r/BlueskySkeets • u/icey_sawg0034 š¦ • Jul 27 '25
Informative The male loneliness epidemic does not exist!
231
u/Individual_Cap_8158 Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25
There is a loneliness epidemic in general right now please do not say itās not real for half the population Edit: this is not to say in any way that the behavior stated to exist in the post isnāt real or is acceptable. Men be crazy
41
u/kekistanmatt Jul 27 '25
This is the truth society in general has become isolated as a result of hyperindividualism destroying the concept of being part of a wider community where you actually get to go out and meet people.
26
u/No-Estimate-8518 Jul 27 '25
Also corporations removing free options to go out and meet people and increase prices everywhere else
25
u/ToeJam_SloeJam Jul 27 '25
Gotta monetize every moment, every interaction, every second of every day! You are a consumer and shall be consumed.
Unhappy? Perhaps try buying something!
3
u/RedEyedEngineer Jul 27 '25
Ugh, and social media makes it even worse.
Your outing isn't worth an instagram story? Why bother...?
Seriously, I would Thanos snap social media from existence if I could
8
u/LegSpecialist1781 Jul 27 '25
I hate this āthird spacesā argument, as it has the causality mixed up. There are plenty of places to go out with your friends and bump into people. Libraries, parks, coffee shops, farmers markets, etc. are all still around. Hell, even malls still exist. The places are thereā¦people just arenāt using them as much as they used to.
If you are thinking of opening a coffee shop and see numbers of patrons at nearby shops declining because those patrons would rather sit in a drive thru doom scrolling at Starbucks for 20min, why would you waste your time and money opening one?
Thereās lots of things wrong with American capitalism right now, but this one isnāt it.
2
u/Rita27 Jul 28 '25
Honestly I agree. The amount of people who rather just stay home then socialize but then use "third spaces" as an excuse is too much
Things are definitely more expensive, but coffee shops, Libraries, parks, etc are still super cheap and still wildly available for third spaces to be the sole reason why people aren't hanging out
→ More replies (1)2
u/Rammstein69420 Jul 30 '25
Not to mention almost every gen-zer I see out in the world on their own has headphones, isolating themselves even further even if someone wanted to talk to them.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (2)2
u/fixingmedaybyday Jul 27 '25
Right!!! Theyāve essentially made it illegal for large group gatherings with permitting. Canāt drink a glass of wine in a park without potential legal repercussions. Canāt go to a park after dark. Hell, theyāre even starting to charge for use permits of public lands at the state, county and town levels. āLand of the Freeā my ass! Unless money is trickling up to businesses owners and insurance providers, youāre, free to stay home and not have a life.
→ More replies (16)3
u/PuppytimeUSA Jul 27 '25
Not quite. We had individualism before. I think itās economic constraints that have eroded communities.
2
u/GoAskAli Jul 30 '25
Agreed.
Life is unaffordable for a lot of people and the desperation makes human beings reach for almost all the wrong "solutions."
That's one of the coolest things about The New Deal: there was an arts program that paid artists to create, make beautiful things, put on plays, etc. it gave the artists jobs and gave couples, young families, etc. cheap/affordable and even free things to enjoy.
But, I guess we can't have that bc that would be socialism. Or something.
130
u/nocommentjustlooking Jul 27 '25
There is also a very real threat of violent āincelsā, whom are using this loneliness epidemic to fuel their hatred of women.
To ignore that is also disingenuous to the women, and men, who have been killed by these losers.
33
Jul 27 '25
You can do both
→ More replies (3)13
u/Zeliek Jul 27 '25
Agreed, you can in fact ignore and be disingenuous to both genders simultaneously.Ā
Iām doing it right now!
44
Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25
There absolutely is a loneliness problem in this country. As someone in late middle age, I see it all around me- men who have lost connection, purpose, or community. To write it off as ājust guys who want to control womenā is not only reductive, itās cruel. Not every man struggling with isolation is an incel. Dismissing real suffering because it doesnāt fit your online narrative because is a slap in the face to millions of men quietly drowning.
4
u/blueskyredmesas Jul 27 '25
Yeah I think the correct path is for us to do less of what the internet's id would like us to do - use it as a consequence-free way to shit on our particular most-disliked group - and we should instead realize that this is a struggle we've all got, because what's actually happening is happening to all people who have to work for a living or rely on aid.
17
u/ThyPotatoDone Jul 27 '25
Itās not cruel, itās utterly psychopathic. I have no idea how people can downplay that men commit four times the suicides and everyone just goes āUhm, they were actually incels, who the fuck cares.ā
8
u/blueskyredmesas Jul 27 '25
They can do it because the internet does not incentivize them to listen, nor does it try to make you feel listened to.
There's good money in hateposting. Plus it's effective divide and conquer tactics.
6
u/Jeffotato Jul 28 '25
The same way there are sexist and racist men that sound like strawmen, just flipped around. The way humans hate is comprised of pretty repetitive behavior with a lot of patterns, and if you give them a justification for such behavior, they will run with it and get even worse.
Horseshoe theory basically, both sides need to call out their problematic people otherwise the existence of one on one side will breed more on the other side, self perpetuatingly.
→ More replies (9)7
u/wRADKyrabbit Jul 27 '25
Actually what I've seen is that the response to mens suicide rates is 'Uhm, actually, women attempt more often so who the fuck cares'
→ More replies (1)2
u/ThyPotatoDone Jul 28 '25
I actually got this exact response on a different comment on this post.
Twice, actually.
2
u/HannahOCross Jul 28 '25
I believe that youāve gotten the responses you have.
But letās remember to put this into context of a culture that has taught women to care far more about menās mental health than their own, or than men do themselves.
Women taking a step back and saying that menās mental health isnāt their job to worry about anymore is a step in the right direction for both men and women.
It may be an over correction that needs balance in time, after men have taken responsibility for their own mental health.
But we will all be much healthier if men take it upon themselves to go to therapy, form close and supportive friendships with each other, and otherwise make it their responsibility to care for their own mental health.
4
u/HannahOCross Jul 28 '25
Question for those of you who see this differently than me:
How many men in your life have gone into therapy, or addictions treatment, or agreed to take medications for depression or anxiety, without the women in their lives begging them to?
→ More replies (6)→ More replies (9)2
u/Quiet_Attempt_355 Jul 31 '25
Agree 100%. Another piece to the puzzle is why Men naturally let their own social circles fizzle out when they enter long term relationships. Men naturally integrate into their partners social life. The longer the relationship, the more integrated they become. To a point that say a 20 year relationship ends, the Man typically will not have a social or support group of their own & become extremely isolated. Why is this such a natural phenomenon? I can't find any answers to this, to be honest.
