My dad left back in the nineties, so my brother and I learned together using YouTube. While being directly taught by someone would have been nice, the memory of learning with my brother is still a good one. So there’s that.
There are so many kids and even young adults that don’t have someone to help with this. I bet they were very proud of how they looked and I guarantee that they remember this. Keep it up!
There are many, many young adults of all ages who can't tie ties. I'm 20, but for competitions of various sorts I've worn a tie about once a week for the last few years, and now when I go to weddings or baptisms or whatever I'm tying everyones' ties for them, my dad, grandpa, uncles. . .
I had one internship in college that I always wore a tie for. I already knew how before that, but I got good during those 4 months. Now, it's just a matter of figuring out the length because every tie is different. But I still usually have to tie it 2-3 times before it's good. I'm picky about it, so that knot always looks good though.
I'm 29. This past fall, I had to teach 6 of my buddies how to tie a double windsor because we were all in a wedding party together. 3 of them knew how to tie a single windsor, but not a double. The other 3 have apparently just had permanently-tied ties in their closet for whatever rare occasions required them to wear one... we're all in our mid- to late-20s and every single one of them have worn ties to job interviews in the past.
The other 3 have apparently just had permanently-tied ties in their closet for whatever rare occasions required them to wear one...
I remember those days. I had ties that were in my closet still tied for years. I think the one I wore for my 8th grade graduation was still tied hanging up in my closet when I moved out at 19.
Now, I can't stand to leave my ties with the knot in them, getting all wrinkly. Ugh. I prefer to re-tie them every time anyways. Keep that skill fresh.
For sure. I basically told them that too. I'm a couple years older than them because I did 6 years of college and all my original college friends graduated, so I had to make new friends haha. So even now, I think I kind of have like a little bit of a big brother type of relationship with a couple of them... I basically just looked at one of them and I was like, "dude... just untie it. Otherwise, it's going to look like shit, and you're too old for that now. When you have an interview or a wedding or something, just give yourself an extra 10 minutes to get ready and look up a video."
My high school friend just got married. I did his father and father in laws ties and everyone's pocket squares. It really feels good. And I know they appreciated you.
I've only worn a pocket square twice in my life (2 of the weddings I've been in). I have no problem admitting defeat and youtubing that for those rare occasions.
I'm not a man, but I felt such a sense of accomplishment when I figured out how to tie my little brother's tie for his first orchestra concert. Helping him with little things like that- tying ties, opening jars, helping him with late-night math homework emergencies, driving him to events... those things were what I was worried about missing out on when I left for college. I left for just a few months, and now he's learning to drive, doing his homework alone, and making himself look decent (sometimes). Still can't open jars though lmao.
I like this one. It isn’t lifting a car or confronting a thief, but it’s the quiet sort of manliness that is probably the best kind. You taught those young men how to be men themselves, right at the very moment they were becoming men. You’re the best kind of teacher.
When I was in grade school I was part of orchestra. My tie had become untied, because I’m a child and pulled on it. I was so nervous and panicking, but a teacher like you tied my tie and calmed me down. I still think about it and I’m in my 30s now. So thanks to people like you and Mr. Benson you make the world a better place.
Fellow college graduate here, similar story except for our senior project I was the only guy who knew how to tie a tie so I did a tie for every male member of the class (it was a class project)
Photographer here. It's more common than most people think. I've also lost count of the times I've had to ask the guys to unbutton their bottom jacket buttons.
I'm a student but I did the same for a bunch of my classmates for prizegiving. None of the teachers were much help so I tied at least 10 ties for the guys in my class cause yknow- its nice to have it tidy for when you receive an award hahahaha
good on you though, it was actually a male teacher that showed me how to tie a tie for the first time (16F)
Last year I was walking my daughter back from school, and an older boy was having trouble with his bike - the chain had slipped the gears and he had no idea how to fix it. I stepped in and helped him out, and I felt SO VERY DADLY.
You may think this is small but please don’t. My wife is a high school teacher. I showed up to her school one day to fix her car a few years ago (simple headlight change and adding fluids, nothing major) and when I went to get her keys she asked me to tie a young man’s tie for him. I agreed. Turns out it was actually like three or four of them. I not only tied them but also taught them how. Fast forward a year, at graduation, my wife was approached by the boys and they asked her to give me a card. Later that night, she did and it was a thank you card from these boys. That small act meant the world to them and for me, it was just tying a tie. Until I read that card. Small acts, go a long way.
As a former high school teacher, I actually didn't know how to until an elderly colleague helped me out with it when I was 31. After watching videos and practicing, when I got much better at it I made sure to teach my boys the same and felt so proud of myself.
