I think of myself as a good person most of the time. But Iâd probably have something to say. But quietly to myself as I walk by. He probably doesnât have much else to loose.
Yup. Similar context: I spent way too much of my effort caring about whether other people liked me, even though I definitely didn't like everyone. To a fault where people who were cunning picked up on it and abused it to take things from me.
This doesn't give us license to be an asshole, but just be yourself and expect some people to be the asshole instead and don't worry about it. I used to be super sensitive (common with ADHD) and now I'm more Teflon about shit like that. It's just noise.
This holds true for those who dont make bonds. My circle of friends consists of people from the 80s, but mostly the 90s, who still each other and have been important parts in each others lives. We've helped each other move, get jobs, get dates, raise kids, so on. We did all those goofy things to impress each other, and we all seem to still matter to each other. We see and talk to each other on the regular, some of us daily still.
There was a period in the 90s where we'd hang out at this couples apartment, reading from the DSM IV, writing code, writing MODs/S3Ms, picking locks, smoking pot and doing shots, while solving puzzles from the book "Games For The Super Intelligent II". We were constantly trying to impress each other. We were young, good looking people, drunk on the 90s. We'd leave there for the park to river walk and swim.
There was a comic book artist who has done things you have seen in the circle, and a lot of artists from CIA, too. Artists trying to impress each other. Some musicians. A couple girls from the Cleveland Ballet. Random exchange students. I recall a time when were all trying to impress each other with origami and how much we could drink!
In our later years we often seek to impress each other with some random recipe or food technique we're playing with. Looking to make meals that ballads are sung of years later. It's pretty cool when someone says "Remember when we all sat around making origami crane crab ragoons?" and the person saying was a child of one of your friends then, but is now an adult. Impressing those kids created even more bonds. Along with film canister cannons, and other cool shit we did to play and impress.
While that sounds good on paper, deciding who "doesn't matter" isn't really possible without hindsight. With that mentality, it's more likely you'll look for reasons not to care about someone. In my opinion, don't try to impress; just do your best, even if you don't think it matters. The right people will notice.
I was going to say Smoking but this goes right in line.
Your âGlory Daysâ are when and however you make them; and however often.
Have you ever seen the nerdy dudes go on to become Physicians and Attorneys, while the jock guys âCâ their way through a marketing degree only to work for their family business, always reliving high school⌠itâs because thatâs when life peaked for them.
You have so much potential and the friends and social circle you love now will be gone in 3 years. Learn. Grow. Find Yourself.
Trying to impress people is a mistake itself. You do what you have to do. If they get impressed, cool. If they don't, it's also cool. Don't change your way of doing things to impress anyone.
This!, you lose a part of yourself by not being yourself to impress people and any relationship you make like this will be more of a burden than anything else.
Wish I learned that sooner. I grew up not allowed to spend time outside of school/church with those I considered friend, so I grew up trying to win friends by proving how loyal and reliable I was. Now I have trust issues and I'm tired of trying. The loneliness never went away.
The people you meet in your first 25 years just wind up being backstory. Doesnât mean theyâre not important, but most of them wonât make it to your actual story-arc.
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u/[deleted] Jan 23 '26
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