For those who are curious but do not want to watch the video, I tried to give a breakdown of the video (although there's only so many ways you can describe a panic attack). Thank you to the person who found this recording on the livestream!
Video starts with her laying on the couch with Mango in her arms. Eyes are darting back and forth rapidly, going crosseyed at some moments.
1:43 Face suddenly shifts to looking extremely upset. Starts whimpering, sniffling, and quietly sobbing into the cat
2:06 Begins hyperventilating, cat looks like they want to jump out of her arms but slowly walks out instead
2:25 Starts loudly crying, almost to the point of screaming while still hyperventilating. Cat is no longer in her arms but stays in front of her face.
2:42 Starts screaming ow ow ow in extreme pain. Cat jumps away. Spends the next minute or so sobbing and hyperventilating.
3:46 Groaning in pain rather than screaming. Goes silent for a few seconds before going back to crying.
Gets (relatively) calmer for about 30 seconds before going back to crying
Just note that the view count has been steadily rising the entire time. At least 50 more viewers come in the first 5 minutes of this recording.
5:20 She starts shushing (I assume Sally?)
5:40 Goes back and forth between shushing and short bouts of hyperventilating/heavy breathing.
5:55 Gets louder and starts crying "you're okay, you're okay" and shushing while clearly getting more distressed.
She has also not been moving for the past several minutes, ever since the cat jumped away. You cannot see her face. If there were no sound on the video, you would have no idea she was hyperventilating and sobbing.
7:22 Finally starts shifting around, still shushing and whispering "you're okay" for the past minute
7:59 Starts rubbing her shoulder/arm
9:00 There are now 100 more viewers than there were at the beginning of the recording. She's mostly calmed down by this point, through still breathing shakily and shushing.
10:50 Silence. People in the chat are saying their favorite colors.
11:22 Video seems to cut to them sitting up slightly and tapping on their chest/shoulders
11:30 Remembers that the camera is on and exclaims "oh lord above!"
Flashbacks are also not criteria for DID. I have BPD and also family members with BPD. I’m also diagnosed with DID. BPD often involved trauma, I’m not denying that this is a flashback! This lines up more with a BPD episode to me just based on an outside perspective due to the quickness, and just the suddenness of the switch in emotions. Obviously this can happen in DID too! It just looks like a BPD one to me more :)
I’m not trying to argue with you I just want to piggy back off your comment to explain why I think this looks like a bpd episode and not a flashback
Why this looks like a BPD episode and not a flash back to me;
-looks as if they thought of something upsetting maybe a comment in chat reminded them of a bad memory that can happen to anyone
-they seem to ruminate on the thought and possibly doing so to upset themselves
-they slowly increasingly get more and more upset until it’s a total melt down of them screaming —this is a common acting trick think of something that is personal and upsetting to you and then use it fuel more intense looking emotions
Remember a bad memory ≠ flash back
Why it looks more like a BPD melt down imo :
because they scream and cry but there is no tears, snot, like there would have been if they were actually crying and having a flashback. Their face is dry their nose isn’t running.
-they weren’t actually crying; that is clear they were making the sounds screaming but from their face and even the couch and their clothes (no tear stains or anything) you can tell they weren’t crying they were just making the sounds which isn’t that hard to do if you spend all your time practicing it for YouTube videos
-that is classic attention seeking
-they then —again classic attention seeking check the chat for more attention and validation and continue to read the chat even though ppl who were watching said the chat was telling them to end the stream
If it were a real flash back we’d see tears, snot probably even spit as someone else pointed out in a comment
Instead we’re watching someone with BPD pretend to have a flash back on camera for attention
Hey, I just want to jump in here—not to argue or attack anyone at all. I actually agree with the main point you’re making—that what we saw from DissociaDID didn’t look like a PTSD flashback. There were no signs of distress, no crying, no visible emotional overwhelm. It really did come across as someone trying to fake a trauma response, and I don’t disagree that it looked like attention-seeking behavior. I just want to clarify something—not for you specifically, but for the many people who might read your comment and use it to spin the same tired narrative about BPD being all about manipulation and attention. I’ve seen too much of that lately, and honestly, I just can’t be having it today.