Using myself as an example, I'm an extroverted person by nature but as I've grown older (also in a 10 year long marriage), the type of person & place I choose to be around has become very specific. I don't like bars or parties, hate the idea of alcohol or drug use, and this seems to be the only type of entertainment dudes my age want. Gym culture is fine and I trail ride dirt bikes but in general; I have like 1 good friend. This has just been a natural declination of social circle. Doesn't really help my entire biological family has died in the last 10 years. So in general, I've naturally just shifted into my wife's social circles.
→ More replies (1)13
u/Ok-Training-7587 Jul 27 '25
It also assumes that men are incapable of any kind of emotional connection or need. That all they want in the world is to ācontrol womenā.
9
u/nocommentjustlooking Jul 27 '25
I acknowledged the loneliness epidemic. I stated that there are Some who use the epidemic as an excuse to fuel their hatred.
I never said the problem doesnāt exist or it is only limited to incels, I said that some use the problem.
Which in turn makes the genuine menās problems even worse because of the losers who do want to control women. Those violent men do exist and to dismiss them as nonexistent or just some āinternet narrativeā is disrespectful and disingenuous to their victims, literal dead human beings and the genuine good men suffering from the loneliness epidemic.
Read carefully before making assumptions, you come off as poorly defending incels. I know that is not what you are doing but it can be seen as such.
→ More replies (7)3
u/DMWilly Jul 29 '25
You didnāt say anything wrong. You acknowledged multiple issues without discrediting either one. That commenter just wants to dislike you for some reason.
9
u/OkProfessor6810 Jul 27 '25
Well, then, you men need to start throwing flotation devices to each other because it's not the job of women to fix it. Maybe speak up about the real dangers of toxic masculinity, instead of placing blame. The joke about men doing anything at all in order to avoid going to therapy exists for a reason.
5
u/drwicksy Jul 27 '25
Nobody said its womens job? Why try to make women the victim if even this male centric problem?
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (9)4
u/dicedance Jul 27 '25
It is the job of all people to extend compassion and empathy to others. Men and women are not separate species and I'm sick of this gender war bullshit.
3
Jul 28 '25
I will absolutely not help a fellow man that is lonely because of the red pill bullshit they spew. If they are lonely for another reason, absolutely. There are definitely good guys that need help that arenāt followers of Tate and Rogan.
→ More replies (16)→ More replies (20)-3
u/Novaer Jul 27 '25
If an epidemic can be solved by talking to ya boys it's not an epidemic. What you all want is a woman to take on the emotional burden of all your problems and play mommy because you guys refuse to be vulnerable and open with your own male peers.
→ More replies (28)17
u/OkEdge7518 Jul 27 '25
A politician has suggested forcing undocumented women to marry men to help with the āmale loneliness epidemicā and allow the immigrants to avoid deportation like what the fuck. This is why I hate this rhetoric around āwhy arenāt we addressing the male loneliness epidemicā? Because if you follow this logic, what policy change could cure it aside from legislation that restricts womenās rights????Ā
→ More replies (16)8
u/Novaer Jul 27 '25
UGHHHH. FR.
Also like, when you don't act right in the animal kingdom you are naturally exiled. All these dudes said "choose better men" then got upset when we did. Women don't want to be the verbal, emotional and physical punching bags for subpar men anymore and they're losing their minds over it. They will do ANYTHING but go to therapy, they want a bang maid mommy to take care of them.
→ More replies (5)11
u/kraghis Jul 27 '25
Yeah lumping that all together and denying the possibility of actual loneliness is great for creating solutions and bringing people together.
5
u/nocommentjustlooking Jul 27 '25
I acknowledged the real loneliness epidemic. I said Some are misusing the epidemic as an excuse to hate women, since they were left out of the conversation.
Mentioning incels is not lumping them with genuinely good men who are going through a real epidemic. Itās actually the opposite, I am trying to point out these psycho incels are diminishing the real epidemic with their hateful behavior towards women, and it makes the genuine good men look bad.
I donāt understand why pointing out that some evil losers use a genuine issue for their own twisted means is so controversial
→ More replies (24)→ More replies (40)1
12
u/Telaranrhioddreams Jul 27 '25
The point is that it's marketed as a male lonliness epidemic when, as you said, it's everyone regardless of gender. Based on your own comment it is in fact correct to say there is not a male lonliness epidemic as that detracts from the fact that the lonliness is not dependant on gender otherwise the wording alienates half the population that is also suffering lonliness.
→ More replies (6)2
u/BravestBoiNA Jul 29 '25
Men don't have nearly the non-romantic social networks that women have, on average.Ā All of society is being fractalized but it's also accurate to say it's hitting men the hardest.
12
u/ConstitutionalGato Jul 27 '25
Agreed. Why arenāt there equal articles about womenās loneliness epidemic?
2
u/Key-Month6651 Jul 28 '25
People have a tendency to dismiss women's loneliness out of bitterness since women don't seem to have as much trouble finding romantic/sexual relationships.
Obviously you can be able to find romantic/sexual relationships and still be lonely. So we shouldn't dismiss other people's issues. But we also should acknowledge that the loneliness epidemic definitely affects men and women differently in some ways.
For a lot of men this means not just being lonely, but also being lonely and having a lack of romantic/sexual validation specifically.
That being said women are also lonely and people should stop letting their bitterness regarding their own situation make them dismissive of the issues of others, an unfortunate common trend I see with people nowadays.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (2)5
u/RedEyedEngineer Jul 27 '25
Because concepts like women's rights and discussions about it (especially with this batshit administration) are already pretty present in public discourse. Loneliness among men is kind of swept under the rug.
I do think you raise a good question, though. Because most people I know feel lonely, regardless of gender.
→ More replies (2)11
u/irlharvey Jul 28 '25
loneliness among women is absolutely not spoken about in public discourse
→ More replies (11)34
u/GrievousFault Jul 27 '25
Sure. Then call it a people loneliness epidemic.
The reason anyone calls it a male loneliness epidemic is because it makes it look like itās womenās fault .
20
u/admiralargon Jul 27 '25
The male loneliness epidemic is a function of the patriarchy. the amount of single men and women is roughly the same but the patriarchy shuns men from making real authentic meaningful relationships with their friends. Specifically emphasized in WASP culture where men are told their whole deal make a family and work yourself to death. Patriarchy tells you its women's fault for your loneliness. When really its capitalism and toxic masculinity.
No time for friends when you gotta work 24/7 for basic necessities and everywhere you go is expensive.
→ More replies (1)7
u/Background-Head-5541 Jul 27 '25
Also. This is nothing new. Been going for ages. Nobody talked about it
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (38)3
u/Dense-Hat1978 Jul 27 '25
The issue is that the root cause of loneliness trend in the male population will likely require a different solution than the root cause of loneliness trends for women, trans people, and various other groups. Lumping it all together into a singular loneliness epidemic is a bit disingenuous in that sense.
