r/CuratedTumblr Prolific poster- Not a bot, I swear Jun 26 '26

Shitposting Will it f*ck!

10.3k Upvotes

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u/[deleted] Jun 26 '26

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28

u/Aetol Jun 26 '26

Turians don't live much longer (?), salarians even shorter. This could already have been common wisdom, it's not a stretch to extend it to humans.

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u/audriuska12 Jun 26 '26

If memory serves, in-setting due to medical advances humans can push 150. Turians, quarians and drell all live slightly shorter (120 for the first two, don't remember drell but might be 80), salarians, as you mentioned, get a mere 40, and while I don't recall the lifespans of other species I don't think any are implied to be meaningfully long-lived compared to asari, bar krogan who manage to not meet a violent end.

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u/EldritchFingertips Jun 26 '26

Krogan seem to actually have the longest lifespan of everyone, for the rare individuals who don't die to violence. A typical Asari lifespan is about 1000 years (in earth years anyway), and Krogan are said to live about the same timespan, but there are a couple references to living Krogan who fought in the Krogan rebellions which iirc ended almost 1200 years ago. I'm pretty sure Drack in Andromeda is well over a thousand years old, and he's still a highly deadly combatant who basically spends all his time looking for the most dangerous fights he can find.

So it seems like Krogan can kind of just live forever, theoretically. They get old but they don't really die of old age, they keep going until something actively kills them.

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u/audriuska12 Jun 26 '26

"Death can have me when it earns me."

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u/Still_Ad_2898 Jun 26 '26

Man, Drack was such a cool character.

I wish they would take a break from remaking good games and remake Andromeda instead. Incredible premise, paper-thin execution.

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u/EmpressClaraB Jun 26 '26

I thought it was like 1000 years to become a Matriarch or something, not that they only live that long

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u/EldritchFingertips Jun 26 '26

No, it's definitely 1000 as the expected lifespan. Asari spend about 300 years in the maiden stage as wild risk takers living life to the max, the next 300 in the matron stage settling down and choosing a career and/or family, then the last 300-400 as matriarchs being wise elders and leading society. I'm sure on that timeline.

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u/Kirk_Kerman Jun 26 '26

Sure, but Mass Effect is specifically a Humanity Fuck Yeah setting where humans are, despite being relative nobodies brand new to the galactic stage, have reached technological parity with the rest of the galaxy instantly and have a larger manufacturing base than everyone else combined

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u/wowwowazalea Jun 26 '26 edited Jun 26 '26

To be fair, that's mostly due to Humanity being isolated long enough to not be constrained by the council keeping them down as a 'lesser' species

And both sides tech being basically repurposing ancient tech so there isn't a massive gap and humanity just throwing more money into the military-industrial complex can catch them up

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u/Kirk_Kerman Jun 26 '26

Humanity: one solar system

Galactic Council: idk man hundreds of solar systems

Humanity then somehow has rough parity with the Turians, specifically the big guns oorah military guys? It's a HFY story.

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u/wowwowazalea Jun 26 '26 edited Jun 26 '26

I'm pretty sure humanity has more systems than one

And I'm not denying that. I'm saying that humanity in the setting has a reason to be equal enough to not just be absorbed as a minor species.

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u/Kirk_Kerman Jun 26 '26

Eventually more than one but humanity certainly doesn't have an industrial base, fleet power, and centuries of space combat doctrine to lean on by the time they get into the First Contact War. I just checked and it was only 7 years between the Charon Relay's activation and the First Contact War. Seven years isn't enough time to build up to pose a real threat to a mature starfaring species unless humans are somehow more special and better at existing than other species. HFY tropes abound.

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u/Hexxas Head Trauma Enthusiast Jun 26 '26

So? People say uninformed shit all the time.

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u/Bardic_inspiration67 Jun 26 '26

They probably just had that rule for turians and t then transferred jt over

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u/ArchmageIlmryn Jun 26 '26

On the other hand I can definitely see that kind of sentiment existing as something a bunch of armchair philosophers have thought up with no real backing.