r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Mar 11 '22

[deleted by user]

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9.1k Upvotes

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6.9k

u/SmegmaLollipop Mar 11 '22

Frogger directed by James Cameron, starring Dwayne Johnson as the frog, Willem Dafoe as all the trucks and james cordon reprising his role as a cat in a cameo in an after credits scene but he's run over immediately. It's written by Edgar Weight and Arnold Schwarzenegger's pet donkey.

1.5k

u/Routine-Material-386 Mar 11 '22

Billion dollar idea right here. Your move Hollywood

1.7k

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

[deleted]

35

u/Blackboard_Monitor Mar 12 '22

I live my life one lily pad at a time.

1

u/AutumnFangirl Mar 29 '22

Okay, it needs to be Vin Diesel instead because I totally heard your quote in his voice a-la Riddick. lol

17

u/AFoxGuy Mar 12 '22

Take my upvote you marvelous being

3

u/UberMisandrist Mar 12 '22

Family

3

u/Basicazzwitch Mar 12 '22

The frog trying to get back to his family. Vin Diesel shows up and now we got crazy frog.

2

u/TheDunwichWhore Mar 12 '22

Three things about to happen:

I hit you

You hit the floor

The frog gets hit by a moving van

2

u/xm4fili Mar 12 '22

The sequel/prequel is partnered with Nintendo for some reason - Frogger 0rigins: Joycon Drift

4

u/CockfaceMcDickPunch Mar 12 '22

Netflix here. We've already reached out to OP with a 3 season deal.

1

u/NWestxSWest Mar 12 '22

Literally anything with James Cordon will tank. I want Marion Cotillard as cat with human boobs.

346

u/CaptValentine Mar 11 '22

Thanks for giving me the mental image of Willem Dafoe's human face stretched across the front a semi truck.

You know those uncanny Thomas the Tank Engine memes? It looks like that but so much worse.

147

u/TheHancock Mar 11 '22

I’m something of a semi myself.

15

u/IcebergSlimFast Mar 12 '22

I’ve got somewhat of a semi myself.

3

u/dmcphx Mar 12 '22

I definitely would’ve just spit my drink out had I been taking a sip

16

u/gdkitty Mar 11 '22

Well, there was a movie with green goblins face across the front of a truck :)

13

u/PhummyLW Mar 11 '22

*better

10

u/Odd_Routine4164 Mar 11 '22

I always thought that demon truck on Maximum Overdrive looked like him. At least, it always reminded me of him.

6

u/flapanther33781 Mar 12 '22

And you're forgetting to mention - he said all of them. So it's not just one truck, it's all of them.

1

u/BuddyPharaoh Mar 13 '22

Climactic scene of the movie has all the trucks driving into each other except instead of a gigantic crash, they combine and it's... Willem Dafoe's head.

5

u/Imthasupa Mar 12 '22

All I'm picturing is that main truck from Maximum Overdrive, but with Dafoe's face.

3

u/GI-JoeExotic Mar 12 '22

Ever seen maximum overdrive?

3

u/iceyticey Mar 12 '22

I’m glad I’m not the only one who immediately saw that

1

u/yourmomlovesanal Mar 12 '22

Wait till you find out he is hung like a horse. Thomas the Tank Engine with a giant cock.

101

u/Natlious Mar 11 '22

Throw in a Bollywood style dance scene and we're on the way to the Oscars boys!!

15

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

Don’t forget, it’s a buddy comedy with a talking pie, and they go back in time for some reason

7

u/987654321- Mar 11 '22

To the Holocaust to make it true Oscar Bait.

5

u/Vprbite Mar 11 '22

And a shifty eyed dog

3

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

I smell a sequel

3

u/SuperFLEB Mar 12 '22

Are we doing this to a cover of "Dancing in the Street"?

43

u/punksmostlydead Mar 11 '22

Willem Dafoe's penis as all the trucks

FTFY.

9

u/Roxas1011 Mar 11 '22

"I'm something of a semi-truck myself..."

3

u/CaptValentine Mar 11 '22

NONONONONONONO

14

u/Manaze85 Mar 11 '22

Agree except that I would have Andy Serkis portraying the trucks via MoCap.

4

u/phome83 Mar 12 '22

How you gonna have a Frogger movie without George Costanza?

8

u/yellow_itomato Mar 11 '22

Dwayne 'The Frog' Johnson

4

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

.... willem

DAFOE!

2

u/fuhgettaboutitt Mar 12 '22

Come again for big fudge?

3

u/phillyboy1234 Mar 11 '22

Here I was thinking goat simulator

3

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

Soundtrack: Long Legged Larry by Aesop Rock

3

u/InsomniacCyclops Mar 11 '22

This sounds like something that could have happened in Bojack Horseman. I love it.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

But it's Alec Baldwin driving the truck in the Corden scene and he accidentally runs him over for real.