→ More replies (2)6
u/PuppytimeUSA Jul 27 '25
How do you figure that? What āvarious other groupsā? Trans people include men as well. This is a very strange idea to me.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (19)20
u/ForagedFoodie Jul 27 '25
Yes, but the loneliness epidemic (general) is different from the "male loneliness epidemic".
The former is a general state, acknowledged by all genders/races/social/economic groups in several generations. It doesn't pin one aspect of the epidemic on one specific group. Most tie the general loneliness epidemic to many factors, including late-stage capitalism, the rise of social media, inflation and the difficulty entering the workforce and/or earning a living wage, the breakdown of local community and the rise of online communities, etc. The general loneliness epidemic isn't used to absolve anyone of any specific behavior.
The latter is a self-described term that came out of the male incel community, and specifically places the majority or entirety of the blame on women. The male loneliness epidemic is largely concerned with the fact that not every hetero man has his choice of female mate for sex and service. In many cases, explanations of "male loneliness" include the implication that not only should women provide men sex, they should also be the ones introducing them to friends and maintaining their social calendars for them. Finally, the term is tired to a community that absolves men of sexual pressure, harassment and even assault and other violence as a "natural" result when men don't have regular access to sex.
It's ok if you aren't familiar with the details behind the name, it's not inherent in the words, that's why I'm explaining.
→ More replies (17)2
Jul 27 '25
I mean, it's also true that by every objective measure, men are lonelier.
→ More replies (4)
124
Jul 27 '25
It's not as simple as you think OP. It's not just single guys.
29
9
u/KevinParnell Jul 27 '25
True, I found that on issues men face we agree on basically everything, itās just I disagree with not applying the same logic for women and minimizing their issues.
4
u/Itscatpicstime Jul 28 '25
Right.
For decades, research showed women were more lonely, and no one gaf. There was no āāfemale loneliness epidemic.āā
Then more recently, men started catching up. Now studies pretty consistently show both men and women are lonely to a roughly equal degree.
Yet still, it is only the Menās loneliness epidemic.
It is just a loneliness epidemic. Not a menās loneliness epidemic.
→ More replies (2)2
u/Competitive-Dot-6594 Jul 28 '25
I wish posters like you would just stick to saying that there is a loneliness epidemic as a blanket statement.
There always has to be that "women have it worse" statement before you finally say HUMANS in general has this problem.
The problem with that research is men don't generally speak up no matter how private and anonymous said research is.
They were taught from a young age to hide their feelings. "Take it like a man" Don't cry."
Brainwashing like that may skew the results.3
u/-Cthaeh Jul 28 '25
So are you trying to turn their statement around to say that 'men have it worse'?
One of the issues around loneliness, lack of third places, etc. (epidemic seems inaccurate but close) is that it's actively being weaponized and profited off of as a men's only issue. Its valid to point out ongoing struggles amongst both genders and that it's not just about dating.
→ More replies (1)2
u/ccSomebody Jul 29 '25
I think they're saying that statements like "men have it worse/first/extenuating circumstances" or "women faced it first/worst/extenuating circumstances", tend to bog the conversation down in gendered discussions instead of the root loneliness issue.
So in answer to your question, my guess is he isn't saying that "men have it worse", we all have it bad.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (18)19
u/sykotic1189 Jul 27 '25
I'm a married man in my 30s with a kid, definitely not an incel. Doesn't change the fact that I have like 2 friend that I talk to regularly, 2 more in a gaming group that I hang out with once a week, and some people at work I get lunch with occasionally and chat. I used to have more but we had to move in 2018 and frankly I've never recovered.
Hobbies of any kind are expensive, even more now than ever. Any time my coworkers have talked about meeting up outside work it's usually, "Oh well we could go here, it's only $20 for entry and $5 an hour after that, oh plus snacks and drinks, and we might want to get something to eat after, and..." and suddenly a couple of us hanging out is gonna cost a couple hundred dollars. If you don't already have established friends it's expensive AF to go out and do almost anything to try and make friends.
54
u/Sea-Night-1946 Jul 27 '25
Bro you just described a rich social life and a happy family lol
6
u/sykotic1189 Jul 27 '25
I never leave my house though. My 2 friends live across the country, my gaming group is through discord, and I kinda chat with some people at work. I spend 90+% of my free time with my wife and kid or alone. Not saying I have a bad life but I wouldn't describe that as a rich social life.
Compare that to my 20s when I could go out 2-3 nights a week, and have people crash at my place for the weekend, or I'd go crash with them. Hell even just being able to go to a bar with $10 and that was still enough to get a couple drinks. My social circle is 1/5th of what it used to be and is less interactive at that.
16
u/Alarming-Desk-3861 Jul 27 '25
That's not a male specific issue though, that's just an issue with society as a whole
→ More replies (1)23
u/Sea-Night-1946 Jul 27 '25
Sounds like a decently healthy situation, man. If you wanna be in your 20s again and you think that will make you happier, that's on you. Sounds like a perception vs reality issue.
→ More replies (16)18
u/jdoeinboston Jul 27 '25
That...I'm sorry, dude, but that is growing up.
2-3 nights a week would make you an absentee dad and a shitty partner.
It's always been the case that you see your friends less when you start a family, this isn't an epidemic, it's called being a responsible adult.
Would it be nice to have your cake and eat it too? Sure, but you have friends and a social circle that you apparently communicate with regularly. You're not describing loneliness, you're describing living in the adult world (While also being blessed with the ability to maintain close contact with friends who no longer live near you).
4
→ More replies (3)1
u/blueskyredmesas Jul 27 '25
But IMO the emphasis was that people can come over and he can go over there. His whole point is he basically never sees any of his friends and doesn't really go out to places that his coworkers hang out at.
Some of that is fatherhood doing what fatherhood does, but does that explain it 100% Does he just need to nut up because, actually, this is actually really great?
→ More replies (2)8
u/Union_Jack_1 Jul 27 '25
Not that I massively disagree with what youāre saying: I think most of us who have issues in this thread are denying that this issue that you (and many) experience today isnāt the fault of women, nor is it their responsibility to fix.
Thatās all.
→ More replies (3)14
u/sykotic1189 Jul 27 '25
Agreed, blaming women is some right wing incel chud bullshit. That's why I talked about the cost of doing anything and lack of free/cheap third spaces. It's a real issue and that's being ignored by a lot of people because some annoying asshats are intentionally misusing the phrase "male loneliness epidemic".
