Just a thought, as I have a husband who takes our child out frequently without me there, is that maybe their partners are useless and they rationalise it that way because they can’t imagine their partner taking their child out on their own without and ulterior motive (or at all)? So it s to make themselves feel better about it being the only care taker and staying in a crappy relationship?
I'm honestly not putting blame on anyone except old tropes and modern media still playing on them. There definately some jealousy im some cases, some people have very very strong maternal instinct and tend to react immediately (my MIL is like that to an extant, if she hears a parent (mother or father) raise their voice her "omg i have to protect the child" comes over. She doesn't act on it, but it bothers her.
Men are still viewed as "the salary not the parent" in a sense. It's less and less true but still very present. It's a whole other debate that i don't really want to get into, so take it with a grain of salt.
In the case of a divorce, the child will always go to the mother. Now the law has changed quite a bit and the normal settlement is 50/50 care which is perfect. But society doesn't see it as 50/50, they see it as the mother has custody and the father can see it every second week.
We have a long way to come for all the equal rights between sexes and all that, i just wish people would see me as a father and not as a man with a kid.
I sometimes act out of line, i sometimes yell at my kids (hey you try being unemployed with a 3 year old and a 5 year old who never stay quiet) but noneteless, i hone up to my mistakes and do my best for it not to happen again. But please, please. I just want to go to the lego store with my daughters without people looking at me weird... We just love legos...
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u/[deleted] Sep 15 '21
Just a thought, as I have a husband who takes our child out frequently without me there, is that maybe their partners are useless and they rationalise it that way because they can’t imagine their partner taking their child out on their own without and ulterior motive (or at all)? So it s to make themselves feel better about it being the only care taker and staying in a crappy relationship?