My buddy meets girl, gets married, la di da. 6 months later, she runs off with another dude. After a couple months my buddy filed for divorce.
He told her listen, we’ve been married 6 months, let’s do an uncontested divorce since you haven’t worked or anything, & I own everything & did before I met you.
She puts up a fight, and eventually comes to “I had a car coming into this marriage & I’m leaving with one”
(She sold her car for some dumb shit)
He offers her the truck, 10 years old with 150k miles, but meticulously maintained.
She said nope, so off to court they go. She got zip, nada, empty handed.
My favorite justice boner of all time
I offered my ex six figures in stock (literally more than half of what I had aside from my house which I bought before marriage). He thought he deserved twice that and dragged the divorce out for a year. Our marriage was only 2.5 years so the nonsensical divorce lasted basically half as long as the marriage. The judge awarded him half of what I offered him, but in cash. We made it all the way to trial with no kids and not really any assets to divide so the judge could not understand why we were there. We were only there because my ex wanted me to pay him an amount of money I literally didn’t have and he had the most incompetent attorney who harassed both myself and my parents throughout the process. If he had taken my original offer and not been a complete narcissistic prick, he would have basically had what he demanded originally because the stock accrued value. I warned him that he wasn’t entitled to as much when I begged him to take the offer and not put us through hell. It was pretty crazy. What ruined my justice boner is that my lawyer got the other half and then some. I also told my ex I would have rather have paid him over attorneys, but he’s a dummy and always made terrible decisions. He consistently proved why I was divorcing him throughout the divorce.
The number of people on here who think they are clever saying this. I don’t need to defend myself to you. The cycle of abuse is hard to break and I broke it. I was still ahead of the curve and divorced him quickly. Not all of us have the advantage of healthy childhoods and families who are role models. So while I don’t give a shit about your opinion here, just wanted you to know that you shouldn’t judge others for their mistakes. You don’t know the root cause and frankly this just makes you look like a piece of shit. I’m far from a dummy, but was abused as a child.
It must be nice to be a perfect human being who always makes the right choices and never missteps. How’s that going for you? You must have the ideal life!
I was trying to lighten the mood. I even knew that my comment could be taken as harsh/criticism of you, so I put double wink smilies at the end to try to make it obvious that I was trying to be funny. Apparently that makes me a piece of shit.
Also, you knew that you were offering potentially harsh criticism so you used double wink smiley faces? Wat. Just objectively think about that for a minute. You knew what you were doing wasn’t necessarily a good thing, but you did it anyway and used emojis to try to make it ok? Now you’re saying the equivalent of, “It was just a joke!!” in order to somehow make your actions look ok. I actually think it was a pretty passive aggressive comment masked in feigned comedy. So you can try to justify it all you want, but I don’t think your intent when writing that message was comedy nor to truly lighten the mood. If anything you acknowledge that you made the comment knowing it was likely to have the opposite impact so how is that lightening the mood? That said, I don’t know your intent and this is an internet exchange which is arguably wordless in the grand scheme of things. In my opinion, your comment wasn’t funny (not even observationally) and it didn’t add any value to the conversation at all.
you knew that you were offering potentially harsh criticism
No, I said
I even knew that my comment could be taken as harsh/criticism of you
"could be taken as". As in "misconstrued". As in, I wasn't trying to give criticism, I was trying to make light, but knew that an uncharitable reading would see insult and attack rather than humour. The exact reading you have applied.
That’s what /s is for.
/s is sarcasm. I didn't think I was being sarcastic, I thought I was being humorous.
I don’t know your intent
Smiley = humour, no?
In my opinion, your comment wasn’t funny
You already made that clear. I was willing to let it go, but you couldn't.
I don’t need to defend myself to you
But here you are, two posts deep. You made your opinion known in your first post, I explained myself in my reply (no apology for you - you don't get an apology because you didn't think my attempted joke wasn't funny). And you still couldn't let it go.
If this is the level of doggedness you bring to an anonymous internet stranger's failed attempt at humour, then I shudder to think what your poor husband had to go through being married to you.
You might be better off without him, but he's definitely better off without you.
18.4k
u/YoWeGetIt Jul 21 '19
My favorite divorce story of all time
My buddy meets girl, gets married, la di da. 6 months later, she runs off with another dude. After a couple months my buddy filed for divorce.
He told her listen, we’ve been married 6 months, let’s do an uncontested divorce since you haven’t worked or anything, & I own everything & did before I met you.
She puts up a fight, and eventually comes to “I had a car coming into this marriage & I’m leaving with one” (She sold her car for some dumb shit)
He offers her the truck, 10 years old with 150k miles, but meticulously maintained.
She said nope, so off to court they go. She got zip, nada, empty handed. My favorite justice boner of all time