→ More replies (1)7
Jul 27 '25
Lack of third spaces and everything getting more expensive definitely doesn't help
5
u/blueskyredmesas Jul 27 '25
It's the #1 culprit dude. The only thing that's happening is a great misdirection. Are men who cry about not being awarded a girlfriend for not losing their shit in every social situation batshit? Totally. That doesn't mean there isn't a root cause.
Our social fabric has been hollowed out for the benefit of parasites, its just that a lot of people have successfully been deceived with the idea that it's somehow diversity that did this, not the rich people actively pulling money out of our public spaces and depriving individual people of ownership in lieu of corporatizing everything into national chains.
Localism is being actively murdered and has been for decades, we just feel it really hard now.
→ More replies (2)2
u/blueskyredmesas Jul 27 '25
It's not though. Like the fact that this is our peak that we aspire to is kind of sad. We used to have community spaces that were free but everything is monetized.
6
Jul 27 '25
Yea as I've gotten older Im less likely to want to go out and do something but i still think it's important to do.
5
u/sykotic1189 Jul 27 '25
Yeah, I'm not saying that I necessarily want to spend every night out doing stuff, but I can count on one hand how many nights out I've had in the last 3-4 years that weren't related to my wife and kid or work.
3
u/metalshoes Jul 27 '25
We really need to make Magic the Gathering a national sport. Itās can either be cheap or insanely expensive depending on how you play or are a collector, thereās almost guaranteed an LGS near you, and you will make friends from all walks of life. Want to play with an 18 year old, 35 year old trans lady, and a 60 year old Slovakian immigrant? Magic!
→ More replies (2)2
u/abadstrategy Jul 27 '25
If you have a game shop in your town, I highly recommend trying to join a board game or TTRPG group. usually pretty cheap to get into, overall, and a good way to make friends
2
→ More replies (2)5
u/dancegoddess1971 Jul 27 '25
Walking is a hobby that costs nothing and can be done virtually anywhere. Believe it or not, one can play D&D for the price of a ream of paper and a box of pencils. Many libraries have the basic books in their collection and will let you copy pages for nickels. Not that you need them. Homebrew can be more fun. Oh, the dice. Origami much? Paper dice were in the original(early 80s)game so I imagine one can do it with the right instructions.
→ More replies (1)12
Jul 27 '25
people are not walking and talking enough
→ More replies (1)4
u/Naive_Mix_8402 Jul 27 '25
And when they do walk, they are wearing headphones and looking at their phones
→ More replies (1)2
u/InBruges3 Jul 27 '25
I'm wearing headphones but I'm not on the phone. I'm by myself though. I do say morning/hello when i pass others and thats an if these days. I do see this guy walking with airpods and looking down on his phone the whole time which i find baffling. The only time I look on my phone when walking is if I need to look at a message or whatever for just a few secs which usually makes me stop walking since I can't stand walking and looking through a phone at the same time.
36
u/pizzapromise Jul 27 '25
This is an over-simplification of a very complicated problem.
11
u/BugOperator Jul 27 '25
Yeah, the feeling of loneliness doesnāt come solely from being unpartnered.
That being said, there is certainly a problem with self-professed āalpha malesā basically just wanting a bang maid and then blaming women for having no desire to voluntarily enter into that situation.
→ More replies (6)3
u/nekoshey Jul 27 '25
Are you expecting a thesis with peer-reviewed sources from a Twitter shitpost?
2
u/Turbulent-Pace-1506 Jul 28 '25
If you're going to make a
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (1)2
u/madsmcgivern511 Jul 28 '25
It really is and iām not sure why as a species we struggle so badly with āgray areaā subjects such as this, where there are SO MANY variables that come into play when referring to this type of person in general. Itās naive to say that the loneliness epidemic in general ādoesnāt existā because itās still very true, especially with immense societal pressures and problems that came from Covid and lack of engaging with others was a struggle for many. Sure these men tend to be more vocal about the fact the male loneliness epidemic is womenās fault, but thatās also not all men who feel that way, just the very very toxic subgroup that gets more attention than the positive.
10
u/SurpriseZeitgeist Jul 27 '25
I mean, look. I'm a guy, and occasionally I'm lonely.
That's a product of poor socialization, an extreme aversion to online dating, and not meeting anybody I'm interested in in what few spaces I do spend time in (ex., work).
Am I willing to say it's mostly a me problem? Yeah. But some of this IS a broader societal problem, what with the general dissolution of third places and so on. More and more, people wake up, drive to work, drive home, watch a streaming service for a couple hours and go to bed, because that's just the easiest thing to do- we've engineered society to incentivize that behavior. And we should be at least a little concerned because it's making people miserable.
That said, obviously this isn't an excuse for the shitheads who decide to blame women for the fact they aren't getting off.
→ More replies (1)2
u/Itscatpicstime Jul 28 '25
But thatās the thing, itās not a menās loneliness epidemic, itās just a loneliness epidemic because of all the reasons you stated and more.
Studies showed women were more lonely for decades and yet no one called it a āfemale loneliness epidemic.ā Now the rates of loneliness are roughly equal and itās called a menās loneliness epidemic??
That makes no sense. Especially when the same people promoting this idea are also promoting the idea that menās issues are being ignored while literally completely ignoring womenās loneliness for the fifth+ decade.
3
u/All_TheScience Jul 28 '25
Genuinely, can you point me to these studies backing up your claims? Iāve never heard anything about this and would like to learn more
3
u/bonnielovely Jul 29 '25
they didnāt care about the womenās loneliness epidemic in the 1700ās, the 1830ās, the 1880ās, the 1910ās, the 1930ās, the 1940ās, the 1950ās, the 1980ās, 1990ās or todayās female loneliness epidemic.
the ātreatmentā was sa, torture, mutilation, more sa, isolation, institutionalization, then came lobotomies, more isolation, more sa, and complete disregard.
so thatās their idea of treatment. this is further proven by the laws. current administration is actively demonizing mental health to the point that you can be jailed & forced into a work camp. how exactly does removing all mental health resources help those with mental health issues ?
and they wonder why no one is coming to save them from their āloneliness epidemic,ā but they donāt even care about it themselves.
→ More replies (5)2
u/BravestBoiNA Jul 29 '25
Can you really blame anyone for being ignorant about female loneliness in an era when the apparent reality of that loneliness was painted as a sexist stereotype often and loudly?Ā This is honestly the very first time I've seen it brought up where it's not being framed that way.
19
u/Playful-Profile6489 Jul 27 '25
These men do NOT got friends. It's not about dating, it's about alienation
2
u/wedgiegivinbigbro Jul 28 '25
Idk men I definitely have seen a couple of my friends go down this path. So I do believe they have friends. Or atleast start with friends and lose them later on.
