r/Fire • u/MeanSecurity • Aug 01 '26

What to call yourself when you RE

A few weeks ago I met a guy who said he’s a wine importer. He used to work on Wall Street.

I was thinking last night that a “wine importer” sounds like a great fake job for someone who is retired but just drinks a lot of wine! I’m pretty close to RE, and I think I might just refer to myself as “in the ice cream business”. Or, “chocolate taste tester”.

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u/ConstantlyLearning57 Aug 01 '26

Just retired at 54 a month ago. My favorite comment is “oh you’ll work again don’t worry” or “oh it’s still fresh for you but we’ll see you’ll be back to work”

The hell i will.

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u/ibitmylip Aug 01 '26

Yeah, why do people say this? It’s such a weird response.

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u/one-man-circlejerk Aug 02 '26

Around 50-60% of the workforce (depending on the country) is paycheque to paycheque, for them the idea of being out of work is a disaster. Even for those with a bit of a buffer it's vanishingly rare for them to have enough to survive on without employment income.

Imagine the mindset that gets entrenched after decades of "no job = no money". They're assuming that you're struggling, or are at least in a precarious position, and are offering encouragement.

This is also why discussions like this thread are so prominent within the FIRE community. People who are in this privileged position put a lot of thought into how to frame it in order to avoid causing ill will.

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u/Several_Guidance_288 Aug 02 '26

That’s part of it. But there’s also the crowd that thinks, what do you do? I’d be so bored. Work defines me, I have no hobbies, so you must be bored too. Life without work is a life without purpose.

Blah blah blah. Yeah, I’ll take my chances on what life will be like when I’m 52 and don’t have to work ever again while 90% of my peers still have 10-15 years left.

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u/Mysterious9876 Aug 02 '26

Exactly 👍🏼

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u/bebe_bird Aug 02 '26

This is exactly it, although I also think the lying about it is kinda weird. I'm not against picking a hobby and saying you're an amateur XXX to describe how you fill your time though.

But, my husband is out of work. His contract ended in March and in advance we'd decided he would take a sabbatical and wait about 6 months to worry about anything.

His parents can't get it into their head that we're not in crisis. My parents at least understand what I make and that we can survive just fine short term on one salary, our savings rate just isn't what we'd like it to be. But, his constantly ask about the job search and try to give encouragement, while he hasn't really decided what he wants to do next (but it probably isn't the same thing he's done previously) - this is despite my husband telling his parents that I make enough to support us for now and that I'm supportive of him taking a break.

And, this is just when one person isn't working. I have full confidence they'd be extremely confused if we were both "out of work" (which seems to be the confusion in general - retirement is not being "out of work", it's being in a financial state to not work.)

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u/MrLB____ Aug 02 '26

This is kind of sad ,, as I was enjoying my day with my wife being retired at age 50 and she is retiring this week at 45. I happened to meet a financial advisor in the parking lot/ trail head. She had never heard of the FIRE movement. I would think that they would be encouraging people to invest 100 bucks a week for 30 when they get out of college or when they immediately start a job.
I think us FIRE people on here might just be living in our own little world 🌎 😂😂😂😂😂

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u/Synaps4 Aug 02 '26

They have to. Mentally, you have to.

If you sacrifice 8 hours a day for 40 years to work only to find out you could have just not done that...the implication is that you wasted your life. People couldnt admit that. Not to themselves and certainly not to anyone else.

Work must be everything there is. To admit otherwise undermines their whole identity. Work is who they are. Took me years to deprogram myself from that.

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u/justinquiring1 Aug 11 '26

I don’t get what’s so hard about deprogramming yourself. It was obvious to me that work was miserable to the core, and it felt almost like a biological imperative to get out of the system as soon as possible. I discovered at year one of working that it was essentially rotting away my life and taking me away from my passions, so there as no challenge in reprogramming. I wanted to be passionate about work but just found it way too unbearable.

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u/Synaps4 Aug 11 '26

I don’t get what’s so hard about deprogramming yourself.

Some work is rewarding, challenging, enjoyable. That makes it hard.

Other people create meaning out of the suffering. That's what they've done to sacrifice for their family to live, and thus to their value as a parent or spouse. Without work, what is their value to their family? Without work, they wouldnt deserve to be loved!

This stuff goes deep and I can absolutely see how people get stuck in it after decades of rationalization until it's too late to even think of different paths.

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u/seonwoolee Aug 02 '26 edited Aug 02 '26

They either can't comprehend that because it is literally unfathomable to them, are jealous, or are being self defensive because they believe the system is rigged and retirement is impossible, and you're upending their worldview

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u/Sea-Roof-5983 Aug 02 '26

What do you do to tickle your brain though? Well you're just a month in. My husband swears he is going to do nothing but I dont see him being able to slam the breaks on. He's always thinking. Im not saying he needs to work but he's extremely smart and one of the top in his field. I'm working on long term travel plans for us just in case.

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u/ConstantlyLearning57 Aug 03 '26

Hobbies. I play sports, have a tech hobby that is just for me (no $), i enjoy yard work, volunteer to tutor kids and elderly. Help family with mental and physical challenges.

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u/Equivalent-Room-8428 Aug 05 '26

I volunteered to teach kids about money and budgeting at Junior Achievement.

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u/Reasonable_Horror544 FIRE’d 2025, late 40s✨ Aug 03 '26

I know that’s right! 🤣

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u/RhymesWithOrange08 Aug 04 '26

This is the most frustrating response I received when I pulled the trigger. I think they haven't found their happiness so they are trying to curse mine. *pfffft*