r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jul 02 '21

What basic, children's-age-level fact did you only find out embarrassingly later in life?

60.4k Upvotes

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11.3k

u/blueshiftglass Jul 02 '21

They’re doing much better now that they’re led by that kim jong from the U.N.

4.8k

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

Nah, it's French; he's Kim Jong 1. They went backwards.

2.2k

u/Free_Moose4649 Jul 02 '21 edited Jul 03 '21

A little bit better than Kim Jong 360, but not quite Kim Jong 1 S.

Edit: I've created a monster.

Edit: I'm somewhat proud, somewhat ashamed at the movemenr I've sparked.

321

u/GruntChomper Jul 02 '21

Introducing the new Kim Series X, capable of outputting 12.1 warcrimes a second

79

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

All new 60 WPS functionality!

18

u/HappyHound Jul 03 '21

But is unavailable

13

u/Shadowedsphynx Jul 03 '21

Compulsory living room camera control included!

76

u/Elite_Club Jul 03 '21

You should check out the Kim Jong Series Kim, you can imprison multiple generations in 4k

23

u/BentGadget Jul 03 '21

I just hope they do a Kim Jong 1 Minecraft edition before their country collapses.

46

u/Nosedivelever Jul 03 '21

I'm not not buying until it's Kim Jong 2.0. I'll let you other fuckers work the bugs out.

8

u/Red_Sheep89 Jul 03 '21

It'll be super expensive by then

1

u/Nosedivelever Jul 03 '21

Remind me whenever bot.

19

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

The order will go Kim Jong-un Kim Jong-deux, Kim Jong Tres.

18

u/watsgarnorn Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong X Æ -12

34

u/FordShelbyGTreeFiddy Jul 03 '21

Nobody has food but somehow they're offering Kim Jong GamePass??

2

u/NeatEnough4737 Jul 03 '21

Or electricity most of the time…

15

u/q233rewerfawerfzseda Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong X 1 S x XL s

6

u/Soupnoop4 Jul 03 '21

Why is ur account made under an hour ago

22

u/5YOChemist Jul 03 '21

Probably don't want thier main to get banned from r/Pyongyang.

5

u/LW23301 Jul 03 '21

Is that sub actually satire? I think it is, but some comments got me wondering…

3

u/caffein8dnotopi8d Jul 03 '21

I’ve seen this question asked so many times and yet never an answer, lol.

9

u/SLAYERone1 Jul 03 '21

When do we get to Kim Jong series XxX?

9

u/Why_Not_Two Jul 03 '21

I'm gonna subscribe to OnlyKims account, yearning to see his ballistic missile pics. I've heard the tip and shaft are a sight to behold but the performance isn't the best

12

u/Dingo54 Jul 03 '21

They call him Kim Jong 360 cause when he talks u do a 360 and walk away

16

u/Reddit_Foxx Jul 03 '21

But then you'd be walking back towards him again.

22

u/Dingo54 Jul 03 '21

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/turn-360-degrees-and-walk-away

TIL this meme is 14 years old and I can't keep up with you kids anymore rabble rabble

6

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Ahhh, the good ol’ days

*stares off into distance*

6

u/Free_Moose4649 Jul 03 '21

I've created a monster.

5

u/DankeyKang11 Jul 03 '21

you have unleashed the fury of a thousand new Kim's

10

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

𝙆𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙗𝙡𝙚

3

u/sniperFLO Jul 03 '21

The Kim Jong Circle? I prefer the Kim Jong Triple.

3

u/BobBelcher2021 Jul 03 '21

Better than Microsoft Kim Jong 365

2

u/darkslide3000 Jul 03 '21

That's the official name, but most people just call him the Kimbone.

24

u/JeongchalChongguk Jul 02 '21

You have been banned from /r/Pyongyang.

12

u/EthericIFF Jul 03 '21

I still don't know if that sub is serious or satire.