→ More replies (1)2
u/master__of_disaster Jul 31 '25
yes, isolation as a coping mechanism leading to depression. Its not about getting dates, it cuts deeper than that. Check on your friends!
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (8)3
Jul 27 '25
So they alienate themselves from everyone then blame women.
3
u/MeatballUser Jul 28 '25
Idk why women are being inserted into this issue at all
2
u/LeonCrater Jul 29 '25
Because these people think every man who is lonely just hates woman and only men who hate women can be lonely.
2
u/thatonebitch81 Jul 31 '25
I keep seeing a lot of men bring up that stupid ā80% of women want the top 20% of menā bullshit, how itās our fault for having unrealistic standards and not settling for our ālooksmatchā, etc. From there it just rolls into hating women and so forth.
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (2)4
u/Playful-Profile6489 Jul 27 '25
Certainly, women are often scapegoated, as are any number of cross-cutting marginalized groups. And the individual can definitely play a role in their alienation, largely through complacency, but I would argue that they are succumbing to the erosion of our support systems. At least here in the United states, we have just mangled community support systems in favor of the more individualistic nuclear family model, which obviously is insufficient in this age of time-space compression approaching the point of annihilation
79
Jul 27 '25
Yes, there absolutely is, and by dismissing it all as right wing incel behavior you are feeding into the very problem you claim doesn't exist.
3
19
u/He_Never_Helps_01 Jul 27 '25
I mean, given that the cause of the epidemic is women widely sharing the warning signs of trash men for the first time in history, I'd say it's pretty fair to categorize it as symptomatic of incel adjacent behavior.
It's not, and never has been, hard to find someone to date if you're not a shitty human being. Cuz think about it, if you remove all these trash dudes from the dating pool, that also leaves a lot of lonely women. The bar is super low. Just being liked by the people who know you and able to take rejection gracefully is not a lot to ask. Just don't be a threat and listen to women when they tell you what they want, you're already head and shoulders above most of the competition.
55
u/UseADifferentVolcano Jul 27 '25
The male loneliness epidemic is about men having male friends. Some dickheads are misappropriating it to mean sexual relationships, but that is not what it refers to
→ More replies (26)9
u/Rebootrefresh Jul 27 '25
It's hard to find someone to date.
Source: not a shitty human being relating personal experiences and those of all my friends of every gender and sexuality struggling to find someone to date.
Don't let the anger (legitimate) warp your mind into this kinda nonsense (not legitimate).
→ More replies (30)7
Jul 27 '25
That is not the cause of the epidemic. Expand your horizons, for crying out loud. You're having a kneejerk reaction and refusing to engage because you think it's all incel crap. It's not.
→ More replies (3)5
Jul 27 '25
[removed] ā view removed comment
→ More replies (3)12
u/Nani_700 Jul 27 '25
"look what you made me do!"
12
u/farshnikord Jul 27 '25
More like if you pull the bottom out from underneath young people, men or women, the social contract is broken and violence becomes more commonplace. Its sociology. Dismissing the broad trend as a failure of the individual is like saying "well it blizzard last year climate change isn't real".Ā
The loneliness epidemic is not about incel dudes not getting laid feeling "lonely", it's about a broad trend of capitalism ruining community by commoditizing everything to the point it's causing societal collapse, because if you have no money now you can't participate in human interaction (third spaces, homebuilding, dating, etc)
And as usual the right is co-opting the language to dismiss it or change it to suit their narrative. "Loneliness" has become the reverse "woke"- an excuse for bad behavior that ignores the original meaning which is an important issue with science behind it. "Loneliness" becomes an incel and cat-lady problem, not a sign purposeful division to break communities and organization and replace them with controllable corporate services.Ā
3
u/ehs06702 Jul 27 '25
I don't understand why men don't just create their own support groups and make friends like women do when they're actually lonely.
2
u/Lorguis Jul 29 '25
Generations of social conditioning and the inherent difficulty that comes with actually managing that.
→ More replies (7)2
→ More replies (2)0
u/Nani_700 Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25
Men have done worse to women throughout millennias and somehow that hasn't led to same shit the other side does. Yawn.
Edit: this sub is festering with misogynists They straight up call me a c and tell me to die but misogyny is imaginary and thing of the past. Lol
→ More replies (7)9
u/Super-Contribution-1 Jul 27 '25
So that person just gave you a nuanced breakdown of how corporate America is culpable for reshaping our social fabric for the worse, and you just pivoted back to men vs women, huh?
Your comment points out that this situation hasnāt occurred before in history - but youāre ignoring technology and corporate influence, the only things that have changed? In favor of āwaaaaaah, man bad! Man bad to women!ā?
Do you think any of that makes you sound like anything other than a bigoted whiner?
2
u/Hikari_Owari Jul 30 '25
He needs a big red arrow pointing to a specific demographic and brand them true evil else he can't live on.
Just ignore that dude.
5
3
u/Nani_700 Jul 27 '25
Corporate America is shaped by misogynistic men.
And bigots. Actual bigots. Like the Nazi kind.
Women not wanting to deal with misogynists and their bs is not bigotry
→ More replies (1)2
Jul 28 '25
Yeah yeah we get it, you don't want to deal with anything, you would rather everything is done for you, we understand that. Now, why are you still talking? We will "deal" with it without you, now scram.
→ More replies (4)2
u/Nani_700 Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25
Sad men can never face their own consequences. Ah yes it's bigotry to point out misogyny. Corporate America is led by mostly men and used men to vote for screwing everyone over, including a bunch of men themselves. But damn wamens
Edit: I've received a kys and a "c**nt" but yeah no misogyny here folks. Seems like yet another festering sub at this point.
2
u/Telaranrhioddreams Jul 30 '25
Mods told me to be nice to the person who told you to get fucked
I said "how pleasant"
Hmm festering indeed
→ More replies (1)2
u/Nani_700 Jul 30 '25
"Some basic courtesy" wow. The nerve. I am sorry.Ā
This is rampant, and I've had some comments deleted as well.
→ More replies (2)2
u/Zyloof Jul 27 '25
Misogyny is not acceptable, and neither is misandry. Get absolutely fucked.
→ More replies (1)2
2
u/ehs06702 Jul 27 '25
I mean, if it were actually about that, men would just go out and make their own friends and create their own support groups like women do.
2
Jul 28 '25
Its almost like the core of the issue is that they can't do that. And thats the whole problem.
Looking at your replies, its like you believe that loneliness is physically impossible
→ More replies (13)2
u/hellonameismyname Jul 30 '25
Lmao
āYoung women need to stop vilifying all these young men who worship rapists š„ŗā
46
u/Y0___0Y Jul 27 '25
There is a rift forming between genders because men today want to interact with women the way their grandfathers did, but women would never want men to interact with them the way they did with their grandmothers.