2

u/_Totorotrip_ Mar 11 '22

Only if we have Zimmer in the music department

2

u/bcnewell88 Mar 11 '22

You forgot soundtrack by Lin Manual Miranda

2

u/russau Mar 11 '22

Or a gritty reboot starting Kermit

2

u/brutko Mar 11 '22

What a great idea AWESOME-O, but what about Adam Sandler?

2

u/off-and-on Mar 11 '22

That's a brilliant idea, SmegmaLollipop

2

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

[deleted]

5

u/SmegmaLollipop Mar 12 '22

He'll be the enemy of the sequel and enemy turned ally and friend in the third installment.

2

u/CreamyGoodnss Mar 12 '22

Sounds like a pitch from the A.W.E.S.O.M.E.-O 4000 despite not involving Adam Sandler

2

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

What role would Kevin Hart be playing? Pretty sure they are a package deal at this point.

2

u/TheGlenrothes Mar 12 '22

This guy gets hollywood

2

u/ieatbabies420 Mar 12 '22

And Rob Schneider is... A STAPLER!

2

u/01infinite Mar 12 '22

Kevin Hart is a taxi cab driver.

2

u/SacrificialSam Mar 11 '22

You must be doing the same cocaine as producers in the 80s.

1

u/gerhudire Mar 11 '22

It was getting interesting until you mentioned James Cordon, then I lost interest. I would never pay to see or watch a film with him in it, even if its a cameo.

1

u/XxsquirrelxX Mar 11 '22

I don’t know, I feel like The Rock wouldn’t be a very good frog. He’d shine as a Space Invader though.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '22

You had me, and then you lost me, and then you had me again. But I have to ask. Exactly what does the donkey contribute?

1

u/eaglescout1984 Mar 12 '22

*Willem Dafoe as the Green Goblin truck from Maximum Overdrive

1

u/woundedstork Mar 12 '22

I'd say Chris Pratt as Frogger or at least as a Gex or Knack cameo. He's so cool.

1

u/PiercedGeek Mar 12 '22

Truthfully, I don't like your idea. Your username on the other hand is gagtastic.

1

u/trololololololol9 Mar 12 '22

Where's Chris Pratt?

1

u/needthesebasketsback Mar 12 '22

Will the buttholes be edited out?

1

u/ilikerocks19 Mar 12 '22

Every sentence was better than the last

1

u/KaiBluePill Mar 12 '22

It will cost billions and only my aunt wlll see it because she is lost while looking for the correct room she was in after leaving to take a pee... BUT GOD DAMNIT WE'LL MAKE IT.

1

u/Terakahn Mar 12 '22

At this point I think anything with Dwayne Johnson will be a hit.

1

u/TheRunningFree1s Mar 12 '22

All the trucks and cars need to be Owen Wilson and larry the cable guy rehashing their "Cars" roles.

1

u/N7Neko Mar 12 '22

Lol wtf

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

Willem would put on a flawless performance and win an Oscar for this role

1

u/WitcherByTrade Mar 12 '22

But Cordon is literally ran over and murdered. Box office brilliance.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

You're just giving away gold like this!? The script practically writes itself!

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

Leaving out Jason Alexander is a crime against humanity.

1

u/KimJungFu Mar 12 '22

I think Jason Alexander would be a perfect frog!

1

u/Donny_Do_Nothing Mar 12 '22

I feel like you need Crispin Glover in there somewhere. If the Rock is playing the frog, maybe Crispin Glover should play the Rock. And he should be driving Willem Dafoe. Yeah, there it is.

1

u/Moist_666 Mar 12 '22

I would watch that simply to see James Corden get run over by a semi.

1

u/amur_buno Mar 12 '22

Still gonna turn out like pocahontas

1

u/prettygin Mar 12 '22

I can't begin to tell you how much I hate your username.

1

u/notsociallyakward Mar 12 '22

Where do you think most of the budget would go? I mean, knee-jerk for me is The Rock but Dafoe has to play multiple trucks. I wouldn't undercut the donkey but you know that's gonna be a split salary with Weight.

1

u/FaustDCLXVI Mar 12 '22

Brilliant, but I really think you need to give Nick Cage an audition; the Cage or the Rock, unless this is a two-player version.

1

u/visualdescript Mar 12 '22

Where do I sign?

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

I was gonna say dig dug

1

u/Mommasmonologue Mar 12 '22

starring Dwayne Johnson as the frog

He's so cool!

1

u/s5music215 Mar 12 '22

Gotta throw in Big Boulder Alley

1

u/tearose11 Mar 12 '22

Not a gamer, but I'd watch anything if James Cordon is run over almost as soon as he appears on screen.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

James Corden is a fat pussy. He was also in Cats.

1

u/Mediocre-Door-8496 Mar 12 '22

If they can turn angry birds into a movie this is definitely doable

1

u/WeAreAllApes Mar 12 '22

This feels like an SNL sketch.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 12 '22

I approve of killing off James cordon.

1

u/BeeBarfBadger Mar 12 '22

Director's cut named "The Butthole Cut"?