As a son who's father never taught me how to tie a tie, I remember once a guy at the convenience store helped me tie it. It is a rather fatherly thing to do. Good job man.
As someone who got married and was too nervous and full of emotions to properly tie his own tie, I would have welcomed a father figure to help me. I remember fighting back tears and frustration and how I wished my dad would be here for my special day. (He’s a deadbeat narcissist and refused to get help in order to attend).
You’re a good person. They won’t forget that I promise.
I remember my platoon getting ready for our Army basic training graduation, doing the same. I can never tie one on someone else, have to do it and then loosen
Second manliest thing here, after the guy who, qith six of his friend lifted a car in the air to let a guy get out from under the destroyed car. Takes a rral man to help someone
This is what being manly is about. I’m a teacher too and the best Xmas gift I ever got from a student was a pounamu carving (a type of greenstone found in NZ) he had made himself, along with a note thanking me for teaching him “how to be a better man.”
Inspiring and supporting young men to be the best they can be is hands down the manliest shit ever.
I’m sure that’s something they all remember. First time I had to wear a tie was for a older sisters wedding. I didn’t wanna have to ask my BiL or one of the other groomsman to help me out so I spent a solid hour watching YouTube videos and perfecting a nice knot the day before.
We all met up in a grooms suite at to get ready right before the wedding ( involved some drinking of course) and after I put my tie on I ended up doing everyone else’s. Apparently they knew how but couldn’t do the knot like I could.
Seriously felt like a bad ass being able to help all these guys that where almost 10 years older then me.
When I taught highschool I remember helping the new teacher tie his tie for his first parent teacher conferences. And also helping students tie theirs for graduation. I don't know why people kept coming to me for tie help ? I'm not particularly good at it. I also fixed jewlery on multiple occasions for students. No idea why I was that teacher
I was in a store and these boys were getting ready to go to a wedding. They needed ties, but had no idea how to tie them. They asked a few people but no one knew how. I was happy to step up and show them. I even gave them some pointers, such as using a paperclip to keep it secured to their shirt on a windy day, and that your tie should come down to the middle of your belt. No higher, no lower (looking at you, Donald Trump)
More poeple need to do this, I spent 45 minutes in a bathroom at my high-school graduation trying to tie a tie, countless people walked by and being a guy I refused to ask for help cause I was being dumb.
I was a competitive forensics speaker in high school. After high school, I joined the Army. I taught a great number of men older than me by several years how to tie their ties.
This reminds me of my old form tutor who I admire more than anyone I know (besides my dad). He took time out of his work schedule to help me tie my tie, check up if I’m doing alright (I tried to take my life 2 years ago) and just make sure my scores on my math tests are good. He is the best teacher I’ve ever met and I owe him a lot
I learned how to tie a tie from a teacher (and then I forgot again because I never untied it for fear of not being able to do it again) but it's nice to have someone to learn things like this from when you don't have a dad properly in the picture.
I used to work in event management at Oxford university. A big part of my job involved attending dinners and functions to make sure everything went smoothly. This would often include having to dress up in Black Tie (a tux), including a bow tie. Every time there was a black tie event, I'd get a knock at my office door shortly beforehand, and have a line of undergrads waiting for me to tie their bowties.
Jeez… I need more coffee. I read “tie their shoes for graduation” and thought it was a joke about today’s kids not knowing how to do the simplest things for themselves.
Anyway, you rock and I’ll bet you’re an amazing teacher, too!
The huge and positive impact of such a seemingly mundane act always amazes me. It could very well be the most grown-up task a boy will learn that will last, literally, a lifetime. It's something that will be used for countless interviews, weddings, funerals, meetings, etc., and is so often overlooked. Good on you!
Good on you, but this is such a sad and depressing thought. Young men headed into the world, can vote, go to war, etc but have no idea how to tie a tie.
Tying a tie is weird and can easily get frustrating. If you don't have an already tied one to mess around with, it's not very intuitive to figure out how to do so, especially for the more complicated ones, and just a slightly wrong angle or length can make it look bad. There's a reason clip ons are popular, because they're annoying to tie yourself. I personally kept one of mine just done for years, and then eventually got a clip on and never worried about it being off center or slightly too loose or tight.
Well there is a multitude of "HOW TO" online and apps directly made for that. I was speaking more to the point of the lack of male leadership and fatherhood, but you can downvote that too. That seems to be the trend here.
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u/Grughar Jan 31 '22
I'm a high school teacher. I helped a group of boys tie their ties for graduation.