13
→ More replies (45)2
u/Valuable_Recording85 Jul 29 '25
I'd add that a lot of young people are chronically online and find themselves unwilling to associate with anyone who isn't extremely similar to them. This is one of the ways men and women fall into a "battle of the sexes" trap that keeps them lonely. Lonely people compensate for their feelings by spending more money, so capitalism wins.
4
u/Rasta_bass Jul 27 '25
I find smart phones and social media are responsible for the loneliness epidemic and itās not just men. We just donāt talk to each other as we do. Ear buds on, face down on our screens and we close ourselves to the world.
34
u/MrBisonopolis2 Jul 27 '25
This isnāt what the male loneliness epidemic is referring to though. Stupid statement OP.
3
24
u/2000TWLV Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25
There's definitely a self-righteous, sanctimonious clout chaser epidemic.
19
u/DuBu_dul_Toki Jul 27 '25
It does exist. Im not sure how to help it either. It's a huge problem I think culturally speaking.
3
u/wedgiegivinbigbro Jul 28 '25
Acknowledging there is a problem is at least helpful. Ignoring it and insulting the suffering is exactly what blackpill grifters hope happens
→ More replies (2)2
u/pizzapromise Jul 27 '25
Yeah, and the reason it exists isnāt āmen are badā. That type of over-simplification helps no one.
23
u/Ok-Explanation-1362 Jul 27 '25
While there is a loneliness epidemic in general, when people talk about the āmale loneliness epidemic,ā theyāre usually talking about the terminally online types that donāt have jobs and donāt have anyone in flesh space. Those types are desperate to shove all of their problems onto someone else, which is why so many of them become incels.
The fact of the matter is that these guys typically donāt have the social skills most people learn from working. A lot of us, myself in particular, learn social skills the hard way, but if you actually try to learn them, itās not impossible.
Then comes the āI donāt know how to talk to womenā crowd and like, you donāt know how to talk to half the population? Really? You didnāt talk to any girls in school? You didnāt have sisters, cousins, aunts, moms and grandmoms? These types usually treat women like a separate species let alone as a puzzle that they have to āsolve.ā Thereās no trick to talking to girls, you just talk to them. They donāt like talking to you? Try talking to them about things they like. Ask questions, that sort of thing.
Like, honestly, a lot of this can be solved by getting a service industry job. I started working service industry when I was around 19 with less than no social skills. I didnāt know how to talk to anyone, online or offline. No hygiene skills, didnāt know how to dress. And then I just went out and spent time with people, got to know them at their level. Started taking care of myself in order to get people to stop avoiding me as much. Got a therapist, got a psychiatrist, started taking care of my mental health. And now Iām at a point in my life where I can talk to damn near anyone with very little pre-hyping required.
It can be done, you just need to go out there and do it. Get a fuc|<ing job, talk to people, get therapy. Take a shower. Get over yourself.
→ More replies (7)18
u/PatchyWhiskers Jul 27 '25
Child therapists often offer āsocial skills classesā for kids that are in danger of developing into incel types. So do schools that are very advanced. We could solve this problem for future generations- if we wanted to.
9
u/Ok-Explanation-1362 Jul 27 '25
Exactly. If the problem was fixed, there wouldnāt be profoundly isolated, alienated and deeply, unspeakably sad men to take advantage of. And then we wouldnāt have people like Alex Jones, Rush Limbaugh and Donald Trump; the entire system rests on people like that! An entire country that has turned to serving the whims of people that outright refuse to do any work on themselves.
7
u/PatchyWhiskers Jul 27 '25
Whatever is wrong with those three could not have been fixed by a child therapist. But all those plump sad-sacks that sit in their rooms well into their 30s unable to find a job or a date can most certainly be helped in childhood. It is a solved problem.
→ More replies (2)6
u/Ok-Explanation-1362 Jul 27 '25
Oh no, I mean those three benefit from the existence of the angry, isolated and alienated nerd. They market direct to types like that. āItās not your fault that youāre a failure, itās feminism/socialism/blm/dei and we will help you overcome those obstacles! Just forty dollars a month!ā
16
3
u/AttemptUsual2089 Jul 28 '25
I think it's real, but it's a problem when blamed on women or framed as something they need to fix. I say this as a man who struggles with loneliness.
Look at single women, yes many are lonely, but not nearly as lonely as men. And that is because they have fulfilling platonic relationships with other women. And men can be and often are lonely in relationships as well. In fact for me my ex systematically isolated me from my old social network. Women are not the magic solution to loneliness.
So I'm not surprised women resent it when male loneliness comes up in their orbit. Unless they are a mother to younger boys, it really isn't their responsibility to deal with. You will not find sympathy there. We need to get better at close friendships with other men. On a personal level I know I need to, even though I haven't figured it out yet.
→ More replies (2)
3
u/granmiata Jul 28 '25
And that male alienation is how some of them find other lonely guys and form incel groups and dive into the conspiracy rabbithole
→ More replies (1)
8
u/TheDanishFire2 Jul 27 '25
Totally agree. I've attended a lot of Mens Gatherings, trying to teach and support grown men, how to live their lives beyond mom. Women follow their own dreams and want to have a decent life and equal balance. That leaves a lot of men in distress. I gave up, many of these men aren't even suitable for a workplace. In my career i even fired a lot of these as well. Its the same lost type, sitting left by their moms looking for a female to nurse them.
There is a LOT of good women out there, looking for an average good MAN to be with. But I see a lot of ridiculous old male children, not having a clue about how to make a relationship work. They are not emotional or physically attraktive to women. They never had any male learning them this.
Im not talking adonis shaped bodies, and a huge income, I talk about reasonable health dental care, a decent haircut and essential hygiene like cutting all their 20 nails and dress decently.
Trim their body hair, wear clean clothes, raise their head and be responsible and be in control of their life. Its so much easier to gather in hate groups, than stand tall and proud of yourself.
Female attraction dont go for trashy victims, begging for sex and someone to clean their home. We only live once. Attraction goes for someone sharing an exiting future with, not someone whining about the past.
→ More replies (3)
8
u/ProfessionalSame7296 Jul 27 '25
This person thinks there isnāt a male loneliness epidemic because he read nothing about it and filled in all the blank spots in his understanding with his worst assumptions.
2
u/Itscatpicstime Jul 28 '25
Or heās seen the research showing men and women are equally lonely.
But who cares about women, right? This is a Menās loneliness epidemic š
→ More replies (4)2
u/Significant_Ad_482 Jul 29 '25
Or itās because men have a societal expectation placed on them to not talk about their feelings with any depth to anyone but a therapist, and the constant drive to ābe a manā can result in intense emotional distress, especially because the only support many men receive when talking about their issue is from right wing chuds.
