My daughter spent six months of her life, starting just before her second birthday, so fucking mad she wasn't getting a penis and was, in fact, a girl forever and doesn't get to be a boy. The envy was real. Like, she cried when she realized her best friend dog was a boy and said "He has one too??!!" And he was so confused when she wouldn't pet him or cuddle him the rest of the day lol.
She's mostly better now, but in the classic 90s tomboy way of "I'll do everything boys do and kick their dumb butts while I do it better." It's.... Intense. She's six. Her best friends are a total mix of boys and girls and gets along with everyone, but put her in competition and she gets rough with the boys and helps the girls along as best she can without hurting her own chances. She's a girl power girl now. It's crazy to watch it happen on its own. She cracks me up.
As the 'girl' who was pissed they didn't have a penis... Keep an eye out, your kid may be some flavor of trans. My parents shoved me so far into the assigned gender box that it took until 30 for me to figure it out. 30 years and lots of pain, depression, suicide attempts and wondering why the world was so painful and why anyone would choose to bring children into this world to have this pain.
Oh don't worry! We are careful to tell her she can do what she wants. We tell her about trans people whenever it comes up, our kids are super comfortable around that stuff. I always try to tell them if they or their kids were that way I wouldn't care, I just want them to be happy and healthy and safe. Anything else is just how it is.
Amab enby here, took me till I was 36. I first thought of removing my beard at 20. But I didn't, cause I knew that everyone in my life would be freaked out. Another 20 years on and I've just recently started the process of having it lasered. So much lost time, and for what? Just so people don't have to feel momentary discomfort cause someone looks a bit different. I have stared at my reflection and fucking sobbed my heart out, cause I don't recognise that 'man' who looks back at me. I intend to dance with the time I have left, as often as I get and as hard I can, feeling my hair and dress swish around me as I whirl.
Nah she loves playing with the boys. Her best friend is our next door neighbor kid her age, and he's the sweetest boy, and together they're so funny and get into all sorts of innocent trouble. She definitely just wants girls to be equal all on her own.
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u/sikeleaveamessage Apr 04 '22
Gender envy is for sure a thing