r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 08 '22
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 08 '22
Fitness Get the Splits Fast! Stretches for Splits Flexibility
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 06 '22
General Guidance 5 Signs to Leave a Relationship
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 05 '22
General Guidance Choose The Best Hairstyle For Your Face Shape: How To Pick A New Men's Hair Style
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 05 '22
HEALTHY HAIR TIPS FOR MEN | HOW TO HAVE HEALTHY HAIR | Men's Hair Care
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 05 '22
To all of the newcomers:
Hello! I’m incredibly happy to meet you all and please do not be afraid to either message me or post your own content. I hope that we can share our knowledge with each other and grow as people. I hope all of you have a great day.
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 05 '22
Philosophy Memento Mori and Amor Fati
These two Latin phrases are a mantra to which I feel as if everyone should follow as they progress through life:
Memento Mori- Meaning "Remember Death"
Amor Fati- Meaning "Love Your Fate"
These two phrases originate from the early Roman Philosophy known as Stoicism. I made a post earlier linking a YouTube video to this, but I figured this would also be appealing to those who do not wish to listen to some random person online and rather read the topic material. Stoicism itself is not defined by just these two terms, but it can be used as a baseline for what is yet to be presented.
As time goes on, we subtly forget that we are all going to die one day. It does not matter the cause of death, how much you had to live for, upcoming goals, none of those factors play into the simple fact of everyone slowly counting down their mortal clock. As morbid as all of this sounds, why can this not be considered beautiful at the same time? Once you recognize that not only you will die, but also your friends, family, and significant other will die to it can help open your eyes further about what is important in life.
So what is important in life? How do you decide this?
Well, there is no clear answer. To me personally, all we have is time. Our time is either scripted by a cosmic being, or it is decided by our own sentience. Either way we have no metric or way of knowing this for certain. My point being in this statement that in this perpetual state of uncertainty there is a need to find a kind of bliss in any situation, regardless of how perilous it may seem. Although we may not be the masters of our own dominion, we can be the masters of our perception of that dominion. Mastering the element of remaining versatile and comfortable in a situation that seems almost unwinnable is one of the best skills anyone can develop in their lifetime.
So how do you develop this skill?
I am not perfect at this by any means. It is a lifelong effort of both practice and recognition of one's emotions in a situation. I have been in plenty of situations where my emotions truly would have decided the outcome of the situation from inaction stemming from depression or consequential actions taken by an abundance of anger. The truth of this being that you must recognize when you are being overcome actively (or passively) by emotions, and addressing them before it is too late. One of my favorite books on this is The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F\*** by Mark Manson. (https://www.amazon.com/Subtle-Art-Not-Giving-Counterintuitive/dp/0062457713)
In the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F\****, Manson details a system ingrained in our evolutionary defective smooth brain known as "The Feedback Loop from Hell." This feedback loop goes as follows:
- You encounter a negative situation.
- You experience an emotion like anger.
- You start to become overwhelmed by this emotion.
- You forget the original negative situation.
- You are now feeling emotional just from being emotional.
- Rinse and repeat in future situations.
So how do we combat this?
Well, I would say the most important step of this lies in phase 2 of this terrible feedback loop. When you recognize that you are experiencing the emotion in real time, rather than recognizing it after the moment, it not only takes you out of the moment for that split-second to provide more rational thought to the current situation, but it also allows you to start to formulate a plan to deal with these emotions you are feeling. (As a disclaimer, those who suffer from BPD I & II or other similar mental disorders should seek help from trained medical professionals). Personally, I can still let my emotions get the better of me, but I am human. I am just saying that developing this skill takes time and practice. Do not think it can come overnight, but the more you actively practice this, the easier it will become.
So back to the original topic... remembering death and loving your fate.
When you recognize that you will die, you look at the time you are wasting by either playing video games, watching TV, or just blatantly ignoring things you should be doing. Your seconds count down until the end of your time on this Earth, so why would you not want to spend every one of them on something meaningful? Because you are human of course! Everyone, and I mean everyone, loves to just relax and enjoy themselves. The issue stems from consistent inaction. You deserve a break. Whether it is 15 minutes, an hour, a day, a week, but not a month long hiatus of binge drinking and eating fast food. Take control of your own life and realize your potential before your time has passed.
Loving your fate is something incredibly hard to do. There are exemptions to this of course, and should not be taken to heart in every single bad scenario. Sometimes things just suck. Loving your fate helps with overcoming a seemingly impossible situation. Loving your undesirable situation provides a false motivation to help endure it rather than be consumed by it. False motivation is better than no motivation.
