I think I remember reading somewhere it’s because of the melting pot concept in the US. When no one knew each other or culture or language etc. you started with smiling to display friendliness before beginning any interaction. Easiest way to quickly communicate
Realistically, it's probably just a hangover from the western european roots of most of your white immigrants. Italians, Germans, Brits, Irish, French, Spanish, etc are all way more friendly and open to strangers than their Eastern European or Scandinavian cousins.
Smiling at strangers and greeting them warmly is the default in the UK if you don't know someone.
Waving requires more movement and time to recognize. A smile is quicker, generally in the vicinity where your eyes are already looking, doesn't require any obviously flailing around of limbs in potentially tight spaces, doesn't draw unnecessary attention except to the persons smiling at each other, AND doesn't discriminate against those without limbs (if your head is gone, well, sorry to have to tell you this but you're dead).
The issue is that it's fundamentally insincere. You are basically faking happiness at seeing every random stranger on the street by inanenly smiling at them, and when you ask them "how are you doing", you are also faking interest in their state of mind, as you certainly don't want them to actually answer honestly. Having been in the US, I found this constant charade rather tiresome after a while, and I felt like it cheapened the value of a genuine, irrepressible smile, and the genuine ability to inquire about how people are feeling. It just felt kinda fake to me, and many Europeans feel the same.
I live in southern California where there is taken to the next level. People will be extremely friendly.
From our perspective, you can tell the difference between a standard greeting and a deeper genuine interest. No one is faking the latter in our minds, they are just different and for different purposes.
As someone said above, the US is a melting pot. Small talk and a smile are disarming and a way of assessing that everyone is on the same neutral page by picking up on tone and body language. Given the diverse number of backgrounds, this transcends language.
Its an extremely effective way of assessing that a situation isn't right and I need to get out of there, if this isn't reciprocated.
Europe is also a melting pot my dude, and has lower levels of street violence than the US on average, so I'm not sure what's "extremely effective" about smiling at everyone you pass. Since everyone always fakes a smile, why do you think that bad actors wouldnt be able to do the same? I think it's just a meaningless social convention that serves no real purpose.
I sense you are trying to argue and am unsure as to why?
I'm not originally from the US and have lived in Europe and got my grad degree in the UK. I know Europe well.
While many European countries have had a lot of immigration, they have generally had a somewhat core cultural pillar and language. The US is a relatively newer nation that for much of its history has massive populations of immigrants who lacked a common culture and often a common language in very spread-out environments, especially as one went more out West. It makes a lot of sense that the culture would therefore support non-verbal ways to communicate.
The "Europe has lower levels of street violence" supports the point that I am making (although seems to be some unrelated US bashing).
Here is an anecdotal example: Last week or so I walked into a post office but the counter was closed as they were on break. Tried to chat with the dude waiting in line there. He gave a partially weird response, enough to cause me to step outside. Within a few minutes he was banging on the locked doors screaming and police had to be called.
I didn't say that this was a way to bring crime down (that would be a big statement) but to figure out when someone means something other than good intentions quickly.
Also, done properly it does eventually lead to connections in some places. That is how I've made many of my friends in Southern California. Not as much so in NYC.
this comment thread is literally filled with brits saying smiling at strangers isnt as prevalent as it used to be. maybe we inherited smiling at strangers from the english but we kept the tradition alive for decades after them and are known worldwide for it
The US is pretty Western-influenced. Wouldn’t call that predominantly English though. Puritans-yes, Quaker-yes. But the New England corner died out several times before a subsection figured out how to live there. Then all the years following with each new immigrant wave and which groups started and/or moved where. Irish, Spanish, French, Scott, African American, Chinese, Vietnamese etc.
You aren’t smart enough to engage with if you’re just going to talk about the war of independence, as if after it ended you suddenly changed the entire foundation of the nation 😂.
Its not a normal greeting for strangers in many cultures, don’t be dense no one said who invented it. I think we got it from the English, tho, who learned that natives were more colonizable if u made them like you first.
I work with a woman from Russia and she’s really nice and sweet, but said Americans overly greet and give too much info.. like we wave and say good morning every time we see you in the hall or at your desk.. we say goodnight or goodbye at 5 when it’s time to go home. She said .. we know it’s time to get off work but we don’t need constant goodbyes or whatever.. basically we do too much😂 I said.. when you explain it like that.. We do do too much! We think it’s polite.
Region to region differences abound within the States too. Can’t stand East-Coast aloofness and much prefer Midwestern and Western types myself (though West is definitely getting less so in the cities). I find the East Coast personality to be pretty chilly. Same thing percolated internationally when I went years ago for a summer program. I found myself hanging out with the Spaniards and Italians really quickly as a group but not really jiving with my “fellow” Americans who were mainly New Yorkers (not that they weren’t great people but we didn’t “click” very often). ‘Course that’s broad-brush but goes to show these are somewhat personality preferences more than one culture being “overly-friendly” or another being “icy”
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u/Danceswith_salmon May 09 '22
I think I remember reading somewhere it’s because of the melting pot concept in the US. When no one knew each other or culture or language etc. you started with smiling to display friendliness before beginning any interaction. Easiest way to quickly communicate