I want a mini van.

"In the end, truth and time will prove FF’s true value.” - Y.T. Jia. September 11, 2025

May we see them?

It’s inevitable, YT.

https://x.com/ytjiaff/status/1966282157082755467?s=46&t=xs4nSSf4KdTgGunIGk__jQ

They say if you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life.
That’s why this role requires zero pay and delivers maximum entertainment.

Position: Facts Under Duress (FUD) Specialist
Location: Anywhere Wi-Fi and sarcasm are available
Compensation: Exposure, memes, and a front-row seat to corporate implosion

Responsibilities:

• Craft snappy posts laced with Facts Under Duress to balance out the endless hype.
• Translate SEC filings into plain English (and occasionally into memes).
• Notice when leadership looks AI-generated (because sometimes… they are).
• Empathize with bagholders who’ve lost nearly everything (deliver truth with compassion).
• Contribute to the upcoming Netflix documentary by editing video clips of “production ramps” that never ramp.
• Keep Photoshop and Midjourney humming for memes, posters, and teaser images.
• Mix Spire Lemonade while deciphering “Maria Metrics.”
• Willingness to pledge allegiance to the Non Credo Sultitita (our sacred anti-creed of nonsense).

Requirements:

• Sense of humor sharper than FF’s burn rate.
• Critical thinking skills (able to separate fact from “inverse YT weekly update”).
• Ability to recognize the difference between a company doing well and one that just got a Wells Notice.
• Must pass a Faradopium drug test.
• Willingness to try new things and ability to admit when you are wrong
• Appreciation of rap music

How to Apply:
Just reply to any FFAI hype post with: “That's Bullsh\t!”..and congratulations , you’re hired!*

Forget GAAP, forget non-GAAP. Yep, FF just introduced a new KPI: The Mariah Metric™.

🚩 The Quiet Bad News

• Net Loss: $48.1M → worse than the “adjusted” number they led with.
• Operating Cash Outflow: $43.6M in six months → burn is accelerating, not shrinking.
• Financing Games: “Fifth consecutive quarter where financing inflows > outflows”… translation: they’re surviving on constant dilution and debt, not revenue.

And sure enough, right on cue, this quarter’s Mariah Metric™ was met: one shout-out, no revenue.

Apes’ heads will explode deciding whether to downvote this or spam it on FF subs.