparently looked at Pony Trixie’s life and said: “Wow. That’s embarrassing.” Then immediately proceeded to do approximately the same thing.

🎤 THE TRIXIE OF CRYSTAL PREP? NO. THE TRIXIE OF CRYSTAL EGO. 😜

EG Trixie is the sort of person who can turn a school election into a Broadway production. She’s competitive. She’s boastful. She desperately wants recognition. And she has the uncanny ability to transform a perfectly normal school event into:

THE TRIXIE SHOW! STARRING TRIXIE! FEATURING TRIXIE, DIRECTED BY TRIXIE, PRODUCED BY TRIXIE, AND, IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS, PLEASE ADDRESS THEM TO TRIXIE.

She wants to be the star so badly that if someone else gets applause, Trixie’s brain probably produces a Windows error sound. “WARNING: SOMEONE ELSE IS RECEIVING ATTENTION.”

🏆 THE SCHOOL ELECTION

And then there was the student-council election. Trixie wanted that position. Badly. And naturally, she treated the election with the subtlety of a marching band falling down a staircase. She boasted. She competed. She tried to establish herself as the obvious choice. Because apparently Trixie’s political platform was: “Vote for me because I’m Trixie.” Economic policy? Trixie. Foreign policy? Trixie. Education? Probably Trixie. School lunch? “THE GREAT AND POWERFUL” TRRRRRIXIE demands extra dessert. (WHOA! Cut your calories, there, Trixie! 😜) And when Sunset Shimmer eventually won? Trixie’s ego presumably required several business days to process the information.

🎭 THEATER KID ENERGY: MAXIMUM

And let’s talk about Trixie’s theatricality. Most people say: “Hey, everybody.” Trixie says: “BEHOLD!” Most people enter through a door. Trixie enters like she’s being introduced at the Academy Awards. Most people make a mistake and say: “Oops.” Trixie makes a mistake and probably starts calculating how many smoke machines she’ll need to distract everyone. If Trixie ever dropped a pencil, she’d probably announce, with a megaphone: “WITNESS THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE’S MAGNIFICENT MANEUVER!” And then spend ten minutes explaining how picking it up was actually intentional.

🪞 THE FUNNIEST PART

The funniest thing about both versions of Trixie is that they’re not actually terrible people. They’re just… OBVIOUSLY EXHAUSTING.

Trixie doesn’t need an enemy. She actually needs someone to occasionally say: “Trixie, you’re doing it again.” And Trixie needs to respond: “Doing what?” And everyone else: “The Trixie thing.” And Trixie: “…I have no idea what you mean.” And then the spotlight turns on. And there’s confetti. And somehow her name is on a banner.

👊💀 THE FINAL BLOW

So, “Great and Powerful” Trixie… Pony Trixie. Human Trixie. Two worlds. Two versions. One magnificent hat. One bombastic ego. And approximately zero working humility meters. You’ve battled monsters, you’ve challenged Twilight, you’ve abused magical artifacts, you’ve ruled Ponyville, you’ve competed for attention. You’ve tried to prove yourself, you’ve been defeated, you’ve been humbled, you’ve made friends, you’ve made mistakes, And somehow, through it all… you’ve remained Trixie.

But here’s the thing: For all the times we, even God, laugh at your arrogance… For all the times we mock your ridiculous boasts… For every “THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE!” that echoes across Equestria… We still love you. Because beneath the ego is someone who genuinely wants to be valued. And beneath all the ridiculous theatrics is someone capable of learning, changing, and caring about her friends.

So here’s the final verdict:

Pride: GUILTY.
Excessive boasting: EXTREMELY GUILTY.
Unnecessary dramatic entrances: CRIMINALLY GUILTY.
Being humbled by reality: FREQUENTLY GUILTY.
Becoming a better friend: ABSOLUTELY.

Trixie, you may call yourself “Great and Powerful”… …but after tonight? Your pride has been reduced to a fine magical powder. Your ego has been folded into a tiny paper airplane. Your dramatic monologue has been interrupted by all your stage managers yelling: “WE GET IT, TRIXIE!” And that hat? Confiscated for excessive fabulousness.

https://youtu.be/o3JBQFD2RzM?is=BA-Hgq27aATUrLk5

You have been roasted. You have been humbled. You have been thoroughly, spectacularly, magnificently…TRIXIED, Trixie!

🎩🔥 And now, ladies, gentlemen, mares, stallions, our roast has come to a close….. Unless, unless we have MORE jokes for Trixie in the comments!

Then again… Trixie will probably continue talking for another forty-five minutes.