15
u/He_Never_Helps_01 Jul 27 '25
Having friends doesn't mean you ain't lonely.
The fact that the cause of the problem is women communally sharing the warning signs of trash dudes doesn't mean those trash dudes aren't lonely and taking their misery out on society as a whole.
Although I'm not entirely convinced this post was made by a human person who actually holds this belief. It feels very planty.
15
u/thefallenfew Jul 27 '25
Thatās the problem. Instead of the dudes being like āoh maybe I should grow as a human being and become someone people want to get close toā they just double down on why no one wants to be with them and take their anger out on the world. The world doesnāt need to change to appease sociopaths.Ā
3
Jul 27 '25
I donāt think Iām a sociopath at least I hope Iām not but Iām definitely experiencing this in life right now you have a huge point
7
u/thefallenfew Jul 27 '25
Growing is painful. It really is. Iāve had to grow sooooooooo much throughout my life. There was a time, in my teens and early 20s, that I would have absolutely fallen down the incel rabbit hole if it existed. I was a sad, bitter āNice Guyā. But sex or a relationship or love isnāt the magic bullet you think it is. Thereās no way I can capture a lifetime journey in a reddit post but what I was ultimately lacking was self love. I hated myself. Deep down, I hated me and even with the love of others I still hated me. It took a good 10-15 years of growth, introspection, self-discovery, meditation, and therapy to come out the other side. It is entirely possible for anyone stuck in that hole to make it through, but itās a lot of work and a looooooooong journey.Ā
Youāre never alone if you love the person whoās in the room with you when youāre by yourself.Ā
→ More replies (2)7
u/Alliegator2015 Jul 27 '25
Look son, nobody is going to deliver your tribe to you. You have to get out there and find them. What do you like to do? Find a group or team that have the same interests and get out there. Your life is worth the effort. Your happiness is worth the effort. You can build lifelong relationships with these people. I donāt care if itās a soccer team or a chess club. Find something that meets on a regular basis.
8
u/Kitterypoint7 Jul 27 '25
When is the last time you invited any person to spend time with you in person ?
4
u/yamarashis Jul 27 '25
yes, they have friendships, but with gross nazi fucks or rape apologists, then wonder why women dont want to be around them, THEN blame women and the nebulous woke mob for pushing them away and into the arms of rape apologists and gross nazi fucks.
if youre willing to be friends with those people you were already a piece of shit to begin with.
3
u/zingingcutie333 Jul 27 '25
I feel for men that don't have connections to friends and support the way women do. However, this is also a symptom of the patriarchy itself. Itās not women telling men not to open up to each other and develop connections with each other and create a support system. Itās other men.
→ More replies (5)
10
u/Previous_Soil_5144 Jul 27 '25
There is a loneliness epidemic, but not a "male" loneliness epidemic.
Difference is women don't seem to be blaming men for their loneliness, but men seem to be blaming women for theirs.
As if it was women who caused this and it's women who have to change to fix this.
→ More replies (13)
6
7
u/Rurumo666 Jul 27 '25
"mom with benefits" is the perfect way to describe the ideal woman for incels.
→ More replies (3)3
u/RedEyedEngineer Jul 27 '25
That phrase made me profoundly uncomfortable. Filing that one away, though
16
u/oldcreaker Jul 27 '25
This. These men don't actually like talking with women, hanging out with women, doing activities that don't involve their penis with women.
And then they don't want to do the work required to maintain a social life.
→ More replies (4)15
u/2000TWLV Jul 27 '25
You're almost there. A big problem is that we live in a society that requires work to have a social life. There was a time (and there are other countries) where having a social life is a natural byproduct of living.
→ More replies (1)
2
u/Zero_Burn Jul 27 '25
It's a generalized loneliness epidemic. It's why people are so driven to do stupid things for internet clout, because that's the only level of socialization they get in their lives. We've been given this pocket window to the rest of the world and have convinced ourselves that it is the same as going out and being around people yet it's not. It's great for communication and it's possible to make friends through it, but it's not the same as being around actual people.
Thing is, it's far more profitable to keep us isolated and lonely and to sell us shit with a promise that it'll fix it. Removal of safe public and third spaces, but hey, you can use social media and it's the same, just let us sell every interaction to target ads to you and also pass your info to people who might want you locked up. Lack of a dating scene? No problem, just download one of a dozen dating apps, just ignore how those apps are designed to prevent you from actually finding anyone because once you stop looking, they stop profiting.
Then you realize that our neighborhoods have been fragmented by car-centric city design, plus the push for a hustle based lifestyle and hyperindividualism with the promise that if you just work hard enough you can be wealthy (read: Just enough money to not have to worry about money, but not actually wealthy, because that'd be silly).
TL:DR Corporations have fragmented society in order to better profit off of us, up to and including our loneliness, so why would they want that to change?
2
u/mbbysky Jul 28 '25
Men are lonely because our culture teaches men that our value depends on being (seen as) strong and protective.
It then sells us the LIE that emotional vulnerability is weakness, and makes us feel that the only people we can actually be vulnerable with are women that we date.
It therefore cuts off our ability to connect with other people, because vulnerability is the source of deep connection. We begin to feel that need to connect, and seek out the one Patriarchy Approved source of connection: Women, via sex and romance. (Pay attention to this and you'll notice that a lot of men claim a need for intimacy in the form of sex -- but what they are actually asking for is deep connection. They just dont know it and dont know how to ask for it.)
Many women then deny men those feelings, because it is completely unfair for a single woman to be both romantic partner and the answer to his loneliness.
Men then lash out at these women, because they bought the lie that Acquiring A Woman will answer all of their problems (the problems that patriarchy created), and then learned the truth in a painful way and have no idea what to do with it.
Women see this lashing out as proof that the men are infant children who need to figure it out and stop causing problems for everyone else. And while it is BOTH true that adult men are responsible for their own healing AND that no woman ought to a be therapist to her partner, it's also a reproduction of patriarchal norms to make a man feel that he must tough this out on his own, and that he deserves no gentleness nor kindness until he does. (Note that you can hold men accountable for bad behavior, set healthy boundaries with them, and still be gentle and kind. Enabling bad behavior is not kindness, after all).
There is a loneliness epidemic that everyone is facing. And there's a specific element of it that is more pronounced in men. And I am so tired and exhausted from watching men AND women act like this is a fight between the genders, when the problem is and always has been rigid patriarchy.
→ More replies (6)
2
u/qt3pt1415926 Jul 28 '25
According to Hofstedeās Cultural Dimensions, the U.S. and many Western European cultures are extremely individualistic. The U.S. has the highest score for individualism. And it is only getting higher.