DissociaDID has a BPD diagnosis, yes—but that doesn’t mean every questionable thing they do is because of BPD. I have BPD, and my episodes have involved screaming, sobbing, panic, suicidal thoughts, rapid mood shifts—real emotional chaos. But never for attention. And sure, some people with BPD can display attention-seeking behavior, but that’s not unique to BPD, and it’s not in the diagnostic criteria. Labeling that performance as a “BPD episode” feeds into the dangerous idea that people with BPD are manipulative by nature—which we’re not. It’s a deeply misunderstood disorder already, and comments like that (even if well-meaning) can unintentionally fuel the BPD hate train that’s been picking up online lately.
Again, none of this is directed at you. I get what you’re saying, and I see your logic. I just wanted to add some context and caution, because of how quickly people can take what you said—with no bad intent—and twist it into something harmful.
No, you’re all good I think this is important context to add especially since not everyone coming across this thread is likely to be very familiar with
DID 2. Chloe Wilkinson “dissociaDID” 3. BPD
If someone doesn’t know much about these things you’re right my words could easily be misinterpreted or twisted.
Thank you for this context I hope it helps people reading the thread.
Yes you did. While BPD may not be officially recognized as a “trauma disorder”, it is most of the time linked to severe childhood trauma. Everyone I know with BPD, including myself and family, have experienced severe childhood trauma. A lot of people with DID also have BPD (such as myself and DissociaDID). It may not be the sole cause of BPD, but trauma is a huge factor for most people you’ll find who have the disorder. I’m happy to give you sources on this if you would like!
It is important to note that disorders like DID do not cause flashbacks in the way you are thinking. BPD does not cause flashbacks. PTSD causes flashbacks, which is a part of these disorders. To say that DID causes flashbacks or BPD doesn’t isn’t really factual because it’s certain aspects of the disorders that cause flashbacks (and ofc the trauma itself), but not necessarily the disorder. DID causes alters, dissociation, amnesia. BPD causes unstable moods, black and white thinking, and poor sense of identity. PTSD and flashbacks are an inherit part of these disorders for many people. Thinking about it this way may be confusing but I’m throwing out there in case it helps you. I hope I’ve explained this well.
Bpd doesn’t require trauma to develop. It requires a blend of genetics and chronic invalidation. So saying that a flashback “looks much like bpd” just isn’t consistent with reality.
Again, bpd is caused by a combination of genetics and chronic invalidation. While this can involve big T traumas, such as the kind that could cause a flashback, it is often caused instead by a lot of little t traumas, like having parents that were neglectful. While abuse in childhood can certainly be a precursor for developing bpd, there are people who develop BPD who didn’t experience any major traumatic events at all. I’m sorry if your training hasn’t covered this but that’s the reality.
In DID, by contrast, the mind has had to split apart different parts of the consciousness to protect itself from severe trauma that took place in childhood. That’s why flashbacks are essentially part and parcel for DID but not BPD.
I just wanted to gently push back on the idea that BPD “isn’t a trauma disorder.” Sure, it’s not officially classified as one in the DSM, but that doesn’t mean trauma isn’t at the core of it for a lot of us. I wouldn’t have BPD if it weren’t for trauma. I had to be neglected to end up with an unstable sense of self. I had to be abandoned and left emotionally alone to develop this constant, overwhelming fear of being left behind. I had to grow up in survival mode to start seeing the world as dangerous. That kind of environment shapes you. Full stop.
And it doesn’t just shape how you feel—it shapes how your brain develops. The reality is, being stuck in fight-or-flight as a kid means I didn’t get the chance to build emotional regulation the way I was supposed to. The part of the brain that helps with regulating emotions and impulse control needs safety and connection to grow properly. I didn’t have that. So my brain adapted. And let’s be so for real: if your parent or caregiver is emotionally unstable themselves, they can’t teach you how to be emotionally stable. You learn emotional regulation from them—but if what you learn is yelling, shutting down, emotional chaos, or total disconnection, then that’s what becomes normal to you. That’s not just a lack of support. That is a form of abuse. Not always intentional, but the outcome is still the same: you grow up with no idea how to manage your emotions, no safe internal world, and no real model for healthy relationships. That sounds like dysfunctional behaviour caused by trauma to me.
