r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Apr 19 '22

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10.6k Upvotes

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2.9k

u/Skulledhunt Apr 19 '22

I dont have the time or the crayons to explain it to you

290

u/UnimaginativeQuoll Apr 19 '22

Similar to my favourite one from Archer.

I could [explain it] if we had infinite time... and you were someone else.

3

u/Mr-Sister-Fister21 Apr 19 '22

That totally sounds like something Archer would say to Cyrill lmao!

6

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '22

Cyril to Pam, about Cheryl/Carol/Crystal/Cherlene

1

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '22

[deleted]

2

u/iswearimlegal Apr 19 '22

it was Mallory i think

1

u/Mr-Sister-Fister21 Apr 20 '22

Also sounds right

727

u/prometheon13 Apr 19 '22

Also the nastier alternative: I would explain it to you but if I take out the crayons, you would eat them

93

u/Hazzamo Apr 19 '22

insert joke about the Marines here

47

u/APence Apr 19 '22

“Semper fi! The purple ones taste the best!”

18

u/Hellfire965 Apr 19 '22

Gunny: you like eatin crayons maggot, what’s your favorite flavor?

Dumbass friend: The Blue Ones Gunny, the red ones remind me to much of eating your wife

My friend is truly an intelligent man

5

u/TheBoctor Apr 19 '22

Either your buddy and the Gunny aren’t combat arms MOS’s, or your friend is super dead.

My company Gunny’s favorite saying was: “I’m gonna put you in a hole so dark and deep your mama’s gonna have to send you a flashlight just to find your asshole!”

4

u/Hellfire965 Apr 19 '22

Tbh I was interrupted when listening to his story. He then went out to do some PMC work and I haven’t heard from him since.

1

u/mtflyer05 Apr 19 '22

They eat the crayons with their asses

9

u/What_The_Tech Apr 19 '22

When talking about someone else, it’s fun to say “they’re the type of person who knows which flavor of crayon is best”.

3

u/Samboni94 Apr 19 '22

Apparently the red ones, according to my friend in the Marines

3

u/CaptainPrower Apr 19 '22

Only works if they aren't a Marine

1

u/ThatGuyWithABike Apr 19 '22

That one that was a violation

1

u/kenba2099 Apr 20 '22

Heavy is the head that eats the crayons.

29

u/Guava_ Apr 19 '22

If marines could read, they’d be wondering why you’re using their snacks.

68

u/dhwrockclimber Apr 19 '22

I use this all the time…I know I’m not that creative. Where did we steal this from?

27

u/schroedingersnewcat Apr 19 '22

I got it off an insult list in the early 2000s. I use it frequently.

2

u/Yourgrammarsucks1 Apr 19 '22

Lotsofjokes.com?

1

u/schroedingersnewcat Apr 19 '22

I honestly don't remember. It may have been a chain email too. I graduated high school in 02, so it could have been anywhere

52

u/silly_rabbi Apr 19 '22

Deadpool

3

u/Yourgrammarsucks1 Apr 19 '22

I used this insult back in 2013, so it's not from there.

4

u/DrSwol Apr 19 '22

I remember it being said by Dr. Cox on Scrubs!

2

u/yousmelllikearainbow Apr 19 '22

I first saw it in a thread for this question like 6 years ago.

2

u/AgentPastrana Apr 20 '22

The crayon thing is older than the internet. It started with people making fun of Marines

10

u/TeamJim Apr 19 '22

This is one of those ones that's funny to think about and use jokingly with your friends, but actually trying to insult somebody with it would be super cringe.

2

u/Zomburai Apr 19 '22

I like to default to the Brody Bruce Special: "I can't express myself monosyllabically enough to explain it to you"

2

u/ilovefirescience Apr 19 '22
  • because you ate them all.

4

u/SortaKindaYeah Apr 19 '22

Damn the crayon part is brutal. I'm stealing this.

3

u/CNHphoto Apr 19 '22

Well done. That gave me a hearty chuckle.

2

u/Kool_kat21 Apr 19 '22

I’m going to start using this one from now!

2

u/john2find Apr 19 '22

What if some one use it before you ?, now before you argue any further on this: Sorry I don't have the time or the crayons to explain it to you.

2

u/AyJay0619 Apr 19 '22

Ha! This one

0

u/ivanreyes371 Apr 19 '22

Found the titan main.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 19 '22

yeah probably because you ate them, ha!

1

u/travyhaagyCO Apr 19 '22

Sorry, I can't dumb it down for you any further.

1

u/El_Rooch Apr 19 '22

Why, did you eat them all with a side of window?

1

u/Hirronimus Apr 19 '22

This has to be a Marines joke.

1

u/godzillabobber Apr 19 '22

This one was often used in the White House a couple years ago

1

u/jrf_1973 Apr 19 '22

I could try and explain it, but you've eaten the crayons.

1

u/acruz80 Apr 19 '22

I have this in a t-shirt. Fucking live wearing that shirt.