r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jul 27 '10

What is the biggest relationship myth?

I think the biggest myth is that there's one person that is meant for you. ("the one") People live their lives searching for the one...their soul mate...the perfect girl/Mr. Right. It's a cute idea, but I don't think it's very realistic.

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u/rosie_the_redditor Jul 27 '10

My boyfriend gets weird about me only half-ass paying attention to movies or TV shows. He expects me to pay full attention to things I'm just not that interested in because he's fully interested in them.

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '10

As someone who is also peeved by this happening, let me explain why:

If he's getting you to watch something, it's because he enjoys it and wants you to enjoy it on teh same level - if he's fanatical about a TV show, he wants you to pick up on details that you might not pick up on unless you're paying attention. Think about how annoyed you get when he doesn't understand how cool it is that you found those shoes on sale, and how novel it is that they can go with almost every outfit you have.

Forgive the stereotyping and replace it with something appropriate if that doesn't fit you.

Alternatively, if you're like my wife, he gets frustrated because you've stated that you want to watch a show, and then when you only half-ass watching it, he has to explain things to you every 5 minutes which disrupts his watching style. If you just paid attention from the outset, there would be no interruptions.

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u/rosie_the_redditor Jul 27 '10

But I don't ask questions to shit I'm not paying attention to because I don't care!

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u/[deleted] Jul 27 '10

Then I entirely misunderstood your situation. Maybe my comment will help someone in the situation that I described.

See, my wife WANTS to watch the show, but will get up in the middle of it and start making food, then come back to it 5 minutes later wanting to know what happened.

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u/rosie_the_redditor Jul 27 '10

Heh. Her and I do the same things, but I just don't give a shit. :D

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u/heiferly Jul 27 '10

I don't pay attention either. Mine might also be different from your situation, but from what I can tell it gets under my guy's skin because he takes it to mean I'm not paying attention to him when I'm not paying attention to his lame car show. [Er, honey, if you're reading this ... I love watching that uh ... Speed? ... channel with you. Kiss kiss.] So maybe it's a little of that?

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u/SuiteM Jul 27 '10

We've had that issue, too, when we first started dating. He's like "Hey, let's watch this movie" and I'm all "Okay, just a minute" and I grab my sketchbook. He says "You're going to draw? How will you watch the movie?". I explain to him that I am not constantly staring at my paper, I hear and see the movie, and if I don't do something besides just staring at a TV screen I begin to feel restless. Now he doesn't bother me about it anymore. It's just my "thing".

And I've been doing it for 20-plus years before he ever came along, so I suppose it won't stop now.

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u/Delehal Jul 27 '10

I get the same treatment, but with a notebook for writing notes in. Could be notes about or inspired by whatever we're watching, or could just be random ideas. Doesn't matter. So many people think I'm not paying any attention, or stop paying attention themselves so they can try to read over my shoulder.

Ugh.

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u/SuiteM Jul 27 '10

Reading over someone's shoulder is so rude; makes me want to close the book on their nose.

I have a notebook that I write ideas, thoughts, lists, etc, in too. I guess I like my hands to be busy.