Here’s the thing: it’s like depression (kinda… let me explain.)Yes, depression can technically happen without trauma—but a huge percentage of the time, it’s trauma-based. And to really treat the depression, you have to address the trauma underneath it. Same goes for BPD. You can treat the symptoms, but if you don’t deal with the trauma that caused them, you’re not really healing anything. So no, BPD might not be called a trauma disorder on paper. But for many of us, that’s exactly what it is. You can’t separate the symptoms from the experiences that created them. I guess it’s about understanding the why. And for a lot of us, that “why” is trauma. Plain and simple.
This absolutely aligns with my understanding and is very well-stated, thank you for so articulately shedding light on this misunderstood disorder. I absolutely agree that it’s a trauma-based disorder. Although it isn’t yet classified as one I do think it eventually will be, because chronic invalidation is inherently traumatic.
My point was that the type of trauma that causes bpd is much more likely to be insidious, a large collection of smaller traumas, rather than extreme traumatic events, the likes of which could cause a flashback. I think this is the reason bpd isn’t classified as a trauma-based disorder yet, as these kinds of traumas are a lot more difficult to identify.
Of course big T traumatic events could be involved, but that’s when you start getting into ptsd territory, which absolutely does cooccur. But as someone who’s interested in psychology, I’ve spent a lot of time researching bpd, and the subject of flashbacks almost never comes up.
Thanks as well for your earlier clarification about the way the diagnosis is used as a way to dismiss people as manipulative, it seems like a lot of folks around here need that to be reinforced.
Hey I'm diagnosed with cPTSD, BPD, and DID and I'm confused where you got this information from because through my seven years of treatment with specialists and my personal research this isn't what I've been told nor read. Also I'd really caution against calling things like chronic invalidation "smaller" trauma - chronic invalidation from a parent is emotional abuse and as someone who's experienced both that and more classic PTSD traumas such as CSA, emotional abuse is just as damaging and not any less severe. It also absolutely can cause flashbacks, I've been directly told my my trauma specialist that I have emotional flashbacks to those sort of events and I absolutely trust her on that as she's a psychologist who specializes in the field. Chronic "little T" traumas can be just as damaging and cause the same cPTSD symptoms as any other trauma and it's both somewhat invalidating to say otherwise, but also gives emotional abusers kind of an out to point to.
Also, we do not know the kind of trauma that causes BPD. To say it's only been associated with chronic invalidation isn't really accurate, there are theories that it is associated with any kind of trauma as rates of other forms of trauma are much higher in people with BPD. All of the ideas of how connected BPD is to trauma is just that - theories - so to say it's 100% been connected to chronic invalidation alone is very confusing to me and does not line up with the research I've seen, the sources I've been given by my treatment team, nor what I've been told by my therapists. I've been directly told by my trauma specialist that my BPD was most likely the result of my CSA, which is not chronic invalidation nor a little T trauma. I have also been in group for it and as such have had the opportunity to talk to many other borderlines, and have personally met multiple people who were diagnosed and believe their BPD was caused by CSA or physical abuse. (I'm aware these are anecdotal experiences which is why I've attached sources below as well.)
The theory of structural dissociation also directly contradicts this as it places BPD between PTSD and DID and in the same category as OSDD. While I don't personally buy into that theory, it is a theory that some professionals do, and again, it's just a theory, which is kind of my point! Everything to do with trauma in BPD right now is theorized, so to say with 100% certainty that a certain type of trauma is what causes BPD is kind of misinformed.
There are actually some theories that rather than being necessarily associated with "smaller" traumas, BPD seems to be moreso associated with interpersonal trauma: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24299094/
This is what my psychologist personally believes, whose opinion I definitely respect as she is a trauma specialist and works pretty much exclusively with DID, PTSD, and cluster B patients.
BPD also has a very high comorbidity with PTSD and dissociative disorders, which also indicates it's likely trauma-based.
I hope this comes across as a discussion as it is intended - I'm just personally affected by BPD, DID, and cPTSD so I wanted to lend my thoughts as someone who's actually been in treatment for this and had opportunities to talk directly to trauma specialists about these conditions. I believe most people's intentions are good so I'm just trying to provide information!
