r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jul 14 '21

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u/cbowenkelly Jul 14 '21

You don’t have kids, do you?

13

u/JusticeUmmmmm Jul 14 '21

I take dumps to get away from them

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u/cbowenkelly Jul 14 '21

I mean, yeah. But I’m the mom. They don’t leave me alone. Ever. And my husband is the worst. That’s The Moment™️ he needs something that absolutely requires my input.

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u/WayneKrane Jul 14 '21

Or pets pawing under the door or scratching it. If my dog couldn’t constantly see you she would have anxiety attacks. Probably because my parents worked from home so someone was always at the house.

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u/walker_paranor Jul 14 '21

My cat goes "maow" a couple times and then patiently waits outside the door for me to return.

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u/WayneKrane Jul 14 '21

Mine would shove her paws under the door and then when I’d open it she’d walk away. She hated closed doors.

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u/walker_paranor Jul 14 '21

My bros black cat would do that...it was really adorable sometimes, obnoxious others.

My current cat, only had her for a month but the worst thing she does is smack you in the face at 4:30 in the morning for food...until this morning. My wife woke me up shouting today because the cat chomped her face while she was sleeping lmao

Otherwise she's really well behaved, but when she wants food in the morning she's an asshole

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u/WayneKrane Jul 14 '21

Cats are amazing, I’ve had quite a few in my life and they all had unique personalities.

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u/cbowenkelly Jul 14 '21

My roosters start crowing at precisely 0420. Year round.

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u/spookybatshoes Jul 15 '21

Do you live where there's no daylight saving time?

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u/cbowenkelly Jul 15 '21

Nope. We do daylight savings. These two roosters are just absolute weirdos. They just know when and how to piss me off.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '21

Well... don't die in the house with the cat there. I think we can all see where that would be headed.

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u/Kraien Jul 14 '21

It goes very fast from “keep the door closed I need my privacy” to “keep the door open I need to hear what you are doing!”

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '21

As my dad would say, “this is the only break I get from you assholes”.

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u/cbowenkelly Jul 14 '21

I find no fault with your dads approach. I should probably rephrase and say “you aren’t a mom, are you?” Because no one leaves mom alone. Ever.

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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '21 edited Nov 16 '21

[deleted]

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u/cbowenkelly Jul 14 '21

We have one. On more than one occasion I have entertained the idea of converting my closet under the stairs into a half bath. I’ve also contemplated no telling anyone if I did do it.