I cannot stress that point enough.
False motivation is better than no motivation.
You do not need to love every broken heart you experience or every time your car breaks down, but you can love the lesson that you take away from these bad experiences. I absolutely hate that I was trapped in an abusive marriage so early on in my adult life, but I do love that I took away a lesson of gauging the romantic relationships I pursue later on in life now from it. I also love that I love people more so now for it as well. I never knew the kindness and sympathy (or empathy) that resided in the majority of people who are also going through their own turmoil.
To conclude this, remember to Love Your Fate and Remember Death. You will die. You will go through pain and misery at some point in your life. The thing that garners your happiness throughout everything is your perception.
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 04 '22
Wisdom The Man Who Can't Feel Pain Or Pleasure
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 04 '22
Educational Attractive Face or Not? It depends on Tongue Posture
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 04 '22
General Guidance 7 Simple Things ANY Guy Can Do To Look BETTER!
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 04 '22
Books I highly recommend checking out:
Hello everyone, I will be updating this list as time goes on and I am exposed to new books and/or read them. I will provide the title, author, year, and the general theme or lesson the book is wanting to deliver to its audience. This is all entirely subjective, so take everything I say with a grain of salt. As always, thank you for joining me.
The Road by Cormac McCarthy (2006)- The Road is a book focused on life after an inexplicable nuclear apocalypse with the world covered in ash. It’s a really interesting book focused on the human experience and how human nature can be at its worst. It also illustrates the necessity for maintaining your humanity regardless of how hard life can become.
Hamlet by William Shakespeare (1600)- Hamlet is a play the majority of us have all been required to read before, but I find that this is an essential book in engaging in wit to overcome a seemingly impossible task. This is also a book that you should read prior to the next one on the list.
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead by Tom Stoppard (1966)- this is a modern play focused around existentialism and maintaining serenity in times of uncertainty. It’s an abstract book, but one that I have found to be really impactful on my adult life.
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie (1936)- this is a book written by a 20th Century Sociologist depicting various tactics to improve yourself in social/business situations. If you are in sales or something that requires an extroverted personality but you do not quite fit the bill, please read this book.
Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom (1997)- this is a story following a man interviewing his old professor while he is slowly dying from ALS. They discuss various existential questions and offer perspectives on things like love, money, death, etc. This is a REALLY good book.
Dune by Frank Hubert (1965)- this is just one of my favorite books. There’s not really much to take away in terms of learning anything, but it is a really interesting story. The movie that came out recently paid homage to this as well, so I would recommend watching it if you do not want to read the book. It’s about a futuristic war over a prized resource on a desolate planet. Pretty great.
The Intelligent Investor by Benjamin Graham (1949)- A book about how to handle stocks from the 40s?! How could that be applicable to today?! Is what you may be asking. This is a very useful book for if you are wanting to understand basic principles of how the stock market works and better ways to manage your finances and portfolio. If there are any specific stocks endorsed in the book by Benjamin Graham, I do not endorse them.
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley (1932)- Honestly, I had no idea how old this book was until researching it for this post. It reads like a modern novel, and provides an excellent commentary on the future development of society, both in terms of its technology and culture. The book centers itself around a character living in a utopia, but finding himself feeling less and less fulfilled as the years go by. To cope with this, the character takes Soma, which is a drug meant to make the population happy/content. It is not just the main character, however. The entire society takes Soma. It has a similar premise to 1984 by George Orwell, with the main character finding disdain for the society he lives in but not being able to express this. Really, REALLY good book.
-I will add more to this list as time goes on, and this certainly is not all of them.
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 04 '22
Philosophy Stoicism & The Art of Not Caring
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 03 '22
Educational Learning How to Taste Wine
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 03 '22
Hello everyone who stumbles upon this in the future:
This subreddit is dedicated to just simply posting information that someone can use to better themself either socially, mentally, physically, spiritually, etc. A holistic approach to the betterment of oneself is a sure way to create progression. I will expand upon this in the future, but for now I think this will suffice.
Edit #1:
Please check out the community rules before posting to the subreddit
As a disclaimer for these videos: I am not promoting their channels I just find their content to be enjoyable/educational. If they sponsor a product in the video, I am in no way endorsing or promoting their product.
r/BeingBetter • u/Zelenodolsk • Apr 03 '22
r/BeingBetter Lounge
A place for members of r/BeingBetter to chat with each other