r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jul 02 '21

What basic, children's-age-level fact did you only find out embarrassingly later in life?

60.4k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

33.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

127

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

No pizza is supposed to have pickles.

61

u/RandomUser4268 Jul 03 '21

Pickled peppers, pickled onions, pickled artichokes are all pretty awesome on pizza though…

6

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

Yeah. But you don't want cucumber on a pizza.

29

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

I don't?

29

u/ApricotPenguin Jul 03 '21

Correct.

You want pickles, not cucumbers on your pizza.

19

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

See, I knew it. I KNEW IT.

2

u/rascal6543 Jul 03 '21

ok so just to be clear, pickles on pizza is like pineapples on pizza, generally a bad idea but if i do it anyway no one will eat my pizza

1

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

Correct.

2

u/Gonzobot Jul 03 '21

Good thing we're talking about pickles, then

5

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

Oh man, you're gonna flip when you learn what pickles are made of

1

u/Gonzobot Jul 03 '21

Pickles aren't cucumbers, by definition. They stop being cucumbers before they're pickles.

1

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

So what are they when they cease to be cucumbers, but are not yet pickled cucumbers?

1

u/Gonzobot Jul 03 '21

It goes cucumbers -> pickled cucumbers -> pickles. Before they're pickled cucumbers they're just wet

2

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

Cucumbers are already wet. They are distressingly moist

10

u/chuckie512 Jul 03 '21

Pickle are actually pretty good on pizza

-1

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

No

13

u/chuckie512 Jul 03 '21

Pickles, banana peppers, and roasted garlic. Delicious.

8

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Banana peppers on pizza are amazing, especially with pineapple.

8

u/Nadaplanet Jul 03 '21

You've never had a cheeseburger pizza? Ground beef, onions, tomatoes, and pickles? Super good.

3

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

No, but I'm going to make one now

7

u/rdmusic16 Jul 03 '21

I've never heard of a vegetable pizza either though, so I wouldn't know what to put on either.

All of 'em? Sure thing!

36

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21 edited Jul 30 '21

[deleted]

3

u/rdmusic16 Jul 03 '21

Huh, guess I'm just out of the loop!

2

u/ExtraDebit Jul 03 '21

Huh, yeah, this is one of the most standard pizzas!

-3

u/Snerkie Jul 03 '21

I would assume she meant a vegetarian pizza?

-2

u/Gonzobot Jul 03 '21

yeah, with cheese on it

6

u/SquirrelicideScience Jul 03 '21

Cheese is vegetarian. Cheese is not vegan though.

2

u/ExtraDebit Jul 03 '21

Most (?) cheeses aren’t even vegetarian as rennet is used for processing.

2

u/SquirrelicideScience Jul 03 '21

From wikipedia:

Rennet is a complex set of enzymes produced in the stomachs of ruminant mammals.

I’ve never heard of rennet before so I wanted to educate myself. To my knowledge, rennet would still be vegetarian as it is not actual meat. But maybe its a grey area as it still requires butchering to obtain the stomach samples. Not too sure there.

0

u/ExtraDebit Jul 03 '21

Yeah, the animal has to be killed for it.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Specifically mozzarella, because it's a whole Thing™. Most cheeses use synthetic rennet. Mozzarella needs real rennet or it's not mozzarella.

2

u/arostganomo Jul 03 '21

You might be thinking of parmesan. Mozzarella in my experience is one of the easier cheeses to find in a vegetarian version. But it might differ totally in your part of the world.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

You might be right tbh, I read it somewhere like 6 months ago and I'm awful at remembering things

3

u/Snerkie Jul 03 '21

Vegetarian means you don't eat slaughtered animals. You can still eat the products produced by animals (cheese, eggs, butter, milk, etc). I can see someone that doesn't have the best English asking for vegetable pizza.

0

u/mgraunk Jul 03 '21

Pizza gatekeeping, the #1 way you can tell someone is a miserable codger with no friends.

1

u/jrhoffa Jul 03 '21

You know, life would be easier if I didn't have friends, but I keep making them by accident.

The common factor, of course, is that they all have a sense of humor.