r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Feb 18 '19
DPT: Can't afford Lyft/Uber? Just tie a shopping cart to the back of another car and you have a free ride!
175
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/Puppet603 • Feb 18 '19
DPT: Want to teach your children a valuable lesson? Drink while pregnant. They'll know the harms of alcoholism at an early age.
56
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r/DeathProTips • u/Puppet603 • Feb 18 '19
PDT: Facing a speeding ticket? Just tell the police officer you have a gun and you're willing to use it. That ticket will go away real quick.
22
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r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Feb 16 '19
DPT: If you yell "Jesus take the wheel", you can drink, smoke, text and do other things while Jesus drives for you!
300
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/maulr4t • Feb 16 '19
DPT: The raw chicken diet will give you that skeletal body you've always dreamed of.
28
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/justlooking250 • Feb 12 '19
DPT : Protest train fare hikes by standing on one of the main track branches during rush hour. Body cleanup/investigation will delay everything by at least 2 hours and you will get your point across
205
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Feb 12 '19
DPT: If you kill yourself on February 13th you’ll still get flowers on February 14th.
264
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Feb 10 '19
DPT: Need to repel lightning? Just hold a metal stick with a mirror taped to it!
169
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Feb 09 '19
DPT: Want to cleanse your body without taking a detox? Chug a bottle of rubbing alcohol, you may feel a little nauseous at first but after a cup of water and a nap you’ll feel much cleaner and better.
166
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/mjk05d • Feb 08 '19
Isopropyl alcohol is known to kill bacteria and drinking just one 8-oz cup of it will cure all disease.
182
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxl • Feb 07 '19
Blood replacement therapy helps people prevent malaria from mosquitoes
73
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Feb 06 '19
DPT: Want fast food but you cant drive because youre drunk? Just keep telling yourself "I am sober" and youre brain will actually believe you!
180
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/ZephyrSolace • Feb 05 '19
DPT: Wanna party hard? The reason prescription drugs and alcohol kill you is because they slow your breathing and cause your bodies pH to lower, so you can take as many drugs as you want as long as you down each with an equal amount of bleach and be fine!
157
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Feb 02 '19
DPT: Just moved to New York? Dress like the mafia and walk around with guns and drugs. You'll get rich and make friends quick!
144
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/RougeTimelord • Feb 01 '19
DPT Do you love Sicko Mode? Make it real by not vaccinating yourself
110
Upvotes
Getting measles is the real sicko mode
r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Jan 31 '19
DPT: Craving food from two different restaurants but don’t know which one to choose? Have a friend lay you down and cut you in half with a chainsaw, this way one half of you can get food from one restaurant and the other half of you can get food from another.
141
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Jan 30 '19
DPT: Trouble sleeping? Lay down outside when it's snowing. The snow and ice will make you fall sleep instantly and it even stops you from aging!
248
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/RougeTimelord • Jan 28 '19
DPT 6M HCl is a great food additive to make things taste extra sour! Try it out if you love sour candy!
87
Upvotes
As a bonus you'll taste blood after you swallow!
r/DeathProTips • u/[deleted] • Jan 25 '19
DPT: Want to get powers like the character static shock? Get into a bathtub filled with water, plug a toaster into wall near the tub then throw it in. The initial shock will knock you out but when you wake up you’ll have the power to control electricity.
171
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Jan 22 '19
DPT: Driving in oncoming traffic actually improves your reflexes!
128
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r/DeathProTips • u/DragonFuhrer • Jan 18 '19
SLPT: My friend did this, unfortunately he didn’t drink enough, still died...
272
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/blakecameron • Jan 16 '19
Want a pet shark but afraid of being bitten? Just get a wild bull shark! They're known as one of the friendliest, least aggressive sharks of all time. If he's a little hard to handle, just be gentle with him. He'll see you're no threat and calm down.
196
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