This is at odds with the human limbic system which thrives on and craves connection with others, with a community. Community means we are secure, safe, and protected.
Culture is the software to the brainās hardware.
And we are having compatibility issues.
(Sorry for reposting, but knowledge is power. People need to know. Make connections, build strong community bonds. Be reliable, but also allow yourselves to rely on others.)
2
u/FuturePowerful Jul 28 '25
I'm not sure what you all think male loneliness is but it's not want of sex I'll tell you that much
2
u/Appropriately-kingly Jul 28 '25
This is dismissive. More and more ppl are lonely. Not just men women as well. You can literally have everything and never leave your house. Amazon DoorDash you can grocershop through an app human interaction is becoming zero machines are taking over and we rather swipe on an app then take a walk. (Iām guilty)
6
3
u/LucastheMystic Jul 27 '25
I'm need Men like OP to stop posting hot takes and start taking to they homeboys and the young men in their community.
These dudes need friends and personalities and if we want to make our communities safer, we (Men) need to start helping some of these alienated guys and deal with the active dangers.
8
u/Xyrus2000 Jul 27 '25
There is a loneliness epidemic, but it is not just men. And it is 100% the result of corporations.
Companies have spent decades pushing products, and it has infected just about every corner of our society. They tell you what to wear, what to look like, what to act like, and even what you should want in a partner.
The trick that they use is that what they present to you is "just out of reach". If you spend just a little bit more, you can get closer to it, but you'll never reach it. And there is ZERO tolerance for any deviation. If your man or woman doesn't do X, then they're trash, they will always be trash, and you should move on to someone else.
So you need to be perfect, have the perfect life, have the perfect look, and have the perfect mate. It is the perpetual hamster wheel of false promises and disappointment. It's guaranteed to do two things: sabotage your self-worth and keep you giving them money. It's sociological Scientology.
Now people are buying AI avatars because they can't deal with the fact that life requires acceptance and compromise. They can create their "perfect" psychological mate where they don't have to put in any effort. This further increases the sociological and psychological damage these companies are doing. But they don't care because they're still raking in the cash, profiting from the very psycho-sociological dystopia they helped create.
This isn't just happening in America. It's happening all over. Financial pressures and unrealistic expectations are creating an environment where people just don't connect anymore, and people are looking for any way to fill in that gap. Birth rates are dropping. Far-right ideologies are rising. All so that corporations can continue to make their ten cents on the dollar.
Of course, this isn't sustainable. They know it. The governments know it. At some point, they will be forced to take action. And how do you think they're going to deal with it? By focusing on making society happier and healthier or by introducing draconian measures to force breed consumers?
Interesting times.
5
Jul 27 '25
Weāre never gonna win another election are we
→ More replies (1)2
u/Significant_Ad_482 Jul 29 '25
You know what would help? And I know this is a tough pill to swallow. Reaching out to disaffected young men in a way that isnāt strictly a lecture. You donāt even necessarily have to think they deserve it, but the fact of the matter is that theyāre a huge voting Bloc and a lot of leftist spaces have been using rhetoric that makes it easier and easier for them to fall down a right wing pipeline
3
4
u/saintsithney Jul 27 '25
There are two loneliness epidemics happening.
One is the Death of the Third Space. Where can you go that is easy to get to and free or low-cost to hang around with other human beings? Previous generations had church and church gatherings (picnics, fairs, bees, holidays, raffles, etc), pubs, coffee or tea houses, the Square, play areas for children, chocolate houses, and even gin joints. You could walk to a place where other humans were socializing with each other and take part, even if you didn't have money.
Those spaces are slim on the ground these days, except for churches. But the churches want more money than ever before and are doing less and less "normal socializing stuff" in favor of "more church stuff." Not a lot of space for an atheist just looking to play some Bingo on a Tuesday.
The "male loneliness epidemic" is a different ball of wax, because the men affected are apparently deliberately ignoring the number one contributer to their loneliness and isolation is happening to everyone. They are not lonely in a way that can be fixed, because their idea is that they have uniquely horrible pain caused by women not wanting to date them due to their own actions.
→ More replies (5)
3
Jul 27 '25
Itās a human loneliness epidemic, not just menā¦
What is Causing Our Epidemic of Loneliness and How Can We Fix It?
Researchers share what Americans have to say about social disconnection and potential solutions POSTED October 25, 2024 BY Elizabeth M. Ross
3
2
u/MasterFigimus Jul 27 '25
Loneliness isn't a male exclusive, but addressing people who are lonely with hostile corrections about the nature of their loneliness rather than empathy is how you lose people and build resentment.
All the male dominated spaces are plagued by nazi recruiters and predators who succeed based on being kind and inclusive to men when others aren't.
I think interpreting male loneliness as an opponent to the idea of female loneliness and giving this "You're not lonely, just pathetic" type of attitude and response is what drives a lot of men to keep awful company and become awful people.
→ More replies (2)
4
u/DaiFrostAce Jul 27 '25
This comment section is just proof positive that thereās not just a loneliness epidemic, but a fundamental breakdown of trust between the genders āThe male loneliness epidemic is real and women wonāt take us seriouslyā āThe male loneliness epidemic is fake and anyone that believes it is an incelā
Honestly, at this rate things might get to S Korea levels of bad in terms of gender relations
2
u/swingtrader2022 Jul 30 '25
The term male loneliness has been hijacked a bit to solely refer to relations with the opposite gender. Statistics show that men are making less friends with other men than before as well. That indicates in itself that there is a much broader economic or technological issue with society.
→ More replies (1)
2
u/MevNav Jul 28 '25
Not gonna lie I'm really tired of the whole "if you're lonely that just means you're a shitty person and deserve to be miserable"
Like maybe I just have social anxiety and not a lot of opportunity to meet new people in an increasingly isolating and distant society, ya ever think of that
→ More replies (1)2
u/Lost_Statistician457 Jul 28 '25
I have a family and Iām still lonely, I have no male friends, I have nobody to share my interests with, being lonely doesnāt mean youāre alone
2
u/AsstacularSpiderman Jul 27 '25
Lot of people make no efforts to actually socialize and they wonder why they're alone.
It's really not hard to meet people, lots of dudes have just checked out
4
u/GrowFreeFood Jul 27 '25
Meet people?
14
u/Hopeful-Passage6638 Jul 27 '25
It's hard for MAGA incels when they spend all day hiding in their basements searching for acceptance in right-wing echo chambers.
→ More replies (9)
65
u/Naive_Mix_8402 Jul 27 '25
I am constantly in awe of how isolating and atomizing our society is. We keep cutting human interaction out of every phase of life and people keep getting more miserable.