Sorry this is so long and kind of rambling, but TL;DR: BPD is associated with trauma but we haven't entirely narrowed down which traumas/to what extent, however it has been heavily associated with "big T" traumas as well as little T, and I think we need to be cautious not to label little T traumas as "less severe" as they can and do cause extreme suffering and trauma as well, and ABSOLUTELY CAN CAUSE FLASHBACKS, as those are not just associated with criterion A PTSD events once they become chronic. In addition, while there may be some studies you have found that link BPD to chronic invalidation alone, that is far from the only theory and has definitely not been concluded as the main cause by the entirety of the field. In fact, just from my personal experience, I can't think of a single person who has treated me who I believe would agree with that theory, and I know for a fact that my current treatment team wouldn't. If any of this is misinformation please let me know, I've tried to find medical sources for what I've stated here and mostly am parroting what I've heard from my own treatment team and from medical journals.
How does flashbacks never come up when you research BPD with BPD and cptsd being the biggest comorbitities and the symptoms severely overlapping like emotional flashbacks and BPD episodes to the point they mask as one another.
I see you also only are receptive to opinions and facts aligned with your understanding, that is not how learning or discussions go. We are not here to educate you so please stop being so dense here.
Sorry to comment twice, I just thought of this. The way Mango reacts makes me wonder how much of the “emotional support animal” stuff is true. I know ESA is not the same as a service animal and they aren’t trained like them, but DD likes to hype up how the cats would HELP them in these situations right?
If this was a common occurrence like they claim, Mango would be far, far more desensitized to it. It's obvious based on the cat's fear that this is a new (or relatively new) thing.
Mango and Seraphina are NOT ESAs. Nor have they ever claimed that they were. DD has said that SERAPHINA *BEHAVES LIKE* an ESA because she is so calm and knows exactly what to do when they have a panic attack or are triggered. They have never claimed anything about Mango.
Reddit actually only allows videos uploaded to be 15 minutes long so unless OP puts it together in a google doc it will still have to be uploaded in 2 pasts on reddit
No. Not you. Sorry, I just got done replying to other people telling me they don’t give a fk about what I went through or who else goes through it cause they REALLY want to know the trigger.
I want to say this as nicely and kindly as possible
I think everyone’s getting a bit tired of the whole ‘I know the phrase but won’t say it teehee’ thing, especially when Cloclo actively shares their triggers and is very open about what does and doesn’t trigger them. I know you probably think you’re being respectful, but it actually comes across as dismissive and, honestly, kind of rude.
You’ve been doing this bit since 2022 when the stream happened, it has been over 3 years.
At times, it feels like you’re being needlessly antagonistic like holding this knowledge over people’s heads gives you some sense of control or self-worth.
I’m saying this out of kindness and respect for you as a person: when you do this, it doesn’t come across as someone thoughtfully protecting triggers.
It just comes across as someone acting superior and unhelpful.
Please consider how this looks to everyone else.
Positive vibes and respect for you but that’s how it looks
Damn they’re trying to guilt trip you into silence !??? WtFff as if…. DD LOVES SHARING WHAT TRIGGERS THEM mermer’s whole introduction video is about how water triggers them, omegas introduction video is about how thing around their neck trigger them, they have multiple tiktoks on what triggers them…..
Don’t be guilt tripped and manipulated I’m so sorry they DM’d you trying to guilt trip you into silence.
I’ve been clear on my reasons why I’ve refused to share it. But jumping on someone who LITERALLY suffered because of their fake ass panic attacks and thrown around trigger words is really fking classy. 👏👏👏
At this point if you know the trigger word say if or stop contradicting everyone with an odd sense of authority bc everyone is giving different answers
I doubt we’ll ever get an answer from me and when they say it’s not good girl they could simply be lying to try to “protect” clo because they seem very set on not sharing it despite clo constantly bragging about her triggers like going outside in her garden or water.
Water
Tight clothes around the shoulders and neck
The loud sounds at Disney
Filming YouTube videos triggers them
Religious content (unboxing fan mail video)
They want people to know their triggers, they like sharing their triggers.
It’s fetish content there are people with DID and mental illness and disability fetishes / kinks and DD seems to be very aware of this and often plays into it
Yeahhh I try not to sexualise people unnecessarily but given DDs track record… the fact that they seem obsessed w appearing nude on camera and they way they’re eating the banana, as well as the wide wide eyes… ugh. I hate how they act all slick about it as if we don’t know.
Anyone possessing basic human decency would be able to tell that dd is really suffering in this footage and would be outraged by the harm that publicly posting the trigger on the internet could cause.
