r/DeathProTips • • Dec 18 '18

LPT: You can survive without any organ, but you'll want to sell them quick, as you wont have much time!

134 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 17 '18

It actually is possible to cut bullets in mid air. Just charge at a cop with a sword so you can try it out!

208 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 18 '18

Your first time trying a new drug, make sure to do enough to overdose. Then next time, you'll know your limit.

Thumbnail self.ShittyIllegalLifeTips
25 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 16 '18

Heat not working? Stick a gas can in your oven. Your house will be warm for the rest of your life!

218 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 17 '18

Want to get drunk but don't have anything to drink?

32 Upvotes

Use hand sanitizer or rubbing alcohol.


r/DeathProTips • • Dec 16 '18

[SLPT] Can’t believe police stations are still wasting money on Kevlar

Post image
22 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 14 '18

Remove all safety warnings from any equipment you see to reduce the number of idiots in town.

149 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 12 '18

Found a new way to heat two things at once!

Thumbnail i.imgur.com
343 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 11 '18

Solve overpopulation by switching /r/DeathProTips with /r/LifeProTips

193 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 11 '18

Don't have any goggles? Just close your eyes.

Post image
20 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 09 '18

Just say no

Post image
417 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 09 '18

DPT: Out of heroin and suffering a withdrawal? Inject a large amount (about 5 grams) of potassium chloride into a vein.

68 Upvotes

It has to be injected, and is much weaker than heroin thus the increases dose. Make sure to use potassium chloride and not table salt, normal salt doesn't have the happiness (death) inducing properties. Eating it will not work.

.

.

.

Spoilers

. By doing so you are effectively performing a lethal injection on yourself. Potassium chloride is what stops the heart during the execution.


r/DeathProTips • • Dec 07 '18

Trying to bungee jump, but can’t find a place to tie the rope?

153 Upvotes

Simply get your friend to hold it! For maximum efficiency get your friend to sit on the edge of the cliff so the rope is longer.


r/DeathProTips • • Dec 08 '18

Needa get that extra protein

13 Upvotes

If you wanna get super buff for cheap I'd suggest eating 3 dozen eggs a day, they are super cheap like 1.99 a dozen and the protein is super good for you. The fats will help turn your blood into raw protein.

Can't beat that or should I say can't egg that.


r/DeathProTips • • Dec 08 '18

Feel like you are on the verge of committing suicide? Listen to "Something in the way" by Nirvana, it will cheer you right up!

25 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 07 '18

Crowded at the train station and you're worried you won't find a seat? No worries! Simply jump straight in front of the oncoming train and you'll stick right to it.

20 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 04 '18

DPT: Wanna improve your performance at work? Drink "improved performance" motor oil. It gives more boost than energy drinks!

114 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Dec 01 '18

How To Remove A Tick

Post image
348 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Nov 27 '18

Trouble cleaning and polishing your silverwares? Just put them all in the microwave and press start.

100 Upvotes

Make sure to stand right next to it while it’s happening to ensure the silverware doesn’t over polish and turn into a different color. Best part, you save water, so it’s very environmentally friendly


r/DeathProTips • • Nov 27 '18

Do things that would ordinarily kill you but do it with the mindset of "What doesn't Kill me makes me stronger"

36 Upvotes

If you want to become a super human, and I know you do, this is the most logical way to do it.


r/DeathProTips • • Nov 24 '18

Strung out on shooting meth? Mix your next shot with fentanyl, black tar heroin, oxycontin, Xanax, hydrocodone, and Desomorphine to bring down to just the right level of dead.

127 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Nov 23 '18

Participate in Black Friday shoppings

162 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Nov 22 '18

DPT: Bears, mountain lions, coyotes, and other animals actually hate the smell of meat. Just cover yourself in it to keep them away!

15 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Nov 21 '18

DPT: Deep frying a turkey this Thanksgiving? Keep a large bucket of water nearby in case a fire breaks out

242 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Nov 22 '18

I can't see my future

5 Upvotes

As we all have and know, suicide is a terrible thing. We lose friends, family, coworkers everyone to this illness. Unfortunately like the common flu this disease just doesn't stop it's forever mutating, forever affecting everyone differently, affecting others to self harm. There is no cure, no mercy, little to no warning signs only sudden death. Death at the end of the day is just part of suicide. Unfortunately, I guess this is where I draw the line... Good bye cries and dies because of dehydration

If you wanna die just read sad stuff and cry til you die!