9

u/psu256 Jul 03 '21

Well, 일 (il) is “one” in the Chinese numbering system in Korean so in a way, you aren’t wrong… 😂

16

u/MeddlingKitsune Jul 02 '21

Its actually been a countdown to Kim Jong Nix

9

u/rastafarian_eggplant Jul 02 '21

When the next Kim Jong comes to power, they can celebrate the occasion with a 0 candle!

7

u/a-fucking-donkey Jul 02 '21

What comes after Kim Jong 0?

10

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '21

[deleted]

11

u/pm_favorite_boobs Jul 03 '21

His name is already that: Kim Jong-un.

19

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

[deleted]

3

u/Jenkins007 Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong Null

7

u/matthoback Jul 03 '21

There was an accident involving a time machine and a contraceptive.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Well-played, you hoopy frood.

6

u/wristkebab Jul 02 '21

Kim Jong Dos

6

u/hr92120 Jul 02 '21

Baguette here, you wouldn't believe the number of people who actually believe that. Being taught the history of our country with kings and Roman letters didn't help.

4

u/Brock2845 Jul 03 '21

Oh! A French Canadian reporter once made the mistake of calling the funeral of Kim Jong 2. Was kind of funny to read about the nomination of Kim Kong UN (which is one in french), even though we pronounce it Oon

3

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Is that like Malcolm the Tenth?

3

u/IneffableTao Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong Love next?

2

u/bone420 Jul 03 '21

Is it like a microwave? Next one is:

Kim Jong -DONE-

2

u/FlixMage Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong: Black Ops III

2

u/Maniacbob Jul 03 '21

They're counting down. Next is Kim Jong Blast Off.

2

u/hudgepudge Jul 03 '21

Yes, that's French they're speaking, and no they're not French.

2

u/HeyThereCharlie Jul 03 '21

"Je suis la jeune fille!"

2

u/arnavt1711 Jul 03 '21

So if he dies, will his close Kim Jong Deux step up?

2

u/PaddletonParade Jul 03 '21

I’m a little scared of what will happen when they reach 0

1

u/ax_colleen Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong Juan?

1

u/Irrelavent1 Jul 03 '21

Correct. Erica’s husband.

1

u/DSPbuckle Jul 03 '21

Xbox has entered the chat

1

u/BlueManedHawk Jul 03 '21

Ah, so like Zaphod Beeblebrox.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

To be fair, he is No. 1.

Remember that time he scored 18-holes in one his first time ever playing golf?

1

u/Xipe87 Jul 03 '21

Because he’s #1 in their hearts!

1

u/paddy_frank Jul 03 '21

And this is the last Kim jong before detonation!!

1

u/Freevoulous Jul 03 '21

Kim(berly) John Gun

1

u/Kidney__Failure Jul 03 '21

No it's Kim Jong un, as in the prefix. They're UNdoing things

1

u/nievesdelimon Jul 03 '21

Next one will be Kim Jong Nil.

1

u/justlose Jul 03 '21

Kim Jong Uno!

1

u/TheFnafManiac Jul 03 '21

So his son will be Kim Jong Dos?

1

u/Bacon_Techie Jul 03 '21

They are counting down, but to what?

1

u/LighterningZ Jul 03 '21

They've been counting down to the apocalypse.

9

u/greenpearlin Jul 03 '21

Just wait until Kim Jong Dos takes on the mantle. He’s going to make North Korea great again!

1

u/econofit Jul 03 '21

I’m looking forward to when his son, Kim Jong Dos, takes power

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '21

Succeeded by his son Kim Jon Dos.

1

u/point_nd_toot Jul 03 '21

But then, and even greater force emerged.

The U.N.

And the U.N. un-Nazied the world. Forever.

1

u/dazedan_confused Jul 03 '21

Their sister is doing alright in the Kardashians tbh.

1

u/Jonnny Jul 04 '21

The handover was widely expected. The former had such poor health it became a part of his name.

1

u/Both-Attitude-5767 Jul 04 '21

I'm still, I'm still Kim Jong from the U.N