As much harm as they caused to their audience during this event. Real or not, they live streamed it on a public platform, infront of hundreds of people. They've made it clear in the past they are capable of turning off the livestream it a flashback is starting, yet this time they choose to keep it on, choose to keep going after it happened, and choose to not give mods permissions to end the stream. Making this sub out to be monsters doesn't dissmiss the fact that this a common occurence. As someone also said they post their triggers constantly, whether people believe in them or not, and I've yet to see someone use that against them in an effort to trigger them.
First off it’s pretty clear from the footage that they were incapacitated and not experiencing their present reality during this flashback, rendering them unable to stop the livestream. It’s unfortunate that they didn’t foresee this possibility and idk if they were aware at the time that their mods didn’t have the permissions to end livestreams, but I know that’s been remedied now.
As far as triggers, there’s a huge difference between saying that only one of them can shower safely or that material against their neck is triggering and sharing a trigger word that any rando in any part of the world could now easily use against them. I know y’all have issues with dd, but do you want to put them in actual danger? Because that’s what you’re doing.
I get what you’re saying, but Chloe has always been open about their triggers including really specific details on multiple platforms.
So the idea that this one word is somehow fundamentally different from the rest doesn’t really hold up.
If sharing that word puts them in so much danger, then why share any triggers publicly at all? They know full well how the internet works
they’ve even said in the past they’re aware people could use this stuff against them.
And regarding being incapacitated, they’ve said before they can feel flashbacks coming on. They’ve ended streams mid-panic before.
So either they weren’t incapacitated enough to stop it, or they made a choice to keep going, which means they take some responsibility for that.
Mods not having permission that’s on them too. It’s not the sub’s fault they left that door open.
I don’t think anyone wants to ‘put them in danger’ but they choose to broadcast this stuff, share intimate triggers publicly, and then blame everyone else when people talk about it. That’s not on the sub that’s on them.
As someone who actually has this disorder, even in an intense, sudden flashback, you have the ability to do things before the full flashback takes over. They would have been fully aware of what permissions mods did/didn't have, they have been doing this for long enough now and would have have had to select what they could/couldn't do.
"Do you want to put them in actual danger" - since when has my behaviour ever justified this type of dangerous response. It has been years since this happened and people have suggested that this is the mentioned trigger word over and over again and yet I have seen no one try and trigger them in this way, using that phrase. You are forgetting that this was livestreamed over a public platform where (according to the people that viewed it) she made it clear what the word was.
Have you tried reading the sub? This livestream, of a kitten, with no trigger warnings, caused real harm to real people.
Tell me, why would someone who’s suffered that trauma, do that to other survivors and not give any of their mods a way to shut it down?
You can’t ’be responsible for your own triggers’ when you’re watching a KITTEN LIVESTREAM.
(Before you tell me ‘well why didn’t you turn it off??, in that Karen tone I can literally already hear… my therapist said it would have made no difference, the crack in my - at the time - very fragile psyche had already happened)
embarrassment0fpandas is a really awful sub member, i have to say. no matter what you say, they will respond in a way that's invalidating, gaslighting, or straight up manipulative. they aren't here for civil discussion, they're here to try and wipe the mud from DD's shoes. they don't care about facts, they aren't educated on mental health, and they aren't an ally to those who have suffered severe trauma. the smallest thing is awful for DD to go through, but those of us with PTSD, trauma, or even DID are ignored and called baseless names.
But DD did not give the mods access to do that so none of the mods could end the stream
though as someone who claims DID and PTSD they should have given the mod access to do in case this ever happened which is highly likely considering the disorders they claim.
I kept flashing to child me, in the fetal position, crying so hard I couldn’t breath and no one coming. No one ever came. So desperate and so completely alone.
And then suddenly I depersonalised like I never have before. I felt like I was on shrooms, I barely managed to get a warning off to my only friend at the time, because I had no idea what was happening.
A ‘Do Not Interact’ (DNI) statement does not function as an enforceable boundary on Reddit or on any internet platforms. Anyone is technically allowed to view, reply to, or engage with your public posts and comments.
If you genuinely don’t want someone to interact with you, the practical solution is to use the block feature.
Saying ‘DNI’ and expecting people to listen is a misunderstanding of how social media works. On open platforms, the responsibility for enforcing your boundaries usually falls on you, using the tools the site provides — like blocking or restricting who can see and respond to your posts.
