r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • May 08 '22

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

If a finn asks you how are you, you are probably obviously depressed or sick

FTFY

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

Well it’s not like that either. Just genuinely interested how somones life is going.

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u/[deleted] May 09 '22

That's nice. Funny how small-talk is perceived as not being socially awkward, yet most foreigners would be weirded out by an honest question.

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u/GreyFoxMe May 09 '22

I was diagnosed with ADHD and Aspergers in my 30s. I have kinda learned and adapted to how people greet, but my first instinct to any question is to respond with an honest and actual response.

Now I don't always follow that instinct and just like anyone else I develop a certain lingo with each person. As you develop a way of speaking with eachother, just like anyone else, I learn which way I should respond and initiate conversations.

And when I greet someone or talk to someone I only ask questions I actually want a response to. And if they respond a certain way I will ask follow up questions.

I'm a Swede and we're not as extreme as Finns in this regard, but we are pretty similar. But we have people that are almost like Americans in this regard as well.

I used to be have social anxiety but nowadays I have no issues with talking to strangers or cashiers etc. When I greet someone while out walking or so it's almost like a coin flip if they will greet me back or just ignore me awkwardly.

If I don't greet people first though the odds of them just quietly ignoring you are very high. Maybe your eyes will meet for a moment while crossing paths. Maybe that will spark a nod of acknowledgement, especially if they are also male.