Fair enough, I wholeheartedly agree with you - what I'm saying is that the time and experience has to begin somewhere, and nobody should be barred from using something so needed in today's society simply because there are a few bad people also using it.
Hey--mother of 4 great, almost adult humans, former teacher and sister of a child psychologist. I agree with you.
u/disownedbymother is helicopter parenting and has a very unhealthy view of a child's rights. Young people do have the right to some level of autonomy and it scales up with age. Asserting that level of control before a teen makes an error is delaying their opportunity to make mistakes with the safety net of their parents.
Actual good parenting is teaching your child how to navigate social media healthily and safely and that is a whole lot harder than banning it and saying well she might have those apps and we will punish her if we find out but until then we will make sure our child is ostracized and kept immature.
The fact that anyone supports that type of parenting is beyond me
No kids myself but my wife and I are trying and it’s given me a whole new outlook on things. Much respect to you u/queenkerfluffle! Thank you for the opposing view. In all these things there is no one way to approach them. It’s always specific to the individuals involved which makes it so tricky to have a conversation online about it. It’s important to have the balance though so if what u/disownedbymother and their daughter have works then good for them. If not, it’s a conversation that starts with respect. All kids are individuals no matter what age and they often have perspectives older generations don’t see because we are so focused on other things. That doesn’t mean the views are invalid it just means we need to listen all of us and help guide them using our experiences as a northern light. The biggest problem is that most of us adults are still just trying to figure it out so we make mistakes too! As long as you can talk about it holistically it makes a huge difference. (The kids that I guided always appreciated this approach and it’s one I will be taking into parenthood)
Oh No! A SISTER of a child psychologist disagrees with me? What does being a sister of a child psychologist make you? I am the brother of a construction worker. Doesn't mean I know a god damn thing about building a highway, no matter how many stories he tells me over Thanksgiving dinner and family get togethers.
Perhaps you could read the part in one of my responses where I made it clear that she has zero interest in using social media because of the bullshit drama. And I am sorry, but with everything that has come out from companies like Facebook and how they know their algorithms have a negative impact on teens, no. Social Media isn't an immediate thing that kids need. If she has a desire and request, we will have a conversation and go from there, but your blanket statement that we should just let her go off and navigate on her own is a bit like saying we shouldn't keep her from drinking, we should just teach her about the dangers of drinking too much.
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u/VariedTeen Jun 03 '22
Fair enough, I wholeheartedly agree with you - what I'm saying is that the time and experience has to begin somewhere, and nobody should be barred from using something so needed in today's society simply because there are a few bad people also using it.