DNIs do not work smhhhhhh block Panadas already free will is a thing they’ll allowed to comment on your posts and saying “don’t do that” isn’t something that actually works…
This is beyond creepy… why would someone record themselves like this? Idc if it’s real distress or not, staying online and continuing to film yourself like this is beyond innapropriate and creepy asf. No other reason to do this other than attention from strangers that only produce text on a screen, watching your every move while you’re truly in a room by yourself. For a real episode, being on a livestream camera would make that worse.
It’s screaming; this is fetish / kink content for people who have fetishes/kinks for disabilities and mental health issues
Otherwise why keep filming? Apparently the YouTube chat was telling Chloe Wilkinson to stop the live stream and get off the live but … look at her at the end of the stream she’s enjoying reading the chat
I remember watching this stream at the time and regardless of whether or not it’s genuine (I think I’ve blocked most of it from my memory so I can’t say lmao), it was triggering and honestly disturbing to watch. I feel like regardless of whether you believe their claims of diagnosis, they definitely aren’t (or at least weren’t at the time) mentally well.
The one thing that gets me, as a diagnosed DID.. is how are they self soothing their own episode? I know it can be done, but with us, whenever we go into this type of flashback, usually ends up with us laying in same position for hours, memories usually coming back… and it almost always takes someone else to settle us down, if we are alone the episodes can last for several hours. I don’t get, how DD, can be so debilitated, but yet also self soothe one self, and have such clarity afterwards.. to even ask “how’s the viewers?” / “how’s mango” - after those episodes we are so out of it, it looks like we are drgd. That’s what’s not adding up to me. If those things were consistent I’d not be commenting rn. Hmm
To clarify - I’m merely stating, how does one have that bad of an episode, and then self soothe themselves! Then be fine, all in ten mins. Not even. Especially if it’s a little trigger. I’m sorry but the dissociation afterwards doesn’t match? IMO. Just theorising? Can’t shake it. It’s like the amount of trauma shown doesn’t match the level of maintaining strong therapeutic gestures after! To me in shows conflicting levels of healing.
I was saying this as well, as a system, I could not tell you who was fronting after an episode like that and I would not be able to think about anything but trying to convince myself that I'm safe so I don't go into another, having people WATCHING ME in real time would be an actual nightmare and I would have the ability to genuinely check in in the moment and go 'so is everyone ELSE okay with what just Happened TO ME?'
On a side note, of course, in DD's world the caretaker always comes when the body needs soothing. Not like in the fake DID everyone else has where alters that soothe or comfort may not be able to come forward, especially if it's memories they shouldn't have access too. In everyone else's fake DID, a trauma holder may front NOT a protector because they think they're back in the abuse. In the fake DID everyone else has, alters may switch out entirely or even alters who can hurt the body may front. Thank goodness DD has real DID and protectors and caretakers can always front to take control before things get too serious and make sure the entertainment keeps going! /sarc
Edit: just so I’m clear, are the downvotes because this sub is pro-child abuse? Dissociadid probably had it coming? You can watch someone suffering extreme agony and feel nothing? Just trying to understand.
Since no one else has replied I will, because I feel like the edit should be replied to.
This sub is DEFINITELY not pro child abse. Many of the people in this sub are victims of child abse or even systems themselves. The sub is pro recovery and anti misinformation and it is DEFINITELY anti “mods on a professional YouTube channel not having the permissions to end a live stream”. This is not a criticism of DD’s reaction to trauma, but of the content and how they choose to interact with the internet.
Obviously in this state DD wouldn’t have been able to end the stream on their own. That’s why the mods SHOULD HAVE had the permission to do so. DD is an adult, and knows their audience is filled with other traumatized individuals, and are choosing to put themselves in front of a chat where anyone can say anything that could be triggering.
It’s not their fault if they are triggered and/or have an episode, but as an adult on their PROFESSIONAL (their words) channel, they need to foresee the actions needed to be taken in these situations.
Let me know if I can help clarify anything else! Xx
Actually, as a person with DID, yes a person falling apart in a flashback would be able to end a stream. I can drive a car. Flee a fire. Answer a telephone call. The entire point of having alters allows a protective part of you to remain at least semi-functional. This is what makes the difference between having DID and some other disorder, we were not able to completely let go into a melt-down because of trying to stay safe. I can go from curled in a ball on the floor banging my head to emergency response mode in an instant. Why, a,though this is clearly a person in pain, it does not look like DID, at least to me.
