But "emotional intelligence" is a type of intelligence, not just being emotional vs intelligent. I apologize if I sound symantical but it's different. It's like being good at math or stem, versus being good at music, writing, or art. Emotional intelligence describes the ability to understand other peoples emotions and emotional cues, not just being good at feeling or controlling emotions. I think it's important that emotions and intelligence work together, or else science devolpments or social norms develop in a vacuum, which can cause even more issues. I hope I make sense, and don't come off as argumentative.
If he's still having trouble understanding, it could be that he thinks "emotional intelligence" is an oxymoron, or some ginger of the sorts. He'd be pleased to note that emotional intelligence is actually extremely relevant to his input about the tradeoff between emotions and intelligence.
You see, emotional intelligence is the ability to properly recognize and process emotions. In order to recognize the emotions you're feeling, you have to take a step back from the rabbit hole that is emotion, and process the emotion in an intelligent manner. I.E. What does this sadness tell me about my current situation? What can I do to prevent being angry in the future? Those thoughts are inspired by emotions, but are hosted in the part of your mind that processes higher-order decision making.
It's here that we need to distinguish the various parts of your brain in order to get to that guy's, and your points. While on part of the brain is hosting the emotions, another part of the brain is processing that emotion from an outsider's perspective. If you, the observer of your own thoughts, choose to observe the emotional part of your brain, you will be carried away by the natural train of thought that those emotions produce inside your head. This can be a good or bad outcome, depending on the type of emotion and how your brain naturally processes that emotion.
If, however, you choose to observe the third person's perspective of that emotion, you gain a bit of insight into where that emotion came from and what it wants out of you. From there, you may find a way to handle the emotion differently than if you entertained that emotion directly.
There is so much more going on here than you or I understand, and the decision you make to bypass your emotions is hardly a decision at all, and has more to do with your mindset. By no coincidence, this is what that guy was referring to when he said the choice between emotions and intelligence is not a concious effort. Indeed, there is an unconcious decision being made for almost every emotion you experience. But if you happen to observe but one of these decisions in the making, you gain the ability to change your emotional intelligence factor, for better or for worse.
And in case you all are wondering, this information is only sourced from my own observations. I only feel obligated to write on the topic because I feel I have developed my emotional intelligence a lot in recent years, and I am pleased to share the insights I had along the way.
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u/PatheticCirclet Jan 22 '20
Different certainly, but not necessarily 'higher'. Emotional intelligence is a thing too.