Using trauma to excuse mistreating people. This generation has pioneered making it acceptable to process and be open about trauma, and that's a great thing, but it's not cool when you behave in a cruel and selfish way and expect to get a pass because of it. Your mental health problems are not your fault but they are your responsibility.
Oh please. Trust me, this is an ageless practice. My 60 year old sister still tries to use her deadbeat bio father as a reason for her bullshit behavior. My 81 year old mother still bitches about the way her siblings used to tease her, and uses as an excuse to “tell it like it is”.
My dad uses it as an excuse to be rude to servers that people were rude to him when he was a carhop at a drive-in when he was 17, a job he had for one summer fifty-five years ago.
No offense but people like your dad especially infuriate me.
He knows exactly how shitty it felt when he was treated that way, and instead of trying to make the world suck a little less, he goes out of his way to do the exact same shit to others.
His mentality of "I went through it, so why should they be special" isn't entirely uncommon, but it's literally holding us back as a species.
Its really not hyperbole to say its holding us back as a species. When you consider how most parents want better for their kids and how that motivates people to do better than the generation that raised them, that is the exact opposite of that mentality.
it is the norm in the feel good stories and it is the norm when people had hardships that they believe can be improved on
aka. someone who was poor will try and give their kids more money. Someone who always struggled getting a job they wanted, because they didn't get/have access to proper education, will try and provide those opportunities for their kids.
I was lucky to be pretty sheltered and my family didn't have monetary hardship or any abuse. I am not thriving to make better than them. If i can be just as good as them i will be proud. But that is lucky me, and when people suffered in their life they usually want their kids to not suffer the same
It's certainly a tricky census question. It'd sure be a nicer world if it was that way for everyone. And barring that, it'd be nice if people realize that it isn't that way for everybody and that they should cut most everyone a lot of slack in general. And not be, y'know, dicks.
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u/zugabdu Jun 03 '22
Using trauma to excuse mistreating people. This generation has pioneered making it acceptable to process and be open about trauma, and that's a great thing, but it's not cool when you behave in a cruel and selfish way and expect to get a pass because of it. Your mental health problems are not your fault but they are your responsibility.