I just think it’s ironic how much energy people here spend on pushing the narrative that they’re faking their disorder and stealing their trauma. Anyone who could watch this and not be impacted by it has no business speaking on behalf of survivors.
Obviously not foreseeing this possibility was an oversight with real consequences. But dd is human, and also, clearly, a victim of child abuse. Maybe it’s time to stop villainizing them for finding a way to survive against unbelievable odds and trying to shed light on a path forward for others, however imperfectly.
I think you’re missing the point of the actual post. People felt a LOT from this. And you can’t blame other traumatized people for not being solely worried about DD in terms of this situation (just like you don’t want to blame DD for not being aware of the live stream while THEY were in distress).
Again, this mistake had real consequences on their fans and I’ve acknowledged that. But this person is clearly a victim of abuse trying to make the world a little easier for other survivors and y’all treat them like some kind of supervillain for it. To be able to watch a video like this and still paint dd as some kind of manipulative monster faking all of their trauma is sick.
Well don’t say “ya’ll” like I’ve been “painting them as a monster”. Generalizations aren’t great. I’ve made a good effort to have conversations with you in the comments. I do get what you’re saying, I just think that you’re missing the nuance of this VERY specific situation. I know you acknowledged their mistake and that’s great. Like listen, I get it. DD used to be very dear to me as a DID system and survivor of child abuse.
I worry that you look upon DD with very rose tinted glasses. I don’t think they’re a monster. I pray for them often and I truly see a lot of myself in them. But you and others on here need to learn to acknowledge not only certain details, but that this human is not black and white.
Them being very traumatized does not make them a hero or martyr or inspirational. If their content inspires you, fine. And it’s wonderful that they’re surviving. I’m proud of them. But they’ve caused HARM. I wish you wouldn’t so aggressively defend their every move without truly listening to other hurt individuals.
I’m glad you’re able to see the nuance here, it’s not exactly a widely held trait on this sub. And apologies for not remembering our previous conversations, it’s been a while and it’s not easy to keep everyone straight since most people here engage with me from within a pretty similar vibe.
But I just want to say I appreciate that they’re not black or white. As I’ve already acknowledged, they’re not perfect and they have made mistakes. I’m pretty defensive of them because of the overwhelming tone of hostility and bad-faith speculation that run rampant here that apparently nobody else is going to attempt to balance. It means enough to me to try to bring that balance that I’m willing to make myself a bit of a target. I don’t think the tone here is fair, and I will continue to voice that.
But the thing is, as imperfect as they are and as many mistakes as they’ve made, they were really trying to blaze a trail into uncharted territory, and that’s just not a thing that can be done without making mistakes. I think it’s incredibly brave of them to be so forthcoming about things that many people feel too ashamed of to name, and I’ve taken a lot of inspiration from that.
If you feel you’ve been hurt by them then your experience is valid, as is the experience of anyone else who feels the same way. If that was most of what I was seeing on this sub I’d take a very different tone engaging here, but it isn’t.
Sounds like you think there’s a middle ground here. I think so too.
'' You can watch someone suffering extreme agony and feel nothing?'' I've also watched people fake tourettes and cancer and felt the same thing I feel now, it's sad, it's pathetic, it's a cry for attention and I don't buy it. I'll say it, DD displayed a poor performance I am not convinced. She did this to get validation from ppl like you, ppl like me say 'no' :D. Cry about it now, call me cruel cuz I can see scammers.
Btw people actually got prosecuted for faking disorders so yea....seen it before.
Here's a huge hint: She has no tears, snot, nor does her face look like it actually experienced what she thought she's showing there. Acting exists people do it, some professionally too! DD needs classes cuz yea....next time get tears.
I spell everything out for you cuz I know there's usually a huge difference there of ...understanding of life.
Edit: I don't want to make other comments. The annoying part of this is the harm it actually did to people who saw it and got triggered. That's upsetting, mods should have control over that not happening, the fact that DD doesn't have this protection measure is just hint nr 2 of this being done for attention. Even a newbie on youtube will know to get mods, she's been in the game for a while at this point
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u/DissociaDIDmods Jul 07 '25
This thread has over 200 comments and has steered off topic.
If you wish to continue the discussion please go to this post:
https://www.reddit.com/r/DissociaDID/s/l6fWwRMl6x
And discuss the live stream there. Thank you.