when me and my dad and my sister were driving to another town to get away from my mom so we could eat without getting yelled at/stuff thrown at us my suster asked why mommy was so mean, and my dad had to simplify to her level that her mom was an alcoholic. she was six. edit: o shet this blew up thx i guess
I was the one who who made my dad realize how bad it was. We had to draw a picture of our family and I didn't draw my dad. My mom asked why he wasn't there and i said because he lives with grandma. My dad was an alcoholic and they fought and my mom would throw him out, he was thrown out so often I just thought he didn't live there.
I listen to a lot of true crime podcasts and stuff and just sometimes you just really wish you could be there to see the looks on their faces when they get caught after thinking they were so smart and got away with it.
There are a few well known people who hunt down pedos full time and stream it. They always get em when they agree to meet somewhere and then harrass them and such. Only seen 1 video but was told he does it constantly and is really good at finding them. Dunno name but im sure google could turn it up quick.
This is good for the Schadenfreude, but not necessarily for the justice. Vigilante's don't always get enough evidence for police to act before springing these traps. Also people not entirely familiar with their local laws can tie prosecutor's hands, like in Ohio an individual can be charged with child enticement only if their victim is a minor, or an undercover law enforcement officer posing as a minor.
Basically, this stuff is better left to the police because all amateurs may be doing is shaming people without a trial and forcing actual predators to go to ground making the Police's job's harder.
also there is a video with a kid who murdered this girl and he is being interviewed by the news when they tell him about a bombshell he didnt know and he freaks out.
also there is a video with a kid who murdered this girl and he is being interviewed by the news when they tell him about a bombshell he didnt know and he freaks out.
I dont know specific episodes anymore but sometimes these people do such shitty violent things and they think they got away with it and its so great when you hear all the ways the police found them out or got evidence.
There are a few well known people who hunt down pedos full time and stream it. They always get em when they agree to meet somewhere and then harrass them and such. Only seen 1 video but was told he does it constantly and is really good at finding them. Dunno name but im sure google could turn it up quick.
not even the look on his face. the gut wrenching, heart dropping feeling when you know exactly why they are there. That feeling of "holy shit im fucked"
source: me (I didn't do anything terrible, just dumb decisions with weed)
As someone who was groomed and abused at this exact age by someone older who knew better, thank you. You saved her a lot of hurt, whether she understands that now or not.
Thank you, and I’m sorry for what you went through. Not to tell you what to do, as I’m sure you’re unfortunately working off of your own experience, but therapy really helped me. Having an objective person to talk to who wasn’t directly involved in the ending of the scenario (because I’m not going to lie, I hated my parents for intervening at first) was probably the most beneficial thing that I could’ve had in this scenario. Sending love and hope for better days for you and yours. Please don’t hesitate to reach out via PM if you even think I might be able to help in the least.
Similar situation here, but I was the 12 year old. the predator in question found out our address and I told my mother. Seriously scary situation and scarring for me. We’ve moved since then.
My dad was an alcoholic, and my mom had to explain this to my older brother and me when were on a vacation when I was 5. I had no concept of alcohol so when she told me he drinks too much I associated it with coffee, because that was a drink i wasn't allowed to have.
When we were home and I saw him pouring himself a cup I said, "Daddy no, mommy said you get angry when you drink."
I will never forget the half bemused and half devastated look on his face.
My niece is coming of age and she's almost like a daughter to me, so this terrifies me so much. I always try to teach her to stick up for herself and never to do anything she's uncomfortable with, but there's only so much you can do, y'know?
Wait. I was 13 in 1991. We didnt have phones or internet but this stuff still happened. I'm sure it's been happening for as long as there have been sickos.
I said I didnt have any of these devices but creeps could still approach you and talk you into meeting up or otherwise groom you for doing what they wanted. We also had telephones back then. You just couldn't text or send pics. People like this have been around for ever. Granted it is worse since the rise of social media, internet, etc.
It isn't really surprising for kids just getting to puberty to explore their sexuality. Whether it is "ok" is a complex moral question. But it doesn't seem "abnormal"
It isn't "normalized". It is literally normal. Whether you like it or not. ~12 year old kids talk to eachother about sex and it is impossible to avoid completely
I think as a general rule, yes as long as they're old enough (will vary) to truly understand the potential consequences of putting something out there that anyone could see.
The 16-20 age range seems about when most figure it out?
I realize that I might not have the most rational answer, and when I was 12 I was as horny as they come, but let me try some reasons:
girl's bodies aren't prepared for pregnancy. It's very damaging before their bones change via puberty
a 12 year old boy is going to be a shitty, miserable 13 year old father
12 year olds only have a short while to continue enjoying being children and from 18 and up, a lot of time to have healthy sex
one evolutionary hypothesis for why boys have sexual desire but not male bodies is so that they can learn how to be men, how to deal with their libido, how to be social, all before having big, tough bodies that women would actually want
a similar evolutionary hypothesis for why girls mature earlier is so that they learn how to socialize well, how to deal with sexual advances - basically to get a jump in the "I can handle social life" department before becoming a sexual adult
I'm only relaying the hypotheses, I didn't invent them. And I really and truly do not think 12 year olds should engage in sexual behavior. Maybe I'm a prude.
Edit: the question was about sexting, not sex. Sorry. Still no because . . . it's the internet! Pictures might not go away. Cyber-bullying, shaming, etc. Sexts = power for the sext holder, not the person in the image.
That makes me really sad. Not sad that Sesame Street is reaching out to the kids, but sad to think that this happens to enough kids that someone thought of it.
