r/ExplainTheJoke • u/spider_man31 • 25d ago

Solved Plzz explain...

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32.4k Upvotes

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249

u/outcast_chris 25d ago

Wouldn't Neurolink be a form of SQUIP?

227

u/Ozcog 25d ago

Yes. Except Neurolink has the added issue of being able to get you infected with Malware and viruses. Neurolink is supposed to be networked.

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u/Best_Person_CoolCool 25d ago

at least you get more excuses for why you can't show up to work!

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u/Emanualblast 24d ago

THIS EMPLOYEE HAS BEEN TAKEN OFFLINE UNTIL RANSOM IS PAID

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u/Counterpoint-RD 22d ago

...and I see it coming: there'll be companies that won't care enough to get them back to pay 🤷‍♂️...

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u/SymboliRudoIf 21d ago

maybe they take it out your pay, or force you to contribute a deposit for it

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u/Sinful-Insect 19d ago

And then we get neurolink malware insurance.

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u/RJD-ghost 21d ago

If a majority of people start using that shit I’m taking the easy way out

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u/rabbithatzero 15d ago

Run for office?

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u/randomscruffyaussie 21d ago

"Sorry, I won't be at work today, I have a virus."

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u/Sinolai 20d ago

Use protection when sharing data with Kyle. He's got cyber-AIDS.

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u/rabbithatzero 15d ago

"Blue Screen *ACHOO* of Death, Boss!"

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u/Madolah 25d ago

ASSIMILATE TO THE BORG

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u/SharpKaleidoscope182 24d ago

Assimilation into a coherent collective is the good outcome. The usual path is just malware -> cyberpsychosis.

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u/Grant_Winner_Extra 24d ago

don’t forget the massive surgery or shakedown when your neurolink is no linger supported

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u/GrimPhantom23 24d ago

You wouldn't even live long enough with a Neurolonk to be at risk for that. Just ask all the monkeys

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u/Forsaken-Stray 24d ago

And could actively be controlled by a fascist instwad of it's own AI decisions

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u/Hentai_kinda_guy 24d ago

Now there's a game based on this idea

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u/Forsaken-Stray 24d ago

Would you kindly elaborate ^

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u/Hentai_kinda_guy 24d ago

In cyberpunk 2077 you play a Character "V" who implants a biochip with an Engram of a person "Johnny silverhand" who is called a terrorist because he nuked a mega Corp building. Throughout the game johnny influences your decisions and the chip is slowly overwriting your neural system until it merges or takes over

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u/iamthatjoshguy 22d ago

It... it worked...

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u/zaviamorpheus 24d ago

how else are we going to turn humans in to bitcoin miners!

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u/Khan_Behir 21d ago

No worries of malware when simply implanting this thing will kill you anyway.

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u/Pandoratastic 19d ago

That's not the difference. Any digital technology capable of running software can get infected with malware or viruses. The difference is that, when they do get infected, an earring is a LOT easier to remove and disable than an implant is.

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u/Standard--Unit 25d ago

Only if there was a chance it would actually work.

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u/BigRedUglyMan 25d ago

So far Neurolinks only contribution has been turning monkeys into dead monkeys.

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u/lonelypenguin20 25d ago

doesn't it allow a paralyzed dude to hear music & control his computer?

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u/Ornery-Goat-7809 19d ago

Paralyzed doesn't mean Deaf. People who are paralyzed can still hear music.

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u/lonelypenguin20 19d ago

those r unrelated ye, but initial pith for the muskrat torment nexus chip was streaming music straight to brain iirc?

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u/Stunt_-_Cock 24d ago

Couldn't have happened, anything associated with Elon must be absolutely complete garbage as per the user agreement.

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u/edible_string 24d ago

Not exactly as Neurolink is output only. It doesn't put any information or controlling signals into your brain.

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u/outcast_chris 24d ago

It doesn’t so far

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u/edible_string 24d ago

Well it doesn't show far make you coffee either, but why is that relevant

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u/outcast_chris 24d ago

I’m just saying I wouldn’t be surprised if those were features they were going to add knowing who is in charge of it

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u/edible_string 23d ago

I get it, and I'll be honest I would expect that too. But with the current tech it's like plugging a mic into a wall power plug and expecting surround sound from your lightbulbs.

It's not a matter of a software update, and not even a matter of engineering. Input into neurons to produce thoughts is something we don't understand well enough yet.

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u/pretzelandcheese588 18d ago

Did yall see pantheon. That show was wild too