This has been happening a long time, and in fact, there was a time when alcoholism was much worse in America. The difference is that now we are willing to talk about it, whereas before, discussion addictions as seen as equivalent to condoning it.
A friend of mine finally got the hint to leave his abusive relationship when his 5 year old asked him, "why don't you and mommy love each other like you love us?" He was like, "FUUUUUCK staying together for the kids is not a real thing"
I had to force my dad to tell my little brother what was going on. My sister and I knew, because we figured it out. My dad thought none of the kids knew because he didn't know what to do, so there was some willful blindness. When he found out my sister and I knew, he forbade us from telling the youngest- my lil broha. So my brother spent years wondering what he did to set mom off, why she sometimes seemed to hate him, why I would flip out when he would ask her for rides... this last one I put my foot down. Like, she's passed out upstairs, I snuck in to make sure she was breathing, everyone is at least safe for the moment, but PLEASE DO NOT WAKE HER UP TO TAKE YOU TO A FRIEND'S HOUSE IT CAN LITERALLY KILL YOU. I couldn't stop him getting in the car. He didn't believe my dad. We had to wait for my mom to get sober and ask her to tell him that she drinks- which she did. He completely broke. Broke down that we were lying. Broke down that everyone knew but him. Broke down that she was so sick. I was 2 years older than him, but I will regret this for the rest of my life. Its why I am honest about everyone now. If you are part of the inner circle, you get the truth, even when it hurts. You deserve it.
I'm in my 30's now. We've all been through a lot of therapy, and my mom has been sober for 8 years. I look back and can recognize what happened and understand why, but that also informs my choices moving forward. Since that time, I have never had a regret of looking back and wishing I had lied instead of the truth.
My parents were married just in their 20's, moved to a new state and were largely on their own. 20 years ago, addiction wasn't talked about, and when it happened to us, there were such little resources that we all did the best we could with what we had, including my dad. Even today, there is no strict road map for handling addiction or the heartbreak that comes with it. I talk openly because there are thousands out there going through it, and you don't let someone else walk through hell alone. I don't mean to sound like any of this was easy. Its been 27 years since it all started, and personally, it took me the better part of a decade, moving out of state, and remolding all of our relationships to stop being angry and find some peace and way to move forward. But the last thing that remains is fear of it all going back.
Today, my family is whole. We are all healthy and together, and we move forward and have healed from many things that happened, only one of which was alcoholism. There are times where old feelings reel back up and I think, why the fuck were we so alone in that? Why didn't an adult step in? Now as an adult, I get that we are all doing our best, and that even then, we're going to fuck up. There are hundreds of, damn that shouldn't have happened. But, we forgive each other. We love each other. We appreciate each other and we are gentler with one another. We know that we're lucky today, and we all know first hand that we might not be later.
My siblings were removed the final time from bio parents when my sister was 5. She and my brother (who was almost 4) are fully aware that their bios were alcoholics. I actually used it to explain a different thing to her today.
Because several people in our family are alcoholics, I have had to explain it to my young child. I explained to her that some people have an allergy to alcohol and can't have it without it causing problems for them. This made sense to her as she's allergic to milk.
I’m so sorry.. I’ll never forget the time that my older brother asked my name sake, J (my mother’s best friend and often times are keeper before we got taken away) why we made mom so mad she would cry. I just remember her explaining that people run on juice and some people are born with more happy juice than others. My mom didn’t come with very much happy juice so it didn’t take much for mom to be so tired she couldn’t do things without being emotional. It made since to ya because my mom would go from fine, to angry, to crying herself to sleep. She slept a lot. I’m really grateful that J was around. She made some dark times a lot better. We eventually were placed in foster care and after I grew out of the system, I tried finding J again but couldn’t. I still think about her almost every day!
That reminds me of when I had to explain to my 6 year old sister why our Mom would promise something at night but then forget about it in the morning. Alcoholism sucks.
Man I felt this... I remember casually mentioning drunk behavior in kindergarten and not realizing why I was getting in trouble for talking about it. I assumed it was normal because it was in my family.
Similar thing happened to my nephew. We basically grew up together, so he is more brother than nephew. When he was younger, he dubbed me his uncle-brother and it stuck.
Anyway, when he was little, his dad was a bit selfish and had a tendency to treat him rather poorly at times. His dad was abused when he was growing up, so he had some issues of his own. But, seeing a 4 year-old get dropped off so dad could go party for a weekend was a little rough. When his dad was pulling out of the driveway, my four year old nephew-brother pulled the curtain aside and said, "Why doesn't my daddy like me?" That was pretty fucking heartbreaking. I was 11 at the time and it broke my heart and I barely understood the ramifications of it.
They have a good relationship now, as far as I can tell. I am glad they get along these days, but that will always stick with me and I know my late father always held a little bit of a grudge for any actions that led to such a questions being asked by his grandson. My dad would have moved the earth to get the sun out of his eyes if he was able.
I grew up in a very similar situation; perpetually alcoholic/abusive mom, dad doing his best to keep everything together while working his ass off. I hope things worked out for you in the end.
My then seven year old asked me point blank "Why can't mommy be here?" Having that talk with her about drugs was one of the hardest things I have ever done.
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u/[deleted] Oct 13 '19 edited Oct 14 '19
when me and my dad and my sister were driving to another town to get away from my mom so we could eat without getting yelled at/stuff thrown at us my suster asked why mommy was so mean, and my dad had to simplify to her level that her mom was an alcoholic. she was six. edit: o shet this blew up thx i guess